A Child's Eyes
by dark rolling sea
Summary: Nicole Conrad witnesses her mother's death. Can Gibbs and team catch the killer and cope with the inner demons that insue? Final chapter is up, let me know if you like it. Reposted entire story. Enjoy it. There is now a sequel called A Child's Heart
1. Beginnings

**Disclaimer: NCIS and all characters relating to that show are not mine, I make no money from this. They belong to people other than me. I claim all original characters in the story.**

**AN: This story came out of nowhere and attacked me, forcing me to write it. I hope you enjoy and buckle in for a great ride. Enjoy. dark rolling sea.

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Chapter One: Beginnings

Johanna Conrad finished cleaning up the living room. She looked at her eleven year old daughter and smiled. The child seemed to be in a deep state of boredom, causing Johanna to frown as she sat down next to her.

"Nic, you ok?" she asked sweetly.

"Just nothing to do, mom," she replied with a sigh.

"I'm sure you can find something…"

"This sucks," she whined and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Nicole Samantha."

"Come on, mom! I'm so bored here!"

"I know it's difficult when we move to a new base, but, honey, I can't help it when they repost me."

"I know," she said softly closing her eyes and taking a deep breath.

"I'm sure you'll find a friend soon. School starts up again in a few days."

"Joy," the girl said rolling her eyes. She hated starting in a new school. It was the fourth move they had made in her life, always packing up and moving just when you get settled enough in your old life. She hated being a military daughter.

Her mother was a Lt. Commander in the Navy and that meant moving every few years from base to base. At least her mother didn't have to go to sea for six months at a time, or over to Iraq. That was the only plus in Nicole's eyes.

The girl shook her head and got up from the couch. Her mother watched her carefully as she aimlessly walked around the new living room. Nicole then stopped and stared at the pictures on the mantel.

"Want to go shopping? I don't have to report for duty until tomorrow," Johanna said with a smile. Nicole looked at her expectantly but then shook her head. She wasn't in the mood to shop. Her mother frowned.

"It's ok, mom, I'm just going to go unpack my room I think," she said. To Johanna she sounded a little defeated. Johanna simply nodded and watched her daughter disappear down the hallway. She wandered into the kitchen and began unpacking the items bound for that room.

Nicole hummed softly to herself as she unpacked her clothes and other belongings into her new room. She looked around at the starch white walls and sighed. She found the box with her posters in them and started to hang them on the walls, making the place look less like a mental institution and more like a bedroom. After the posters were on the wall she sat on the bed and stared at them, admiring her work. She decided this would do.

It had been a few hours since her conversation with her mom and she was starting to feel hungry now. She made her way into the kitchen and found her mother sitting at the table reading the newspaper. She looked up and smiled at Nicole.

"We eating soon?" Nicole asked taking a seat next to her mother.

"What do you feel like eating?"

"I don't know," she said drumming her fingers idly on the table.

"I was thinking of ordering delivery. Anything in particular you want?"

"I guess pizza will do," Nicole said with a smile. Johanna smiled in return and pulled out her cell phone. Nicole got up and walked away after her mother started the order and sat in the living room. She flipped the television on and surfed for a while never really settling on anything. Finally the food arrived and she and her mother ate in relative silence in the dining room. They were cleaning up the mess when Johanna finally broke the silence.

"I start tomorrow, so that means you're on your own. You start school on Tuesday," Johanna said as she tossed the empty pizza box into the trash.

"Ok," Nicole said softly.

"You ok, honey?"

"I just don't like a new place," she said quietly, pushing her hair out of her eyes.

"I know it's tough on you, but you'll start school in two days and things will be better."

Nicole just nodded and walked off towards her room. She shut the door and Johanna felt horrible for putting her daughter through this, but her career in the Navy meant a lot to her. She knew that once Nicole started at her new school she would be better off, she would make new friends and fit in.

The first couple weeks were always the toughest when they made a move, Johanna wasn't too worried about her daughter's mood. She knew eventually it would be ok. They would settle in and this would become home.

Gibbs sat in the interrogation room with a sailor. He was silent, and had been for five minutes, making the sailor sweat. He was also starting to shake. Gibbs continued to pretend to read a file, finally the sailor broke.

"Why am I here?" he said wiping his hands on his pants. Gibbs noticed the gesture and smiled softly.

"You tell me," Gibbs said calmly, watching him closely.

"I don't know," the sailor said, his voice cracking slightly.

"So you have no clue why we would want to question you?"

"No, sir."

"Don't call me sir," Gibbs barked harshly. "You're here, son, because you're involved in smuggling information."

"No, si…no."

"Don't try to deny it, sailor, we already have the evidence to lock you up. What I want is who you were helping."

"I don't know what you're talking about," the sailor said his voice full of stress. His hands were damp and his forehead had beads of sweat dripping down his face.

"There is no use in lying to me, sailor. Either you go to jail alone, or you can take whoever it is that paid you with you. Let me tell you it will look better for you if you talk to me in the long run."

The young sailor seemed to contemplate this last statement and then looked up at Gibbs. He wet his lips and took a breath. He waited, still thinking about the consequences of his actions, prior to and including this moment.

"If I give you the ring you go easier on me?"

"Maybe," Gibbs said leaning back in his chair. The sailor thought, eyeing Gibbs suspiciously.

"Why would I help you then if you don't give me a guarantee?"

"Tell you what, I'll just leave and you can do 20 to 30 for treason," Gibbs said flatly and started to gather up his things.

"Wait," the sailor said reaching out with his hand. He came close to, but never made contact with Gibbs. Gibbs stopped what he was doing, placing both hands firmly on the table in front of him.

"I'm listening," Gibbs said. It was then that the sailor spewed everything he knew to Gibbs about the divulging of information that had been going on for six months. After he was done Gibbs left the interrogation room and had Tony and Ziva start working on putting the new information to good use.

Gibbs went back to his desk and started to look into what the sailor had told him. They were close to bringing down this information leak now and Gibbs was happy. This was going to break this ring of smugglers once and for all.

They finally had all the names they needed and were putting together the finishing touches on the evidence against the main players. Gibbs gave McGee, Tony, and Ziva the go ahead to arrest the members of the ring. Case closed.

They sat in the bullpen doing the paperwork that was needed after a bust of this magnitude. Each one had their reports to prepare, crosscheck, and file. They were quiet as they plugged away at their work. Finally the day ended and the members of the squad left one by one.

It was just Gibbs when he looked at the clock. It was after nine in the evening. He grabbed his coat and headed for his house. Upon arriving he still didn't sleep. He went to the basement and started to work on his boat. It had been awhile since he had worked on her, the case taking up most of his time. It felt good to get back to her. He lost himself in the motions and euphoria that came with the manual work.

He woke the next morning under the boat with the plane sitting next to him, his hand still on the handle. He sat up slowing avoiding smacking his head off the ribbing of the boat and stretched his legs. He looked over at where he kept the sniper rifle locked and thought momentarily of Kate. He shook his head and took a deep breath. It would not be one of those days.

TBC…


	2. A Nightmare Unfolds

**Chapter Two: A Nightmare Unfolds**

A couple days had passed and Nicole had started school. She fell into a small group on the first day, being noticed by a girl in her class. At lunch the girl and her friend had sat with Nicole and struck a conversation. They started a friendship and everyday since they had hung together at school.

The girl was Denise Reinbeck and her father was also in the Navy. Nicole learned that the Reinbeck family lived not that far from her. It was a good start to making this base bearable. School was easy for Nicole; she didn't have a problem adjusting to this new environment. She had always been out going and made friends easily, but she figured that came more from necessity.

They had been there just over a week when Johanna saw the brightening in her daughter. It made Johanna smile, knowing that her daughter was once again fitting in. It made her job a lot easier knowing that Nicole would have friends around. Nicole was studying quietly in her room one morning when she heard her mother yelling at someone in the living room.

She put her pencil down and stared at her closed door for a moment waiting for her mother to stop. She didn't. Nicole then heard a man's voice in the house that she didn't recognize. She got up slowly from her desk, trying to make as little noise as possible.

She tip toed to the door and opened it slowly, peeking her head out carefully, and looked down the hallway. The yelling was louder now that her door wasn't there to buffer it. She didn't know what they were arguing over but her mother was telling the person in the house to leave.

Nicole quietly made her way down the hallway and slipped her head around the corner. She saw a man standing with his back to her, facing her mother. She couldn't see his face from this angle and she didn't dare move, with the risk of either of them spotting her.

Her mother screamed at the man as he lunged at her with something. Nicole froze in horror as she realized her mother was screaming in pain. It was then that Nicole noticed the blood. She ran down the hallway away from the scene in front of her and tried desperately not to cry aloud. She didn't want to draw the attention of the man to her. She made it to her room and quickly, but quietly shut the door and ran to the window.

She threw the window open and climbed out landing in a bush before managing to scramble down to the ground. When she had landed in the bush she felt a branch dig deep into her leg, but she ignored the pain. Tears were streaming down her face now as she couldn't remove the image of the man lunging at her mother and then the blood. The scream her mother let out was imprinted on her memory and playing over and over again in her mind.

She ran to a neighbor's house and banged on the door, but no one answered. She started to panic not knowing what to do. She wailed on the door with both fists, crying and yelling. No one came to the door.

The tears were so thick now she could barely see as she left the porch of that house and ran to the next one. She didn't know if the man was still in the house but she knew she needed to get help for her mother. She raced to the next door and slammed her small body into the wood. Pounding profusely with both hands she screamed for help.

Her foot decided to join in the action and before she knew it, she was banging, screaming, and kicking at the door. Finally it opened and she tumbled forward into the arms of a woman. The woman was immediately concerned, taking in the strange girl's appearance. The girl's eyes were bloodshot and tear soaked, her leg was lanced open and bleeding, her fists were bruised from banging on the door.

"What's the matter, honey?" she asked hurriedly pulling the girl back and holding her firmly by the shoulders.

"My mother!" Nicole wailed but no other words would form as she sobbed against the other woman.

"What's wrong?"

"My mother is in trouble!" Nicole finally managed to get out between chocked breaths. The other woman pulled her inside and closed the door, hurrying to the phone. She called the base security and told them about the girl and what she had said about her mother. She told them the condition the girl was in. They managed to get the house number from Nicole but she was starting to go into shock from the trauma.

The MPs made their way quickly to the unit and approached it with caution. They called out for the Commander that lived there but no one answered their hails. They went through the front door and immediately stopped. There was blood on the walls and the ceiling, and the floor. There was blood on the couch. The body of Lt. Commander Conrad was on the floor in front of the couch. They called NCIS.

Gibbs was just returning to his desk from a coffee run when his phone rang. Tony was sitting in his chair contemplating something Ziva had asked him and McGee was busy looking at his bank statements online. They hadn't had a case since they brought down the smuggling ring and they were all a bit cagy.

"Gibbs," he said after picking up the receiver. He listened for a few moments. "On our way."

"What is it, Boss?" Tony asked standing up. Ziva leaned forward in her chair in anticipation of leaving the office, and McGee looked around his computer monitor.

"Got a body, grab your gear, let's move," Gibbs said as he walked towards the elevator. They all jumped at the chance to get out of there and hustled to get everything ready. Finally they were on their way to the crime scene.

When they got there they set to work. Tony was taking pictures while McGee looked through the house for evidence. Ziva was talking to the MPs while Ducky was assessing the body. Gibbs stood in the doorway to the kitchen and stared at the body. It had been a brutal attack, very personal.

"Time of death, Duck?" Gibbs asked.

"It fits with the MPs story, Jethro, she died not more than three hours ago," Ducky said gathering up his equipment.

Gibbs simply nodded and looked over the body. He had heard the MPs story of how the body was discovered.

"Hey, Boss," Tony said as he walked up beside Gibbs.

"What?"

"This was pretty personal."

"I can see that, DiNozzo. Find me a motive," he said and looked over the pictures on the mantle. He left DiNozzo standing there and made his way outside. He walked to the house two doors down and found the MPs standing with another woman who had a little girl huddled to her leg. Gibbs approached them slowly, noticing the bandaging on the girl's leg, blood still soaking into the white gauze.

"Special Agent Gibbs," he said showing his badge and ID. "This the daughter?"

"Yes, Agent Gibbs," one of the MPs said. Gibbs nodded and squatted in front of the young girl. She looked at him with big empty brown eyes and it pained him to see the horror that lived there.

"What's your name?" he asked quietly of the girl. She absently pulled at the hem of her sleeve and kept licking her lips. Her eyes kept floating past Gibbs and landing on her house. She didn't answer him. "It's ok now. He can't hurt you," Gibbs said softly.

He reached out slowly and put a hand on her shoulder. She jumped and pulled back. Gibbs let his hand drop to his side and gave the girl a smile. Her attention came back to him. He saw the overload of emotion in her eyes. He stood up and looked around.

"You're the one that called the police?" he asked the woman standing with the girl.

"Yeah. She…she was pounding, and screaming, and kicking my door."

"Ok, did you see or hear anything before that?" Gibbs asked his attention still on the girl.

"No, I'm sorry, I didn't," the lady replied, looking almost ashamed she had missed something like this. Gibbs nodded.

"You know who she is?"

"They're new on the base. Just moved in last week sometime. I think their last name starts with a C but I don't know them. Never got a first name out of her."

Gibbs nodded and thanked the woman for her time. He squatted down in front of the girl again. Tony was walking towards him. Ziva and McGee were packing up the truck. Ducky and Palmer had moved the body and were ready to leave.

"Hi, my name is Gibbs, what's yours?" he asked softly with a smile. The girl eyed him with shock and wonder in her eye before she looked down at the ground.

"Nicole," she whispered softly. Gibbs nodded and reached out to her. The rest of the adults seemed to have backed away leaving a wide void around Gibbs and the girl. She looked up at him then. "Is my mom…dead?"

The pain in her voice cut Gibbs deep. He pulled the girl close to him and wrapped an arm around her. She buried her face in his shoulder and cried silent tears. He placed a soft kiss on her head and waited. Finally he pulled her back gently.

"Did you see what happened?" he asked softly. He saw the flicker of horror dance in her eye briefly before she forced it out. She simply nodded. Gibbs heart sank. She had seen what happened in there.

"Will you help her?"

"I will, I promise," Gibbs said. The girl simply nodded and leaned into him again, pressing her face into his shoulder. Gibbs scooped her up and carried her with him to the truck. Tony watched in slight surprise as Gibbs carried the child. He was so gentle with her.

"Ah, Boss?" he asked softly as Gibbs placed the girl in the front seat of the truck. Gibbs looked at Tony before looking back at the girl.

"I'll be right back, I just need to talk to Tony, ok?" he asked getting a small nod from the girl. He patted her shoulder than turned and motioned for Tony to walk with him away from her.

"What?"

"We're done here, ready to head back. That the daughter?"

"Yes."

"She see what happened…."

"Yes, DiNozzo, she did," Gibbs said quickly. Tony simply nodded and walked back to the truck. Gibbs looked around and thought about what to do. He was going to take the girl back to NCIS to talk to her. They would assume custody until they could locate a family member, or she was placed with social services.

When Gibbs came back to the truck he could see Nicole looking around for him. He walked up to her and saw her relax slightly upon seeing him again. He gave her a smile. She just looked at the ground. He saw the pain again and felt his heart break a little more. This was going to be a tough case he thought as he climbed into the truck.

TBC…


	3. Keeping A Promise

**Chapter Three: Keeping a Promise**

The ride to NCIS was silent. Nicole was sitting as close to Gibbs as the seating would allow. Once they were out of the truck she seemed to attach herself to his hip, not that he minded. Gibbs kept his arm draped over her shoulders.

Gibbs steered her towards his desk and everyone else scurried off to do what needed to be done. Evidence was taken to Abby's lab by McGee, Ziva and Tony were working on contacting people that knew the Lt. Commander. Gibbs had his eye on the frightened eleven year old.

McGee came back to the bullpen and was walking to his desk when Gibbs walked over to him. He grabbed him lightly by the arm and directed McGee to the chair. McGee looked up at Gibbs with surprise on his face.

"Find a relative of this girl," Gibbs said in a hushed tone. With that he let go and walked away. McGee watched him as he picked up his phone. He began his search, part of his attention still locked on Gibbs.

Gibbs squatted down in front of Nicole and smiled to the girl. He didn't get a response. He studied her for a moment, medium length blonde hair cut to circle her face with bangs across the forehead, deep brown eyes, filled with innocence, average size, or at least he thought for a ten year old girl. She was shaking slightly and silent tears were still running down her face. She looked at Gibbs.

"It's ok. Do you know of a relative or friend that can take you?" Gibbs asked softly. The girl stared at him and thought for a while. She shook her head.

"No, we just moved here," she said with a shake to her voice.

"Is there an aunt or uncle that could…"

"No," she said in a strained whisper. Gibbs nodded. He looked over at McGee then back at the girl. "Why'd he kill my mom?"

Gibbs wasn't ready for that question, but he had expected it to come. He looked at Nicole and took a deep breath. After laying a gentle hand on her shoulder he looked her in the eye as he spoke.

"That's what we're going to find out."

Nicole simply nodded and then looked to the floor. The pain that saturated her eyes pulled and burned at Gibbs' heart. He looked down as he gathered his own strength. When he looked up he saw Director Shepard standing by Tony's desk, watching him.

Gibbs stood and walked that way. He heard the muffled whimper from Nicole and looked back at her with a reassuring smile that he would be right back. She curled into herself, hugging her arms tightly across her own chest. Gibbs turned back to Shepard.

"You ok, Jethro?" Jen asked lightly. Gibbs gave her a smile and nodded.

"This was pretty personal, Jen, whoever did this knew that child's mother."

"Should be easier to catch then," Jen replied looking over Gibbs' shoulder at the girl. "What are you doing with the child?"

"McGee is looking for a relative. If none, social services."

"Keep me informed," she said and turned to walk away. Gibbs watched her retreating back for a moment before heading towards his desk.

He looked over at Tony and found the younger agent watching him. Upon realizing that Gibbs had spotted him, Tony ducked his eyes and listened intently to the phone. Gibbs looked at Nicole.

"I need to take you to the day care center," Gibbs said softly. He saw the fear expand in her eyes as she shrunk further into his chair. "It's just for a little while. I need to go talk to some people and I can't do that if I have to keep an eye on you," he said with a smile.

"I don't want to," she said softly.

"I know, but I promise it won't be for long," he said squatting down in front of her. She studied him a moment then slowly nodded. Gibbs smiled and stood. He waited for her to climb from the chair and join him. Once she was at his side he started towards the day care center.

They walked in silence to the room. As they neared they could hear the other children playing. When they came to the door Nicole scooted closer to Gibbs' hip. He pushed the door open and waited for her to go first. She didn't move. He looked down at her then stepped through the opening. Nicole followed close on his heels.

"Agent Gibbs," a lady called from the corner of the room. "Who is this?"

"This is Nicole. She needs to stay here for a little bit," Gibbs said. "Nicole, this is Judy. She's going to watch you until I can get back."

The girl continued to stare at the ground while clinging to Gibbs' arm. Judy watched the girl a moment before motioning for Gibbs to talk to her away from the girl. Gibbs peeled Nicole's hand from his arm. "Nicole, why don't you go sit down over there for a minute."

The girl nodded slowly and walked to a nearby table. She slid into the seat and laid her head in her arms. Gibbs watched for a moment before turning to Judy.

"How bad is it?"

"She saw her mother murdered," Gibbs said gravely. Judy watched him. "What?"

"Nothing. How long will she be here?"

"I need at least an hour. I got to talk to Ducky and work the case a little before I turn my agents loose."

"I'll do my best," Judy said with a smile.

"All I ask for," Gibbs replied as he walked back to Nicole. He put a hand softly on top of her head. She closed her eyes. "Nicole, I'll be back in about an hour."

"Promise?" she asked still not lifting her head.

"Yes, that's a promise," Gibbs said gently. She nodded her head, still cradled in her arms, and Gibbs smiled softly. He walked away, leaving her alone.

He first went down to see Ducky. He found the M.E. working on the mother's body. He walked up beside the older man and stopped. Staring at the damage done he felt like shuddering. He fought the urge off.

"What do we have, Duck?" he asked.

"What we have is a very brutal attack, Jethro. This woman was stabbed six times with a sharp triangular object. The attack was very personal. From the looks of the wounds the attacker not only thrust the object into this poor woman, he also turned it several inches several times on each wound. The COD was this one right here," Ducky said pointing to a wound over the heart.

"Can you identify the object used?"

"It's not your ordinary kitchen knife, Jethro, but it was a distinct object. This wound over her heart; he actually stuck the object in and twisted it while it penetrated her heart. It was the last wound he inflicted. She endured the pain of the others I'm afraid.

"The object had three edges, all sharp. Extremely sharp to do the damage I'm seeing. Two sides of it were smooth, but the third had a nick or piece missing. There seems to be a hitch in the cut every so often."

"Thanks, Ducky," Gibbs said turning to leave.

"If I find anything more I'll let you know," Ducky said as he leaned over the body once again. Gibbs left and made his way to Abby's lab. He ran into McGee before he could get there.

"Boss," McGee said with a grave look on his face.

"What is it, McGee?"

"I can't find a relative; we're going to have to call social services on this one."

"What do you mean?"

"Her mother was an only child, no siblings. Her grandparents on her mother's side are both deceased. Her father was killed in Somalia in ninety three. He had two brothers but when he was fifteen they both died in a house fire. His mother is dead and his father has Alzheimer's disease. I'm still looking but it's not looking good."

"What about a will, a family friend named, anything?"

"Not that I can find. She didn't have a will. And they've only been on base for a little over a week here. I'm checking on her last assignment to see if there was anyone there that can take the child but it was in California."

"Ok, make the call," Gibbs said feeling a little defeated. McGee nodded and scurried away for a phone. Gibbs continued to Abby's lab. He came up beside her quietly, making her jump slightly.

"Gibbs, didn't your mother ever tell you not to sneak up on people!" she said as he reached over and turned down the music.

"Apparently not. And besides, Abbs, if you wouldn't listen to the music so loud maybe you'd hear someone coming," he said. Abby gave him a glare before moving on.

"I suppose you're here to ask me what I have. Right?"

"Good guess."

"Well we have prints from the house. I have the mother's prints so I can exclude hers when I run then. The child's will be easier since they are small. I don't know how many foreigns I have yet. Also, there were two types of blood found at the crime scene. Most of the blood matches to our Victim, Johanna Conrad. But there is blood from another donor also found."

"Fresh?"

"Yes, most likely deposited the same time as the victim's blood was splashed."

"Keep on it, Abbs," he said as he walked from the lab.

"Always, Bossman."

Gibbs continued up to the bullpen and found Ziva and Tony bantering about something. He ignored the comments and simply slapped Tony on the back of the head as he walked by. Tony stopped in mid-sentence, his mouth hanging open and his eyes shut.

"Ow, Boss, what was that for?"

"For not being at work when I came in here," Gibbs grumbled.

"Right," Tony said rubbing his head. Gibbs reached over and grabbed the cup of coffee that was sitting on his desk. He took a mouthful and then spit it back into the cup, giving it a dirty look. It was cold. He tossed the cup into the garbage.

"Gibbs, we talked to a couple of the people on base over the phone and they said that the Commander hadn't really made friends yet. She was always cheerful when she was around, no one thought there was a problem," Ziva said quickly. Gibbs looked at the two of them for a moment.

"Go to the base and talk to them in person," Gibbs said. "Tony, the attack was very personal. Ducky said the man not only stabbed her but twisted the object as he stabbed. He was trying to inflict a lot of pain."

"I'll start checking into past relationships from previous posts," Tony said thoughtfully. Gibbs nodded. He checked his watch, time to go get Nicole.

"Go interview first," Gibbs said and when neither Ziva nor Tony moved he stood and glared at them. "Why are you still here?"

Both quickly gathered what they needed and bolted for the door. Gibbs rubbed his face and then headed towards the day care center. He came up to the door almost exactly an hour after he had left. Nicole saw him through the door and sat up a little at the table. He thought he almost saw a smile, but it never quite made it to her face.

"Told you I'd be back," Gibbs said with a smile as he sat down next to her. She nodded.

TBC…


	4. With You

**Chapter Four: With You**

Nicole looked up at him with sadness and he reached over and put his arm around her. She sunk deeper into him then and sniffled. Gibbs took a deep breath and looked around the room. So many other happy children were playing without a care in the world, but the one next to him had had her world ripped from her and shattered into a million pieces.

Gibbs looked up to see McGee standing in the doorway. McGee pointed to the hallway and Gibbs got up to join him. Nicole immediately stuck her hand out and grasped at Gibbs' wrist. Her fingers barely made it around. He stopped and looked at her.

"Don't go," she pleaded softly. Gibbs gave her a smile and a nod.

"Just for a minute, I have to talk to Tim in the hallway," Gibbs said softly patting her hand with his free one. She held on for a moment longer before her hand dropped to the table and she looked down.

Gibbs hurried out to the hallway and saw McGee with two women he didn't know. He walked up to his junior agent and waited for an explanation. McGee looked at the two women and then cleared his throat.

"Agent Gibbs, this is Helen Dumont and Carrie Allicks. They're here to pick up Nicole Conrad," McGee said. Gibbs felt the pain of reality that he was no longer going to be at this child's side. He didn't show it to the people in the hallway.

"Where is the child?" Helen asked him. Gibbs looked back into the room and pointed at Nicole. Helen walked around him and towards the child. Gibbs watched her.

"Agent Gibbs I just need you to sign some paperwork…" Carrie was saying as Gibbs continued to watch Helen and Nicole. Nicole started to get agitated and was crying again. Gibbs turned into the room.

"McGee, take care of it," he called over his shoulder as he hurried to Nicole's side. He came up beside her and placed a hand on her shoulder. "What's wrong, Nicole?"

"I don't want to go," she said between sobs.

Her small arms grasped tightly to his waist as he stood there staring at the social service rep. She was pursing her lips and staring at the child. Gibbs squatted down in front of Nicole removing her arms from his waist as he did.

"You do not have a choice in the matter, young lady," Helen said matter-of-factly. Gibbs glared up at her before turning a soft smile to Nicole.

"You have to go," he said gently.

"But I don't want to," she said with a heavy sigh. Gibbs pulled her close and gave her a tight hug. She wrapped her arms around him.

"There isn't anyone else, honey, you have to go with these people," he said soothingly. She started to sob against him.

"No," she chocked out. Gibbs let her cling to him, her arms holding onto each other deftly to keep in place.

"It's ok, she'll be better once we get her placed with a family," Helen said as she reached for the child. Nicole sensed her coming and her grip on Gibbs tightened. Helen tried to gently, at first, pry the child from Gibbs, but as Nicole fought harder and harder, Gibbs put an end to the social service agent's efforts.

He stood with the child still clinging to his neck and turned away from the startled Helen. She chased after him as he took her over to where McGee was handling the paperwork. He stopped and looked down at the documents about to turn custody over to the state.

"Stop, McGee," Gibbs said coldly. McGee almost dropped the pen. He looked up at his boss with a quizzical expression on his face.

"Boss?"

"Stop signing that stuff. She's staying in our custody."

"Agent Gibbs, you can NOT do…" Helen said walking up behind Gibbs. He spun quickly coming face to face, with only Nicole to separate them.

"Do NOT tell me what I CAN and can NOT do," Gibbs said through gritted teeth to the lady. She shrunk back from him and fought the urge to cower. McGee stood mouth agape staring at Gibbs. He dropped the pen this time.

Carrie stepped back from the group and alternated between staring at Gibbs and McGee. McGee didn't know what to do, so he stepped back from the paperwork and looked at Carrie. He simply shrugged his shoulders. Helen was still trying to recover her wits from Gibbs' verbal lashing.

Gibbs turned with Nicole still draped around his neck and headed towards the door, while McGee followed on his heels. Carrie stood dumbfounded at the turn of events, and after a few moments finally started to gather up the documents on the table. Helen chased after Gibbs and the girl.

"Agent Gibbs!" she hollered down the hallway after him. Gibbs ignored her and continued towards the elevator. McGee glanced back at the woman a few times, but didn't say anything, he knew better.

As they came to the elevator and the doors opened Gibbs saw Shepard standing there. He stepped on, avoiding eye contact as Nicole picked her head up slightly. McGee slipped onto the elevator and tried to make himself as small as possible in the corner.

"AGENT GIBBS!" the woman screamed down the hallway. This time Shepard heard it and as the doors were closing she reached out and hit the open door button. She looked at Gibbs.

"What's going on, Jethro?" Jen asked looking from Gibbs, to Nicole, to McGee. McGee was turning a light shade of red, Nicole was still clinging to Gibbs' neck, and Gibbs was glaring out the elevator doors at the woman racing towards him.

"Nothing, Jen," he said flatly. She was not convinced. Helen reached the elevator and was about to lay into Gibbs when Shepard spoke first.

"Can I help you?" she asked the stranger. Helen eyed the new red head suspiciously and then glared at Gibbs.

"You have no right to take this child…" Helen began before she was cut off by Shepard.

"Stop," Jen said and then turned to Gibbs. "Jethro, what is going on?"

"I said it's nothing, Jen," he said replied again looking her dead in the eyes. A small smile cracked her lips and she shook her head.

"Are you denying social services to take her?"

"She doesn't want to go, Jen."

"Jethro,"

"I'll take her. It's not a big deal," he said as he reached out and hit the close door button. The doors started to close leaving Helen in the hallway. Shepard hit the open door button. Gibbs let out an exasperated sigh and slid Nicole to the ground. The girl went willingly but clung to his waist.

"Jethro, she should go to protective custody with social services," Jen said. Gibbs gave her an icy look and simply reached out and hit the close door button. Helen reacted quickly and practically dove into the elevator with them. She bumped into McGee who stumbled further into the back of the elevator.

"She's protected enough with me," he said flatly. Both seemed to be ignoring Helen at this point, solely arguing with each other. The elevator didn't start moving so Gibbs reached across both Jen and Helen and hit the button.

"Jethro," Jen said sternly.

"No deal, Jen," he said and turned to face the front of the elevator. Helen went to protest and Shepard held up a hand. They rode down in silence and Gibbs was off the elevator as soon as the doors were opened far enough. He took Nicole to his desk.

McGee followed him closely trying to get distance between him and the two women following. Shepard managed to keep herself between Gibbs and Helen but it was very obvious that the other woman was not happy.

"Sit here," Gibbs said softly to Nicole, who then obediently climbed into his chair. "McGee watch her," he said as he turned back towards the stairs.

"Jethro, my office," Jen said taking hold of Helen's arm and turning her up the stairs.

The party of three walked into Shepard's office in silence and as the door closed Jen turned to Jethro. She looked at him for a moment, studying what she saw in his eyes. Helen had enough thought to keep her mouth shut at the moment.

"What?" Gibbs said with no emotion.

"What are you doing?" Jen asked.

"The girl doesn't want to go with these people, Jen, what's the difference if she goes with them or stays with me. She feels safer with me."

"Jethro, what is with you?"

"Nothing, that girl just saw her mother murdered, Jen, she's scared and she thinks she is alone in this world," Gibbs said managing to keep the calm, cool exterior of his usual demeanor, but on the inside he was fuming.

"Fine. I'll give you 48 hours with the girl, and then you turn her over," Jen said. Helen started to protest and Shepard silenced her with a look. Gibbs eyes never left Jen. He contemplated this new proposal.

"Ok," he said and left the office without another word. He could hear Helen protesting this decision but he didn't care, Jen could take care of it. He walked down to his desk and smiled. Nicole looked up at him.

"Do I have to go with those people?" she asked, new tears forming in her eyes.

"No, you can stay with me," Gibbs said with a smile. McGee looked over at Gibbs then at the stairs as Helen came down followed by Shepard. Helen gave a lingering glare towards Gibbs before she disappeared into the elevator.

The girl brightened for a second, before she turned sullen and frightened again. She tucked her legs under her as she sat in his chair. Gibbs knew, in that moment, this was one case they had to solve.


	5. The Interviews

**Chapter Five: The Interviews**

Tony and Ziva sat in a small room waiting. They had already interviewed five people each giving very little information. No one had gotten to know the Commander yet. They all said she seemed upbeat and cheery, but no one remembered a problem.

Now they waited for the commanding officer to come and talk to them. It would be their last interview of the day. Tony yawned and checked his watch again. After rolling his eyes he glanced at Ziva. She looked to be half asleep.

"Can you believe this?" Tony said with a sigh. "I mean what does Gibbs expect us to find?"

"You never know, Tony," Ziva said stretching her legs. "Gibbs is a strange man."

"We should be in California, that's where people knew this woman," Tony said as the door opened. He stood with a smile extending his hand to the officer that had just entered the room. Ziva stood and produced a large smile.

"Sorry to keep you waiting," the man said while taking Tony's hand. "I'm Captain Gerald Cooper."

"Captain Cooper, we just have a few questions for you. I'm Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, and this is Officer David," Tony said extending his hand out towards Ziva. She nodded slightly and then the trio sat around the table.

"This is such a tragic event," Captain Cooper said shaking his head.

"How well did you know the Commander," Ziva asked leaning forward on the table.

"Not well. She's been active on this base for about a week. They moved in about twelve days ago, her and her daughter," he replied with a slight shrug of his shoulders.

"Was there any problem with her?" Tony asked.

"How so?" the Captain replied.

"Her work, attitude, in how she handled herself," Ziva stated coolly.

"No, she was always on time, got what little she started on track, was cheerful the entire time she was here," he said clasping his hands on the table.

"How did she come to be assigned to this base?" Tony asked leaning back in his chair.

"One of our former JAG reps left the Navy to start a family. We put the position up for filling and we were immediately given her name."

"Define immediately," Ziva asked curiously.

"Less than two days."

"Is that strange?" Tony asked.

"Not really. It's the Navy. They reshuffle personnel all the time. She was probably due for a transfer."

"And she came in with no problem?"

"None what so ever. Like I said she was the perfect fill as far as I was concerned. Now…now I don't know what to do."

"Thank you for your time, Captain Cooper. Oh one more thing," Tony said as he stood from the table.

"Yes?"

"Did she have a relationship with anyone?"

"How so? You mean romantic? Not that I know of on base, you'll have to ask around the California base for that," Captain Cooper said standing up and nodding slightly.

"Thank you for your time," Ziva said with a smile. The Captain smiled and then exited the room. Tony looked over and Ziva and shook his head.

"That was a waste of time," Tony said as he gathered up his notes. Ziva smiled. "What?"

"You get to tell Gibbs that," she said with a smile as she exited the room. Tony stood for a moment with a smirk on his face before he hurried after her.

"No, I won't tell him that. I'll tell him that we need to go to California for more information, Zee-vaa," Tony said matter-of-factly. Ziva eye-balled him from the corner of her eye as her shoulders rose and fell in a subtle shrug.

"Suit yourself," Ziva said.

They made their way back to NCIS is silence. When they pulled into the parking lot Tony finally spoke. He looked over at Ziva as he put the car in park.

"Pack your bags, Ziva, we're going to California," he said with a toothy smile. Ziva shook her head and got out of the car. They walked up to the bullpen and found McGee sitting at his desk, the girl sitting at Gibbs' desk while Gibbs stood behind her. They also saw Director Shepard and two other women standing in the hallway waiting for the elevator.

"Boss," Tony said as he walked into the bullpen and smiled at Nicole. The girl ignored him.

"Yeah, DiNozzo," Gibbs grunted at him.

"Nothing going on base, need to go to Cali to speak to the old post," Tony said quickly. Ziva shook her head. Gibbs sighed. He then motioned for them to follow him, but first he told the girl he'd be right back. He then barked at McGee to watch over her. McGee nodded and gulped a breath.

Tony and Ziva followed Gibbs to an interrogation room. After they passed through the door he closed it. They sat awkwardly around the table before Gibbs broke the silence.

"What did you find?" Gibbs said sternly. Tony looked at him a moment before answering.

"No one knew her here, Boss, she was only active a week. Said that we'd be better off talking to people in California for past relationships that sort of thing," Tony replied.

"Captain Cooper told us that she was a dream post. He also said her name was given to him less than two days after the post became open," Ziva added.

"Why?"

"Why what?" Tony asked confused.

"He said the former JAG left the Navy to start a family. He doesn't know why Commander Conrad was chosen to replace her," Ziva replied quickly as Gibbs glared cut into Tony.

"Anything from anyone?"

"No, Boss. They all said she was on time, got her work in order, and was cheerful. That was everyone's take on her. But they only knew her a week," Tony said.

"Fine, Tony, take McGee and Ziva. Get to California and interview everyone that had contact with her there," Gibbs said standing sharply and heading for the door. Tony looked at Ziva and smiled pointing his finger at her. Ziva shook her head and followed Gibbs. Tony jumped up and fell in line. Tony went back to his desk quickly and booked three tickets to California on the computer before standing up suddenly.

"Probie!" Tony yelled as he popped up over his computer. McGee jumped. "Grab your stuff and pack your bags. You…are coming with us," Tony said with a smile as he grabbed what he needed and headed for the elevator.

"And where is that?" McGee asked Ziva as he walked up beside her.

"California," Ziva said.

"Oh," McGee said as he slung his backpack over his shoulder as the three disappeared on the elevator.

Behind the closed doors Tony was still smiling. He looked from Ziva to McGee. They both looked burdened by the trip. He shook his head.

"Come on, guys! We're going to California," Tony said enthusiastically.

Both McGee and Ziva looked up at Tony with skepticism. Tony shook his head and smiled wide, held out his hands, and clasped both on the shoulder roughly. McGee held his ground and Ziva glared up at Tony before taking a step away from him.

"Big deal, Tony," McGee replied as he shook his head and readjusted his backpack. Ziva sighed and then turned to face the doors so she could ignore Tony.

"All right, but I booked the tickets. So that means I get a window seat," Tony said like a kid calling shotgun. McGee shook his head in disgust as Ziva bit her lip as she stared at the doors, fighting a smile.

They each stopped at their lockers and picked up a change of clothes, not having time for each to reach home before their flight. They then proceeded to the airport where they made their way through security and onto the concourse. They found their gate and when the time came made their way on the jet and found their seats. Tony took the window, while Ziva sat in the middle seat, giving McGee the aisle.

The flight went smoothly, with Tony chatting the entire time. McGee tuned him out and caught some sleep while Ziva bantered with Tony. Ziva nudged McGee when they were about to land and he looked at her groggily before he realized what was happening. He simply nodded his thanks.

Once on the ground they made their way towards the car rental and secured a car for their stay, next the made their way to base to secure housing for their stay. Once that was taken care of they left their belongings in the rooms while they made their way to the JAG offices to start round two of the interviews. It was late in the afternoon in California so they would be able to complete at least a few before the day was over.

TBC…


	6. Dealing with the Monsters

**Chapter Six: Dealing with the Monsters**

Gibbs was enjoying the quiet in the bullpen. He glanced at Nicole sitting at McGee's desk and then looked at the clock. He should get her out of here. He gathered what he needed and slowly walked to her. She looked up at him with sad eyes when he came up beside her.

"Ready to get out of here?" Gibbs asked squatting down next to her. She nodded slowly, tears filling but not falling in her eyes. He put a gentle hand on her shoulder and then slowly stood. She followed him, and as they got in the elevator Gibbs told her they needed to talk to a few people before they left. Nicole simply stared at the closed elevator doors.

First stop was Abby's lab. Nicole followed closely on Gibbs' heals as they passed through the doors and the loud music assaulted their ears. Gibbs came up behind Abby and tapped her on the shoulder, causing her to jump. Nicole covered her ears with her hands.

"Your little friend doesn't like Plastic Death," Abby said with a smile as she reached over and killed the music. Nicole's hands dropped suddenly. Gibbs smiled. "What can I do for you, bossman?"

"I'm leaving for the day, Abbs, probably working from home tomorrow. You'll be able to reach me with the cell," Gibbs said. Abby nodded as her gaze landed on Nicole.

"Ok. I'll be sure to call if something comes up," Abby said with a smile. "Should be fun, day without the boss around."

"Well if you can have fun with Ducky, be my guest," Gibbs said. Abby gave him a confused look and Gibbs' shoulders rose and fell. "DiNozzo, Ziva, and McGee are all in San Diego."

"San Diego? Since when?" Abby whined.

"I sent them there a couple hours ago. That's where the case is, Abby," Gibbs said as he looked over a Nicole. He noticed the girl's face fall at the mention of San Diego. "Abbs, can you hang with Nicole a minute? I need to talk to Ducky before I leave."

"Sure thing, Bossman," Abby said with a smile. Nicole eyed her suspiciously as Gibbs nodded. The girl looked at Gibbs with a strained look.

"I just need to talk to Ducky before we leave. But you have to stay here, I'll be right back I promise," Gibbs said gently. Nicole took a deep breath and looked at the ground. Gibbs turned slowly and left Nicole and Abby in the lab.

He walked to the morgue and found Ducky over a body, with Palmer assisting him. Gibbs walked up next to Ducky and looked over at what Ducky was doing. The M. E. was removing a liver.

"Ah, Jethro, what can I do for you?" Ducky asked as he plopped the chunk of meat on the scale. Gibbs looked over at the body of Commander Conrad before he answered Ducky.

"I'm taking off for the day. Nicole's staying with me so most likely I'll work from home tomorrow. I'll have the cell. Rest of the team is in San Diego," Gibbs said as Palmer continued to remove internal organs from the body. Ducky was turned facing Gibbs now.

"Nicole is the young one?" Ducky asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yes," Gibbs said flatly.

"She's staying with you, not child services?" Ducky questioned.

"Long story, Duck. I'll be home tomorrow," Gibbs said turning briskly and heading toward the doors.

"I think we'll manage without you," Ducky said softly as the doors swished closed. Gibbs didn't hear him. Gibbs made his way back to the lab and was greeted by a relieved Nicole. Abby was a little disappointed that she couldn't connect with the girl but Gibbs simply shrugged. Nicole tightened her grip on Gibbs' arm.

They arrived at Gibbs' house a short time later. He led Nicole in through the front door and she stood quietly in the middle of the living room looking around. Gibbs went into the kitchen to check for food content and found he had some chicken and potatoes. He set everything out to cook.

He came back to the living room and was going to ask Nicole if she liked chicken when he noticed the strange look on her face. He watched as the girl scanned the room twice more and frowned. Gibbs leaned against the door jamb.

"What?" he asked. Nicole turned her head, looking over her shoulder back at him. She bit at her lip a minute then looked around the room again. When her gaze landed back on Gibbs she finally spoke.

"It doesn't look like anyone lives here," she said with a frown. Gibbs looked around at his home and nodded. "You don't even have a TV."

"Yeah, this part doesn't look like much. I…well I don't use this part that much," Gibbs said with a shrug.

"Don't use it much?"

"I really live in my basement. Just come up here to eat…and sleep…on occasion," Gibbs said with a smile on his face as he looked around. Nicole gave him a skeptical look.

"Why would you spend all your time in the basement?" she asked.

"That's where my boat is, and that is where you'll find the TV," Gibbs said with a wink.

"There's a boat in your basement?" Nicole asked with disbelief. Gibbs laughed.

"Yes, but first, how about chicken for dinner," Gibbs said crossing his arms over his chest. Nicole gave him a small smile and he felt like he had lifted a barrier. The girl slowly nodded.

Gibbs turned and made his way back to the kitchen as Nicole continued to look around the upstairs. Gibbs quickly fixed up the chicken and stuck it in the oven. He then started on the potatoes. After forty five minutes the food was ready. He called Nicole into the kitchen, and she slid quietly into a chair at the table as he put a plate down in front of her. He then pulled out a glass.

"Sorry, Kido, but I wasn't expecting anyone. All I got is water," Gibbs said as he filled her cup from the tap. She just nodded and picked at the chicken with her fork. Gibbs fixed his own plate and sat down next to her. They ate in silence. Once they were both done Gibbs quickly rinsed the dishes off and placed them in the sink. He then turned and looked at Nicole sitting at the table watching him.

"Now what?" she asked sadly. Gibbs could tell she was trying hard not to think about what happened. Gibbs walked over to the table and sat down again. He knew he needed to ask her some questions he just hoped now was the right time.

"Nicole, we need to talk about what happened," Gibbs said gently. The girl stiffened and shifted away from him, trying to hold her tears in check. "I know you don't want to, and that this will be hard, but we have to."

"Ok," she said softly. Gibbs nodded.

"I need to know what you saw when you came out of your room," Gibbs continued. Nicole stared hard at the table and pulled at the hem of her left sleeve with her right fingers. "Did you see or hear anything?"

"Yes," Nicole said in a barely audible whisper.

"Did you see who hurt your mom?"

"No," she said as the tears started to run down her cheeks. "I was doing my homework. They were yelling but I don't know why. I went to see, I left my room and when I looked…he…he was…he was hurting her," she finished. Gibbs reached out and laid his arm along her shoulders.

"You didn't see the man's face?" Gibbs prodded.

"No, his back was too me," she said as her breathing became shaky from the tears. She fought hard to control them.

"You didn't recognize his voice? Maybe someone you knew from California, or somewhere else maybe?"

"No," she said roughly. Gibbs nodded. He pulled her close to him and she buried herself in his chest and cried. Her small body shook with her sobs as she grieved for her mother, letting the pain of what she saw out. Gibbs rubbed her back gently and held her close, letting her expel what she needed too.

Finally the tears slowed and she regained control over her breathing. She pulled back from him and looked around. Gibbs kept his arm around her shoulders. She got up then, and Gibbs arm dropped loosely to his side. She grabbed a napkin and blew her nose before she attempted a smile. Gibbs then stood.

"Want to go watch TV?" he asked. Nicole simply nodded. He smiled and led the way to the basement as the girl hung closely to him. She stood on the bottom step and stared at his boat for a full minute once they were down the stairs. Gibbs looked around for the remote and finally found it under a pile of papers. He handed it to her as she looked up at him.

"That's your boat?" she asked.

"Yep," Gibbs said as he ran his hand along one of the ribbings.

He thought she was going to say more, but she didn't. She simply took the remote and headed for the couch and plopped heavily onto the cushion, sending a volcano of dust cascading all around her. She waved her hand through the air rapidly trying to disperse what she could. She looked at Gibbs and he chuckled before picking up the plane sander and turning his attention to his boat.

He had been working on the boat for a few hours, and at the beginning the channels on the TV had been flipping constantly as she tried to find something to watch. Eventually the flipping slowed, and then stopped entirely. The channel had been constant for quite a while now and Gibbs glanced over his shoulder at Nicole. She was curled into a small ball at one end of the couch sleeping. He noticed then he was getting pretty tired himself and laid down under the ribbing of the boat after he clicked the television off.

Gibbs was dreaming. He knew he was but it didn't make it any less real. The pain felt real, the ache felt sincere. He dreamed of dead loved ones that night, much like most nights as of late. He dreamed of Kate, killed in the line of duty, protecting him, he dreamed of Shannon his first wife, and Kelly his daughter, both taken from him suddenly, he dreamed of fallen comrades, he dreamed of Commander Conrad. He saw their faces in his dream, haunting him, chasing him, guilting him. Then he heard the scream. It vibrated through his head, echoed in his ears, bounced around his brain.

It was loud enough to sit him straight up, bringing him out of the dead sleep. As his head came forward it met with the ribbing of the boat. Pain exploded over his right eye as the board stopped his movement, shoving his head backwards at the same speed it had come forward. He was too asleep to stop the movement and his head hit the plywood base with a smack. He winced.

His head spun and stung, and his eye ached. He slid himself slowly to the end of the plywood slat and got to his feet. His head throbbed but he didn't have much time to dwell on the issue. Another scream brought him the rest of the way out of slumber and crashed through the haze caused by hitting his head. He walked quickly to the couch, stumbling once around the coffee table, catching two toes on the leg. He swore under his breath, but his attention was on the small sleeping form on the couch.

He sat down next to her and put his hand on Nicole's shoulder. The second his hand came in contact with the girl she sat bolt up right, her hands coming up in defense of her body. The crashed hard into Gibbs' chest, her breathing was fast and erratic. She was disoriented, having no clue to where she was. Gibbs could tell she was terrified.

"Shhh, Kelly, it's ok," Gibbs soothed as he pulled her to him. Finally her brain registered where she was, and why. She clung to Gibbs tightly and let out a sob. "I promise it's ok."

Nicole pulled back from him and took a deep breath. He released his grip a little and she looked up at him with a quizzical look. She was about to say something when her attention was drawn to open wound on his forehead. She reached up and brushed just over his right eye. Gibbs felt the sting as her fingers came in contact with the skin. He instinctively put his own hand up to stop her movements. He touched it gingerly and pulled his fingers back, they were red.

He shook his head slowly, but even that movement caused it to throb more. He closed his eyes for a moment to clear his mind then opened them again. Nicole was staring at him. He took a deep breath of his own.

"You ok?" Gibbs asked gently as he kept a hand on her shoulder.

"It was a bad dream," she whispered, as if raising her voice would make the demons come back and the dream would be a reality.

"Want to talk about it?" Gibbs asked. Nicole shook her head vehemently. "Sometimes it helps to talk about bad dreams."

"No," she said with a slightly shaky voice. Gibbs nodded and stroked her hair. Nicole pulled her legs to her chest and wrapped her arms around her knees. "Is your head ok?"

"I banged it pretty good," Gibbs said getting up from the couch. Nicole followed him with her eyes, continuing to clamp her knees to her chest. He got a wash cloth from the cabinet and dipped it in the water Nicole had brought downstairs with her. He dabbed at his head and winced.

He then felt the back of his head for damage. There was a pretty good bruise forming but no blood on the rear. He then glanced down at his toes; they were both still attached and to him looked like they were in the correct place.

"What did you do to it?" she asked quietly, still watching him as he cleaned up the blood on his forehead. Gibbs glanced over at the boat and smiled at the ribbing.

"Hit it on that when I sat up," Gibbs said pointing to the boat. Nicole followed his fingers.

"Why were you under there?"

"Sleeping," Gibbs said looking back at the girl. She scrunched her face in confusion. "I sleep under there a lot, it's not something new," Gibbs said with a shrug.

"So you live in your basement, building a boat, and that's all you do here?" Nicole asked stifling a yawn.

"Pretty much," Gibbs said with a smile. Nicole smiled back at him but it quickly vanished, before she yawned. Gibbs closed his eyes for a moment before looking at her again. She stared at him and licked her lips. Her throat was a little dry from the sawdust in the air. She looked at the floor.

"You called me Kelly," she said softly. Her gaze slowly came up to meet Gibbs'. When she got there she was met with a distant stare. She saw the pain in his eyes and the fear there too, but then it was gone and he was looking at her again.

"I did?" Gibbs asked trying to hide his discomfort. Nicole let her knees go as she sat forward on the couch.

"When you woke me up."

Gibbs turned his eyes to the floor as he thought about the slip. He knew this could happen; it was part of the reason why he had wanted to keep her instead of sending her to child services earlier today. He looked back up at her.

"Why didn't you want to go with the child services lady today?" Gibbs asked. Nicole stared at him a moment slightly confused.

"I…she told me that I was going to go to a home for orphans. That I would be put with other kids like me. I…that I would live in a foster home," Nicole said with her voice full of sadness. "She didn't care that my mom had just died. She didn't care that I didn't have anyone left."

"I'm sure she did," Gibbs said coming closer and sitting on the other end of the couch. Nicole looked up at him.

"She wouldn't find my mom's killer, she probably wouldn't even tell me when he's caught," Nicole said a hint of anger coming through in her voice. Gibbs waited her out to see if she would continue. Finally she did. "I was just another number to her. But to you…you knew what I felt. You would help find who killed my mom. You…you understood the pain I was feeling."

She looked at him with sad eyes staring into the center of his soul. He felt the tears coming to his own eyes as her eyes welled up and spilled over. She wiped hurriedly as they rolled down her cheeks, but there were too many, and she wasn't quick enough. Eventually she gave up as the tears streaked down her face. Gibbs bit his lip to keep himself in check and simply nodded to the girl. She pulled her knees up, buried her face between them, and then covered it all with her arms. Gibbs scooted to her side of the couch and wrapped his arms around her small body and pulled her tightly to his side. He stroked her hair gently and waited until she was done crying again. This time he couldn't hold his own tears and a few rolled down his cheeks in grievance for the child sitting next to him.

TBC…


	7. California

**Chapter Seven: California**

Tony, Ziva, and McGee were standing in the bullpen of the JAG for the San Diego Naval station. Tony looked around while Ziva and McGee stood impatiently. It seemed that a good deal of the people were not in the office today. Tony walked up to a desk.

"Can I help you?" an Ensign asked Tony. Tony flashed the million dollar smile and leaned down on the desk.

"Yeah, we're here from NCIS from Washington and we need to speak to some people about Lt. Commander Johanna Conrad," Tony said plainly.

"But Lt. Commander Conrad transferred, she isn't here," the ensign said confused.

"What's your name?" Tony asked pointing to the young man.

"Ensign Gabe Glousten," he replied suspiciously.

"Listen, Ensign Glousten," Tony continued. "We know she isn't here. We need to speak to the commanding officer here."

"Has Commander Conrad done something wrong?"

"No she didn't, but someone else did. Now is your commanding officer in or not?" Tony asked getting a little annoyed with the ensign. Ziva walked up next to him at that moment.

"Problem, DiNozzo?" she asked.

"Nope," Tony said with a smile as his gaze remained on the ensign. Glousten picked up the phone and called someone. Tony stood up and nodded. McGee joined the two by the desk. Glousten finally put the handset of the phone down and looked up at them.

"The Admiral isn't in anymore, but Commander Betz will talk to you. She's just through that door," Ensign Glousten said pointing to an oak door behind him. Tony nodded, flashing another smile and then the three of them rounded the desk and Tony led them through the door.

"How can I help you," a woman asked them as they came through the door, McGee sliding it shut behind him. Tony walked up to the woman and extended his hand, while Ziva came up beside him.

"I'm Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo," he said shaking the commander's hand once before pointing towards Ziva. "And this is Officer David and Special Agent Timothy McGee."

"Commander Marie Betz," the woman replied. "Again how can I help you?"

"We are here from Washington. NCIS is investigating the death of Lt. Commander Conrad and we'd like to ask some questions of you and your staff," Tony continued. The commander's face fell.

"Wait, Johanna is dead?" she said with a shaky voice. McGee and Ziva both nodded while Tony took a step closer.

"I'm afraid so."

"When?"

"This morning," Ziva replied.

"Someone killed her?"

"Yes," Tony replied.

"My lord," Betz breathed out. There was a moment of silence in the room as Commander Betz absorbed the information. She then seemed to mentally shake herself back into professional mode. "Certainly. You have access to anyone in the office you need. The Admiral will be back tomorrow morning."

"Where can we set up for interviews?" Tony asked.

The commander thought for a moment then looked up at them, "there is a briefing room you can use. Follow me."

Commander Betz led them from her office and around Ensign Glousten's desk. They then crossed the bullpen and were taken through another large oak door. Inside was a room with a long table, lined on both sides with chairs.

"This will work just fine," Tony said. "Can we start with you?"

"Certainly," Commander Betz said sitting down softly in one of the chairs. The other three all took seats and the interview began.

"How well did you know Lt. Commander Conrad?" Tony asked.

"I was friends with Johanna. We worked together for two years here."

"Do you know why she wanted to transfer?" Ziva asked.

"It was sudden. She came to me one day and said she needed to leave California. I tried to push further, asked her why. I denied her request that day. She wouldn't give me a good reason for a transfer and I needed her here. She was a damn good lawyer. She came to me again two weeks later," Commander Betz replied.

"Did she give you a reason then?" Tony prompted.

"Sort of," Commander Betz replied thinking back to the conversation.

"Sort of?" McGee asked.

"She told me she had a personal problem with someone on base and that she needed a transfer for the safety of her daughter. I asked her what was going on but she wouldn't tell me more at that point. My lord, could this be related?"

"We don't know, Ma'am," Tony said sincerely. "What else did she tell you?"

"I told her I would put in for the transfer. Two days later I went to her house to talk to her."

"And?" Ziva pushed.

"She strayed away from the subject but I kept putting us back on task. All I could get from her was that she just wasn't happy and that there was someone on base that was making it difficult for her to raise her daughter here the way she wanted to and that she needed to leave the area."

"Did she ever say who?" Tony asked.

"No."

"Was she seeing anyone?" Ziva tossed into the verbal fire.

"I don't think so, but Johanna was a very private person. I think she may have been seeing someone a couple months ago but as of lately she hadn't said anything," Commander Betz said with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Any other problems she had, maybe family or friends?"

"She didn't have family aside from Nicole. My lord, Nicole. She's not…"

"No, she is alive. We have her in custody now," McGee said reassuring the Commander. Betz let out of sigh of relief.

"You were saying?" Ziva prodded to get Commander Betz back to her original train of thought. The commander looked at Ziva a moment before shaking her head.

"Oh, yes, I was saying that Johanna only had her daughter. She didn't have any other family. Her husband died almost 13 years ago in Somalia, and there weren't any brothers or sisters. Her parents are dead and Nicole's other grandparents I don't know but were out of the picture."

"What about friends, any disputes or arguments with friends?" Ziva asked.

"Not that I know of. Johanna mostly was friends with people here at the office. I guess her neighbors would know more," Betz said with a nod.

"Ok, I think that's all we have for you right now," Tony said with a smile. "If you could send someone else in for us that would be great."

"I will," Commander Betz said standing up and turning for the door. "I can't believe Johanna is dead."

Once the Commander was out of the room Tony turned to Ziva and McGee. They both stared at him. "What do you make of that?"

"Sounds like Commander Conrad had a problem with someone on base. We need to find out who, could be related," Ziva said. Tony nodded thoughtfully.

"Running half way cross the country when you have a child means she really wanted to get away from who ever it was. I say we need to look into that," McGee replied.

"Same here," Tony said as the door opened and Ensign Glousten walked in. He looked nervous and Tony flashed him a smile while pointing to a chair for him to sit in. Glousten sat down and wrung his hands on the table top.

"Commander Betz told me you wanted to talk to me about Commander Conrad," he said, a hint of sadness in his voice. Ziva and Tony both nodded.

"How well did you know Commander Conrad?" Tony asked starting the ball rolling.

"I worked with her here. That was about it. She was a good lawyer, friendly."

"Would you consider yourself her friend?" Ziva asked.

"I guess. It was more like co-workers though. We didn't talk much unless we needed too. She was always so busy with her cases and when the Admiral is in I'm pretty busy too," Glousten said as he began to relax a little.

"So you didn't talk much besides work stuff?" McGee continued.

"Well sometimes we small talked; I mean everyone does that in the office. But if you mean we shared our personal lives with each other no. We ran in different circles."

"Was Commander Conrad having problems with anyone in the office?" Tony asked.

"Not that I was aware of. It was a pretty big shock when the announcement was made that she was transferring. She always seemed cheerful in the office and friendly with everyone."

"Was there a case that she was working on that might have prompted her to leave?" Tony continued.

"How so?" Ensign Glousten asked confused.

"Maybe something too close to her, maybe she was threatened?" Ziva asked.

"Not that I know of, but I wouldn't really know. I'm not involved with that aspect of the office. I primarily just work for the Admiral or Commander Betz."

"Do you know if Commander Conrad was seeing someone on base?" McGee asked.

"You mean like dating? I wouldn't know. Like I said we didn't share our personal lives and we ran in different circles," Ensign Glousten said with a shrug.

"Thanks, Gabe, could you have Commander Betz send someone else in?" Tony said pointing to the door. Glousten nodded and stood as he opened the door he turned back.

"I'll tell her but you're going to run into people leaving for the day now," Glousten said.

"Not a problem, just see if we can catch at least one if not two more people today and then we'll come back in the morning," Tony said winking at the ensign. Glousten nodded and left the room.

This time the three sat in silence as they waited for the next person to come in. It was a few minutes before a woman walked in and took the seat in front of them. She smiled sweetly at Tony who returned it. Ziva rolled her eyes and McGee just ignored it.

"Hi, I'm Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, NCIS," Tony said.

"Lt. j. g. Michelle Pearce," she said with a smile.

"Do you know why you are here?" Ziva asked breaking the connection between Tony and Pearce. The woman turned her head and looked at Ziva before answering.

"Commander Betz told me it's about Commander Conrad," the woman said nodding her head.

"How would you classify your relationship with Lt. Commander Conrad," Ziva said.

"We worked together a lot and I guess we could be considered friends."

"How good of friends," McGee asked.

"We talked but not a lot. She was a private person. She didn't talk much about out of the office aside from Nicole."

"Did you know if she was seeing anyone on base?" Tony asked with a smile.

"She never said. But I think she would be pretty private about a relationship," Michelle said returning Tony's smile.

"How so?" Ziva asked annoyed.

"She just didn't talk much about stuff like that," Pearce said with a scowl.

"Was there a case that she found threatening?" McGee asked.

"Not that I know of. I worked pretty close with her on cases as second chair. She had a handle on them all, nothing to major."

"Thank you for your time, please have Commander Betz send someone else in," Ziva said with a sigh. Pearce smiled at Tony again he returned it as she got up and walked from the room. Tony's eyes followed her out and Ziva kicked him under the table.

"What?" Tony asked rubbing his shin.

"Stop ogaring," Ziva said shaking her head. McGee laughed out loud drawing a confused look from Ziva.

"It's ogling, Ziva," McGee said with a smile. Ziva smiled back and nodded.

"My apologies, Tony, stop ogling," Ziva replied. Tony glared at them both, but didn't say anything as a new person came through the doors. Tony checked his watch and quickly converted the time to California time. This would be there last interview for the day.

"I'm Lt. Commander Dietrich Blake," the man said with a nod as he sat down. Ziva and McGee both smiled but Tony's scowl remained on his face.

"Lt. Commander Blake, do you know why we are here?" Ziva asked. The man nodded a sad look crossing his face. "How well did you know Lt. Commander Conrad?"

"We were pretty good friends," Blake said with a sad smile. "We both came to this office two years ago, she stared the week after I did so we sort of latched onto each other as the newbies, formed a pretty good friendship."

"Did she confide in you?" Tony asked sitting up a little in the chair.

"Depends on what you want to know. She was a pretty private person. Nicole was the center of her life and she didn't want things to affect her so she would keep two separate lives essentially," Blake continued.

"How so?" McGee asked.

"She would talk to me about her troubles. I know she was seeing someone on base a couple months back but she wouldn't ever tell me who. I think he was a commanding officer and she didn't want to get in trouble."

"Did she think you would tell on her?" Ziva asked.

"Oh no, Ma'am. She just didn't want to say it out loud I think. If she was careful and kept the name inside less chance of others finding out I think."

"Did you have a guess as to who it was?" Tony asked.

"Does this have to do with her death?" Blake asked with a confused look on her face.

"It could," Tony replied with a nod. Blake looked a little shocked and then thought about the question.

"I had some suspicions but I never knew who it was no. She wouldn't tell me."

"How did the relationship end?" McGee asked sitting back in his chair.

"Not good. I remember her coming in one morning just frazzled. She was nervous and stressed. I cornered her in the coffee room and tried to pry the information out of her but she kept throwing the age old lawyer excuse in my face," Blake said with a shrug.

"What's that?" Ziva asked.

"She had to go to court," Blake said with a smile. Ziva nodded.

"Did you push the subject further?" McGee asked.

"Yes. That night we had dinner together. I pushed her on it. Told her it wouldn't go any further. She wouldn't give his name but she said it ended in a bad argument and that she didn't know if she could continue to work on this base. I told her she should ask for a transfer. And she did. She finally got one and then…" his voice trailed off as he thought of her fate. Ziva watched as his eyes clouded over with grief before he quickly shook his head and looked up at them with a forced smile.

"You said you had your speculations of who this man could be," McGee said.

"It was only speculation and I won't name names without proof, Agent, I'm sorry but I can't ruin someone else's career because I had a hunch," Blake said.

"Gibbs would," Ziva mumbled drawing smiles from both McGee and Tony. Blake stared at her blankly.

"Thank you for your time, Commander Blake," Tony said.

"Can I ask something?" Blake asked leaning forward in his chair.

"Sure," Tony said sitting back in his chair to put distance between them.

"What happens to Nicole?"

Tony looked at Ziva before looking back at Commander Blake. "Right now she is in the custody of NCIS. After the case is over with she will most likely go to child services and into foster care."

Ziva saw the sadness in Commander Blake's eyes. "There or here or where?"

"Most likely in the state of Virginia or in the city of Washington DC, where ever the closest opening is," McGee said.

"Would it be possible to send her out here?" Blake asked with a glint of hope in his eye. Tony and Ziva looked at each other before looking back at him.

"If someone put in a request maybe," McGee answered with a nod. Blake nodded in return and got up from the table. He was out the door and Ziva got up and closed it. She returned to her seat and they sat in silence for a moment.

"I think this relationship is the key," Tony said tapping his finger on the table.

"It's a strong lead," Ziva agreed. "We need to find out who this mystery person was. Someone has to know."

"We can start on that tomorrow," McGee said standing up and stretching.

"McGee you start on that while Ziva and I finish these interviews tomorrow. I think we should get two rooms tomorrow split up and make this go a little faster," Tony replied.

"Sounds like a deal," Ziva said.

"Plan, Ziva," Tony said as he stood gathering up the files they had brought with them.

"What ever," Ziva said helping him.

TBC…


	8. The Need to Let Go

**Chapter Eight: The Need to Let Go**

The silence around them was comforting. Nicole was pressed tightly to his side as he sat on the battered couch in his basement. He looked down at the child to find her asleep again, still clinging to his arm. Gibbs sat content, watching her sleep, hoping the monsters stayed at bay for the rest of the night, knowing he wouldn't sleep anymore tonight; it was simply a matter of fact.

Eventually his arm began to fall asleep as her weight pushed against it. He gently pulled it from her grasp and shifted away from the sleeping child. He stood and made his way quietly up the stairs fetching a pillow and blanket from the spare bedroom. He brought it down and gently pushed the pillow under her head, before covering her with the blanket. He picked up the plane sander and started to caress the boat once again.

A couple hours later Gibbs found himself still sanding. He would stop every so often and check on Nicole. The girl had slept with little fuss the rest of the night. Gibbs looked at the clock and began to feel the hunger that came with the morning. He also noticed he needed a shower after working on the boat all night. He ran his hand through his hair and sawdust cascaded to the floor. He shook his head and more dust exploded into the air, reflecting in the low light.

He decided he could leave her for a short while and made his way quietly upstairs. After quickly showering he changed into a fresh pair of jeans and a green Marine t-shirt. Gibbs then made his way into the kitchen and began to prepare a breakfast of eggs and bacon. As he finished each item he set them on the table, and then got down two plates from the cupboard. He also filled a glass of water and placed it in front of Nicole's plate. The coffee machine was done so he filled his mug, placing it in front of his own plate. He then made his way downstairs and found Nicole still asleep.

"Hey," Gibbs said gently putting a hand on her shoulder. She tensed and opened her eyes, taking a moment to gain her bearings and realize where she was. She stared up at him.

"What?" she asked groggily. Gibbs smiled.

"Time for breakfast. Come on," Gibbs said turning and heading back up the stairs. Nicole sat up and blinked as she watched him disappear up the stairs. "It's gonna get cold, come on!" he yelled as he reached the door and was gone into the living room.

Nicole sighed and tossed the blanket to the other end of the couch. She stared at it trying to remember when she covered up, she couldn't. She then got up and stretched as she trudged up the steps. She yawned and wiped at her eyes as she came into the kitchen. The smell perked her senses up and she smiled when she saw the table. Gibbs was already sitting in his chair eating.

"Dig in, it's going to get cold," he said between bites. Nicole sat in the chair and began to eat. They ate in a silence that both found comfort in. It was enough to know that the other was there; they didn't need to fill it with needless conversation. Nicole thought about the nightmare she had the night before and then the way Gibbs had comforted her after.

Gibbs knew Nicole was suffering. He knew he would need to occupy her mind today. She didn't need to dwell on the issues at hand. He still wanted to talk to her about the nightmare, but wasn't sure how to breach the subject. Once she was done eating she placed her plate and glass in the sink and made her way back down to the television. Gibbs let her go; he had other things to get done, like calling his team in California.

He grabbed the cell and flipped it open. After recalling Tony's number he punched the send button and held the phone to his ear. It rang several times before going to his voice mail. Gibbs left a short curt message telling Tony to call him. He called up McGee's number up and pushed send. It rang several times before the line connected.

"Hello, Gibbs," McGee said sounding sluggish. "We were going to call you."

"Well I beat you to the punch, McGee, what do you got?" Gibbs asked.

"We completed a few interviews last night. We spoke to Commander Betz who is second in command for the JAG office here. Also spoke with the Ensign that clerks for the Admiral. Ah, a Lt. Commander Blake who knew Commander Conrad. Also a Lieutenant jg that worked second chair with the Commander."

"And?"

"Um, we found out she may have been in a relationship with someone on the base that ended badly, but nobody seemed to know with who," McGee fumbled trying to remember everything that happened. He wondered why Gibbs had called him and not Tony.

"What else?" Gibbs asked gruffly.

"We're going to continue interviews today, Tony and Ziva are going to split up and try to speed them up. I'm going to dig into the Commander's life on base and try to come up with a name to our mystery guy," McGee said quickly. He walked out into the hallway and kicked open Tony's door. Tony rolled over in his bed and eyed McGee. McGee mouthed Gibbs and Tony sat up straight and raised an eyebrow. Tony grabbed for his cell and checked the screen. He swore under his breath when he noticed a missed call.

"DiNozzo up now?" Gibbs asked. McGee pulled the phone from his ear and looked at it as if Gibbs could see though it then put it back to his ear.

"Ah, yeah, boss," McGee stammered.

"Give him your phone, McGee," Gibbs said evenly.

"Yes, Boss," McGee said and held the phone out. Tony shook his head and sat back. McGee held it out again and glared at Tony.

"Take the phone!" they both heard Gibbs' voice come through the speaker. Tony groaned and then grabbed the phone from McGee, glaring at the younger agent as he did.

"DiNozzo here, Boss," Tony said quickly.

"Next time answer your phone," Gibbs said flatly.

"Right, Boss," Tony replied. "Things are going good here. We got in early enough to interview…"

"I know, McGee already told me. Now you finish the interviews and call me when you are done," Gibbs said.

"Right, Boss," Tony said with a deep breath.

"I'm at home so call my cell, I'm not going to the office today," Gibbs said.

"Ah, ok, why?" Tony asked confused. He regretted asking the second it was from his mouth. He could almost feel the anger from Gibbs coming through the phone.

"Don't ask stupid questions, DiNozzo," Gibbs said taking a sip of his coffee. "Just reach me by cell."

"Right, Boss," Tony said cheerfully into the phone. McGee raised an eyebrow but Tony ignored him. Ziva came up behind McGee and pushed her way around him into the room. Tony glared and pointed for her to leave. He was waiting for Gibbs to continue but then realized that he was holding a dead line to his ear. He checked the readout screen to make sure then closed the phone and tossed it to McGee.

"Problems?" Ziva asked.

"Just a cranky boss," Tony said standing up and dialing into his voicemail. He listened to the message, cringing, and then deleted it. He then looked at the clock. He shook his head. It may have been seven in the morning in Washington but it was only four in the morning in San Diego. Even though they were accustomed to the Washington time table, they had stayed up last night working on California time.

"Nothing new," Ziva said with a shrug. McGee stared at her and fought the smile creeping over his lips. Tony looked down.

"I'm going back to bed," Tony said with a yawn. "We were up late last night. We can't do anything here anyway for another four hours or so."

"Just answer your phone next time," McGee said as he walked past Ziva and out the door.

"Yeah thanks for the tip, Probie," Tony shouted after him. Ziva shook her head and left Tony alone.

Gibbs closed the phone and looked around. He didn't have anything to do. He decided to join Nicole in the basement and watch TV with her. When he came down the steps she smiled up at him and clicked to a new station.

"You ever just pick one?" Gibbs asked sitting down next to her. She looked at him a moment before she raised the remote and changed stations again.

"Not when it's only news on," she said with a small shrug. Gibb smiled. "Sucks you don't have a VCR or DVD player."

"I don't watch movies," Gibbs said.

"Lame," Nicole said with a smile. Gibbs glanced at her sideways before a smile cracked his lips.

"When I'm here I generally have CNN on when I'm working on the boat."

"CNN? That's horrible," Nicole said dramatically. Gibbs looked over at her and laughed. She covered her face in mock horror. "Who watches CNN?"

"I do," Gibbs said, pulling the remote from her grasp and clicking back to the CNN morning news report. She glared at him and yanked the remote back changing the station to the Cartoon Network.

"No CNN," Nicole said with a scowl. Gibbs grinned and reached around and tickled her causing her to lose her grip on the remote. He snatched it back and put CNN back on. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"CNN," Gibbs said pointing to the TV. His grin was wide. Nicole stared at him for a moment as Gibbs pointedly ignored her watching the news report. Nicole attempted the rib tickle but found it had no effect on Gibbs. He looked down at her and smiled. "Not ticklish, Kido."

Nicole sat back with her arms crossed over her chest as she glared at the news report. Gibbs laughed at her but held the remote out of her reach on the other side of him. She waited until Gibbs was watching the news cast again before she made her move. Once she was sure his attention was on the TV she lunged over him and made a grab for the remote. Gibbs was too quick and held the remote up high. Her attempt failed.

"Come on, Gibbs!" she whined. "CNN is so boring." Gibbs simply grinned at her, shaking his head. His eyes dared her to take the remote away. It was then that she realized he didn't care what they watched. An evil grin spread slowly across her face as she put together her next move. Gibbs watched her suspiciously.

"Planning something, aren't ya," Gibbs said as he tightened his grip on the remote. Nicole simply shrugged as her hand moved towards the glass of water she had from the night before. Her hand clenched around it and she made a swift move bringing the cup over quickly. Gibbs wasn't expecting it and the luke warm water splashed over the front of his shirt. He flinched and it was just enough for Nicole to crawl over and steal the remote back and return the station to the Cartoon Network.

Gibbs sat on the couch in disbelief staring at his now wet t-shirt. He looked at the kid next to him with astonishment. He saw that she was starting to feel that maybe she crossed a line and was in trouble but then he grinned at her and shook his head.

"Never saw that coming. Cartoons it is," Gibbs said putting his hand on her shoulder. She grinned back and turned to watch the TV. Gibbs watched a couple short cartoons with her but soon grew a little weary of the strange comedic antics of modern day cartoons. What ever happened to Bugs Bunny he wondered?

He got up and stared at his boat, admiring the smoothness. He ran his hand along it and let his thoughts drift. They shifted through time and space as faces appeared to him. He didn't have to be asleep to dream of the dead. He couldn't let them go, he held onto them tightly, embedding them in his subconscious. He didn't notice when the sound on the TV went down, he didn't notice when Nicole came up beside him, and he jumped when she touched his hand gently. He looked down at her.

"Who do you dream about?" she asked softly. Gibbs cocked his head and stared at her for a while. It was such a bold question and he didn't know how to tell her who he dreamed of.

"I dream of the dead," he finally said quietly. She looked down a moment before continuing.

"Why?"

"I don't know," Gibbs whispered. He reached out and touched his boat, as if the tangible object would give him the answer to her question.

"I dreamed of my mom last night," Nicole said, turning and crawling under his boat. She laid flat on the plywood and stared up at the ribbing going over her head. Gibbs stood on the side of the boat looking in on her between two ribs, his arms up over his head resting along the top of the boat.

"Want to talk about it?"

"She was in the dark. I couldn't see her. The man was there but he didn't have a face," she said in an even tone. Gibbs stood and watched, not wanting to interrupt for fear she would stop sharing. "She was there though, I could barely see her. Then the man he turned on the light. It was then I saw the red. It made my mom ugly. It covered her. The man, he was standing between us, faceless in the darkness while my mom was in the light. I couldn't move I couldn't help her.

"I…tried to help her but I couldn't I was too scared. Then he…he stuck something into her. There was more red. It was everywhere. Then he turned. He was coming for me, he was going to hurt me next," she said, her voice shaking at the memory of the night. Gibbs looked down on her.

"I won't let him hurt you," Gibbs said. "I promise." Nicole rolled to her side; Gibbs could see the tears she had shed while telling him about her dream. They stared at each other until Nicole finally nodded and rolled onto her back.

"Is that what you mean when you say you dream of the dead?" Nicole asked. Gibbs closed his eyes and pursed his lips. He felt the hot burn in his eyes, the tightening lump in his throat. He knew the dead haunted him.

"No," he said quietly his eyes still closed. Nicole turned her head and watched him, waiting for him to open his eyes before she asked her next question. Finally he did, and she was captured by the pain he held there, exposed.

"They haunt you don't they," she said. Gibbs licked his lips and dropped his arms from the top of the boat. They fell to his side as he closed his eyes once more. When he opened them they were once again guarded. Nicole looked down.

"Yes," he said with a small nod. "They haunt me."

"We need to let them go," she said closing her eyes and putting her hands behind her head. Gibbs thought about her statement. _We need to let them go_ she said. Together maybe they could he thought. He didn't answer her though, he remained quiet. Nicole didn't say anything further and they let it drop at that. Gibbs then turned and headed towards the stairs. "Hey, where are you going?"

"Someone got my shirt wet, I need a new one," he said throwing a grin over his shoulder at her. She smiled and flopped back on the plywood.

TBC…


	9. Piecing Together the Puzzle

**Chapter Nine: Piecing Together the Puzzle**

Tony and Ziva walked into the JAG bullpen shortly after eight in the morning California time. They met with Commander Betz and agreed to meet with the Admiral together first, then split into two rooms and interview the rest of the staff. Ensign Glousten led them to the Admiral's door and let them in.

Tony shook hands with the man first then Ziva followed suit. They then both took a seat in front of his desk. The Admiral leaned against his high backed chair and folded his hands in his lap.

"I'm Admiral Dillon P. Morse. I head up the JAG office in this sector. How can I help NCIS today?"

"You were informed of Lt. Commander Conrad?" Tony asked leaning forward in the chair. They watched as the sadness clouded the Admiral's expression as he nodded once.

"We are trying to find out if someone she knew here would have motive to kill her," Ziva continued. The Admiral looked at her.

"Johanna was a smart lady. She was friendly, didn't have any enemies in the office. She lived her life around her daughter. It was mainly the fact that Nicole was the only piece of Eddie she had left," Admiral Morse replied.

"Eddie?" Tony asked.

"Yes her husband. He was a marine. Died in Somalia in 1993, eight months before Nicole was born."

"You knew Commander Conrad well?" Ziva asked sitting up a little straighter in the chair. "So far we've gotten the idea she didn't share her private life."

"Not with many people. But I've known Johanna for a long time," he continued. His face fell more when he realized that he should have said had. He looked back up at Tony.

"How much did she share with you?" Tony asked.

"We talked regularly," Morse replied.

"About what?" Ziva prompted. Admiral Morse looked at her a moment, deciding what he should share. "She's gone, Admiral, I don't think life secrets matter any longer."

"It's not that," he said softly. "I'm just trying to see what I missed. We talked almost nightly right here in this office. About everything, how she was handling her cases, her life at home, how Nicole was getting older."

"Her dating life?" Tony asked.

"She didn't see many men if that's what you're asking. She would go on the occasional date, but I think she ultimately always compared them to Eddie. After all these years he is on such a high pedestal, that no one comes close."

"Do you know who she was seeing a couple months ago?" Ziva asked. She saw the flash in his eyes as he looked down. There was something there. Ziva thought she was going to have to push for it but then the Admiral continued.

"She was seeing a Captain. I can't remember his name, he is a marine stationed here. What was his name, oh I think it was Jacob. But I don't remember. I just know that she told him it wasn't working."

"Did she tell you why?" Ziva asked.

"He didn't stack up I guess," Admiral Morse said with a shrug.

"Seems like she was still pretty hung up on her dead husband," Tony said sitting deeper into the chair. The Admiral glanced at him with a long look before sitting back and put his arms along the rests of the chair.

"They were each other's life. They were truly in love. He was sent to a far away land and didn't return. It almost killed her career. She almost dumped the Navy. But I convinced her to stay, told her it would help in the healing."

"You knew her back then?" Ziva asked a little surprised.

"Yes. I was a Lt. Commander then. She was a lieutenant," he said with a nod.

"How did you first meet?" Tony asked.

"We were posted together when she was a junior officer. She was fresh from law school and got put second chair to me. We sparked a friendship and it went from there. I then met Eddie and became friends with him as well."

"Any idea who would want to hurt her?" Tony asked cocking his head to the side.

"No, I'm still trying to figure out how I missed it. When she asked for a transfer she went through Marie. That shocked me. But I knew that it was simply she didn't want to have to explain her reasoning to me. She knew Marie would follow through for her and gain her the transfer. I would refuse until she spilled the entire story. I guess I should have fought harder," he said looking down at his hands as he finished. Ziva thought she saw tears coming to his eyes. When he looked up again they were gone.

"That's all we have for you right now, Admiral, thank you for your time," Tony said standing. Ziva followed suit and the Admiral rose to his feet as well.

"I just hope you catch who did this. What happens to Nicole now?"

"You're the second person to ask that," Ziva said.

"She is a special girl. Many of us spent a lot of time with her. But for me it goes back to when she was born," Admiral Morse stated. Ziva simply nodded.

"She's in the custody of NCIS for now. When the case is closed she'll go to child services in the DC area," Tony said, repeating with McGee had said yesterday.

"I hope she is in good hands," he said as he opened the door for them.

"Couldn't be in better ones," Tony said with a smile and stepped through as Ziva followed. The met up with Commander Betz and were led to two interview rooms. Tony took one while Ziva set up in the other. Betz sent the first two into the rooms.

Tony interviewed Lt. Patricia Boone while Ziva questioned Lt. Andrew Gorle. Neither one had much to add to what had already been discussed. The interviews were over in short time and Lt. Paul Tanner was sent to Tony's room while Ziva got Lt. j. g. Joseph Crawford.

Ziva was bored with Lt. j. g. Crawford. He hardly knew Commander Conrad except in the professional sense that they both worked in the same office. He usually didn't work with her though, generally being assigned second chair to Lt. Commander Blake.

Tony was sitting across from Lt. Paul Tanner. The man wore a sorrowful look on his features as he fidgeted with the buttons on his uniform. Tony sat back in the chair and eyeballed the man waiting for him to look up. When he finally did, Tony narrowed his eyes at the man.

"Are we going to start soon?" Tanner asked. Tony tipped his head back and waited a moment.

"Sure," he said flatly. He then sat forward in his chair and leaned on his elbows against the table.

"You want to know about Commander Conrad right?"

"You guessed right," Tony said. "How well did you know her?"

"As well as the rest of them I guess. She was quiet, pretty, kept company with Commander Blake a lot."

"How so?" Tony asked.

"They just hung around together a lot. Breaks, lunch, after work, that sort of thing. Nothing like dating, just really good friends."

"And how about your relationship with her?"

"Relationship? We just worked together. She wasn't the type of person I generally hung around with. I'm a more outgoing up beat kinda guy."

"Did she have any issues with anyone? Maybe on a case, or someone here at the office? Maybe someone on base?"

"Not that I know of. I don't even think she knew many people outside the office here. Except her neighbors. But I could be wrong. Though I did overhear a conversation she had about a month ago," he said thoughtfully as the memory came to him.

"What kind of conversation?" Tony asked.

"The kind that when you overhear you duck your head and move along quickly," he said as he raised his eyebrows and smiled. "She was not happy with the person on the other end of the phone."

"Could she have been yelling at her daughter?" Tony continued.

"Oh no. This was not the kind of conversation you have with a child. No she was defiantly mad at an adult and she was letting them know it on the phone."

"Did she know you overheard?"

"No, I bee lined for the door soon as I heard her hissing."

"Hissing?" Tony asked sitting back in the chair and crossing his arms over his chest.

"You know when they're yelling at you in a whisper. Sounds like hissing."

"Right. And she didn't say a name or anything while she was on the phone?"

"I don't recall. I'm thinking no, I took off so," he said with a shrug. Tony nodded.

"Alright, thank you for your time, Lt. Tanner."

The man stood and left the room. Ziva came in through the door shortly after he had left. She slumped down into a chair and propped her feet up on the table. She took a deep breath and stared at Tony.

"Tough interviews?" Tony asked with a smile. Ziva closed her eyes and put up a fake smile then shook her head and crossed her arms over her chest.

"This people are supposed to be smart, they have degrees in law," Ziva said. Tony laughed. He looked up when a head popped into the doorway.

"Can I help you?" Tony asked.

"Commander Betz said you'd like to speak with me," the young man said stepping into the room.

"Thought we were done," Ziva said with a groan. The young man looked down sheepishly like he had done something wrong.

"Sorry," he said. Tony looked at Ziva and smiled. He then motioned for the man to sit.

"Have a seat, I'm Special Agent DiNozzo and that is Officer David."

"Ensign Juan Torres," the young man said as he sat down across from them.

The interview yielded nothing more than the others and soon Ensign Juan Torres was out of the room. Commander Betz came in shortly after Torres was gone and sat down across from Tony and Ziva. She crossed her arms on the table.

"That's everyone except Lt. Commander Michael Kurtz. He is Johanna's replacement though and didn't start until after she was gone."

"We don't need to interview him then," Ziva said with a wave of her hand. Betz nodded. She then stood and exited the room leaving Tony and Ziva alone.

"I think after today's interviews that we need to find the mystery man she was seeing," Tony said leaning back into the chair. Ziva looked at him.

"Seems to be a common thread. Maybe she dumped him and he got possessive?"

"I don't know. But Admiral Morse gave us the best lead on that. A marine possibly named Jacob," Tony said with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Worth looking into," Ziva said. "We should see what McGee found out today."

"Sounds good to me, then we need to call Gibbs," Tony said with a deep breath.

"No you need to call Gibbs," Ziva said with a smile.

TBC…


	10. McGee's Mission

**Chapter Ten: McGee's Mission**

After Tony and Ziva left for the JAG interviews McGee went to work getting the phone records of Lt. Commander Conrad from when she lived on base. He also searched out who her neighbors were. After putting the petition in for her phone records he decided to try his luck at the neighbor's house. He figured the house where both adults were officers in the Navy was a bad place to begin since most likely no one was home. He checked the clock, kids would be off at school, and anyone with a post would be there by now.

He looked up LaTonya Harper, she didn't seem to have a job. He just hoped she didn't pick this day to go to the market or run other errands. He walked the short distance from the base housing they were using to where Commander Conrad had resided when she lived on this base. He looked at the house next door and walked up the cement pathway to the front door. McGee rang the buzzer and waited.

It wasn't very long before a small black woman answered the door and smiled at him. McGee returned the smile and pulled his badge from his pocket. He flipped it open before he started speaking. "My name is Special Agent Tim McGee from NCIS. I'd like to ask you a few questions."

"What is this about?" the woman asked, the smile falling from her face.

"Ma'am I hate to be the one to tell you this but Lt. Commander Conrad was murdered yesterday," McGee said softly. The woman gasped and her hand went to her mouth. The tears slid down her cheeks as she stared at McGee in disbelief. She shook her head as if it would make this dream go away.

"Come in," she said shaking herself from the shock. "Sorry I…have a seat."

"Thank you, Ma'am."

"Please call me LaTonya. What can I help you with?"

"We're just trying to get a feel for Commander Conrad's life. We thought maybe you would know if she was having problems with anyone, someone she was seeing. Were you close to Commander Conrad?"

"We were neighbors. We have children the same ages. Nicole is the same age as my Shanise…oh my...Nicole…"

"Nicole is ok. She is staying with an Agent from NCIS right now."

"Dear lord."

"So Nicole came over a lot?"

"Oh yes, and my children went over there. Nicole was friends with my boys too. They are older but not too much. Jarius is fifteen now and LaTrell is going to be thirteen in a few days."

"Was there anyone that you knew of that Commander Conrad may have been fleeing from?"

"Fleeing from?"

"Her request for transfer caught everyone by surprise. It seems she may have been running from someone on base."

"There was someone. She would send Nicole over some nights. Asking if she could hang out over here. Like she just didn't want Nicole around the house in case."

"In case of what?" McGee asked.

"There was someone driving by. She had called the MPs but they never caught the guy. By the time they were out here the person was long gone. I think it was scaring her."

"Did she know how was doing this?"

"I think she knew. I don't and she never did tell the police but I think she knew. Just the way she would talk about it. Like she knew how dangerous the person was."

"How often did this occur?"

"It didn't start until about three months ago. Then it seemed like it was a couple times a week. I was getting nervous about it and so were the McFarlans. They live on the other side of the Conrad's house."

"And no one ever saw who was driving this car?"

"No it was always at night, and the car had tinted windows."

"Do you remember what kind of car it was?"

"No, but I'm horrible with stuff like that. My husband might remember. He'll be home later this evening. I just remember it being a dark color, like a midnight blue or black with dark windows."

"How did Commander Conrad react when the car was around?"

"She would be nervous. Sometimes she would come over here with Nicole and hang out with Julian and myself. She would watch and make sure whoever it was didn't leave the car. I think she was afraid we'd know the person."

"And the MPs didn't do anything?"

"She wouldn't or couldn't tell them who it was. All they had was the description of the vehicle but they never caught him. And technically all he was doing was driving down the road. He didn't really break any laws."

"What about the rest of the neighborhood? What did they think about this?"

"Not many noticed I think. The only reason we did was because Johanna would bring Nicole over when it happened. I don't think Nicole even knew why they were coming over she just got to spend time with my Shanise."

"Was there any other people in her life?"

"You mean men?" LaTonya asked leaning forward in the recliner she was sitting in. McGee nodded. "There was a marine coming around a lot. She kept Nicole from him and it didn't work out. Far as I could tell it was Johanna's end that didn't work. The marine was into her, she just…well she was still hung up on her husband I think."

"Do you know the marine's name?"

"Sorry no. But my husband might. He works on the base so he would know more people. Besides I generally only know the spouses of the officers," she added with a weak smile. McGee nodded he stared at the notes he had taken on his PDA and thought if there was anything else to ask.

"Is there anything else you can think of that might help?" McGee asked sitting back onto the couch. Mrs. Harper thought for a while then pursed her lips and shook her head.

"It's a shame this happened. Johanna was a wonderful woman."

"Thank you for your time, Ma'am," McGee said standing up. "Do you know if the McFarlans are home?"

"No, both of them are in the Navy and are on duty right now. Amanda gets off in the early afternoon around the time the children get home from school though."

"Thank you again," McGee said with a smile as LaTonya showed him out. McGee decided to make his way back to the housing they were using to sort through his notes. When he got there he noticed he had email on his laptop. He checked it and was a little surprised to find Commander Conrad's phone records already there. He opened them up and printed them out so he could look them over later. He then loaded his notes from the PDA to the laptop. After that was accomplished he printed those out as well.

He began sifting through the notes he had taken in the interview with LaTonya Harper and made a separate sheet of key highlights that he had learned. After he was finished he looked through the phone records and started looking up the numbers that she had called in the three months prior to her transfer.

He was just about finished with the phone numbers when Tony and Ziva arrived back from their interviews. They both came in quietly and sat down at the table with him. They looked at him expectantly.

"Hi, guys," he said.

"Probie, what'd you find?" Tony said stretching his legs under the table. Ziva leaned forward and laid her head on her arms.

"Tough interviews?" McGee asked with a raised eyebrow.

"On with it, Probie," Tony said warningly.

"Right. I talked to one neighbor, a LaTonya Harper, wife of Captain Julian Harper. She said there was someone driving by the Conrad house in the three months prior to Johanna transferring. Said it was a midnight blue or black car with tinted windows. It was all she remembered but said her husband would probably know more."

"Someone was stalking Commander Conrad?" Tony asked.

"Looks that way," McGee replied. "Mrs. Harper said she believed that Commander Conrad knew who it was in the car but wouldn't tell anyone. They had spoken to the MPs on numerous occasions but I guess since technically he was just driving down the street and they didn't have a name and never actually caught him doing it, they couldn't do anything about it."

"And now she is dead," Ziva said shaking her head. McGee nodded slowly.

"Anything more, Probie?"

"She said Commander Conrad was seeing someone but she didn't have a name. I have the phone numbers of everyone she called, and a breakdown of what the numbers are. There are still five numbers that I can't trace just by looking them up."

"Good work, Probie," Tony said with a smile. Tony continued on with the help of Ziva in filling McGee in on everything they had learned in the interviews today. They all agreed that the mystery man was looking like their best suspect at the moment, all they had to do now was figure out who it was. They spent an hour and a half bringing each other up to speed before rapping it up.

"Guess it's time for you to call Gibbs now," Ziva said with a smile as she stood from the table. Tony gave her a glare and McGee smiled. Tony looked at his watch and nodded, agreeing with her. If he didn't call Gibbs soon he would get another angry phone call from the bossman. He picked up his cell phone and dialed.

TBC…


	11. A DVD Player

**Chapter Eleven: A DVD Player**

Gibbs tossed the wet shirt into the corner of his room and pulled out a fresh white NCIS t-shirt from the drawer. He tugged it over his shoulders, shrugging it down to his waist and walked from his room. He found Nicole still laying flat under his boat. He sat down softly on the couch, so not to scare up so much dust. Nicole continued to stare at the ceiling. They were quiet for a while before Nicole turned up on her arm and looked at Gibbs.

"We should go buy a DVD player," she said with a smile. Gibbs shook his head.

"What would I want with a DVD player?" Gibbs asked crossing his arms over the NCIS.

"Um, we could watch movies," she said like he was an idiot. The corners of Gibbs' mouth turned up in a smile. Nicole shook her head before flopping back dramatically on her back. "What am I supposed to do then?"

Gibbs didn't answer her and she rolled her eyes. Big help he was. She wanted something to do, to keep her mind off what happened yesterday. She couldn't get the image of her mother in pain out of her head. She felt the tears coming back and fought hard to control them. Gibbs noticed the change and rose from the couch. He slowly walked up to his boat and leaned against it. He reached through the ribbing and stroked her shoulder.

"You alright, Kido?" he asked softly. She shook her head and the first of the tears escaped down her cheeks. Gibbs knew he needed something to distract her, he just didn't know what. She rolled away from him and started to run her fingers along the other side of the ribs on the boat. Gibbs circled around to the end and climbed up inside beside her.

He circled her with his arms and she leaned back into his chest. She let the tears flow down her cheeks, but she didn't make any sound. He closed his eyes, not knowing how to comfort her.

"It's going to be ok," he whispered not knowing what else to say. She continued to cry. Gibbs heard his cell phone ringing and picked his head up, looking back over his shoulder. He spotted it on the couch and decided it would be a bad time to move. He let it ring. After it had stopped there was a brief pause before it started ringing again. Gibbs simply tightened his grip on Nicole and stayed under the boat.

"You should get your phone," she whispered in a croaky voice.

"It can wait," Gibbs said.

"What if it's important, what if it's about my mom?" she asked picking at the rib in front of her. Gibbs loosened his grip on her and slid his body to the end of the plywood and then stood up. He grabbed his phone and quickly opened it up.

"Gibbs," he said rubbing his face looking back at the child under his boat. She looked terribly small and frail.

"Hey, Bossman, we got an update for you," Tony said. "What took you so long to get to the phone?"

"Doesn't matter, what do you have?" he said with a sigh. Tony noticed how much his boss sounded drained. He started to worry a bit about the older man.

"You alright, Gibbs?" Tony asked before he could stop himself.

"Case, Tony, update," Gibbs said impatiently.

"Right. We spoke to everyone in the JAG office here except Commander Conrad's replacement. He didn't even show up until after she was gone. Anyway, Admiral Morse, he runs the place, he knew Conrad the best. Their relationship goes back to before the child was born. He said she was seeing someone on base but didn't know who, Conrad was pretty elusive," Tony began.

"What else?" Gibbs asked.

Tony went on to tell him what the rest of the interviews yielded and how McGee had found the phone records and had spoken with one of the Commander's neighbors. He explained they would speak with the rest of the neighbors once it was later in the day. He also told Gibbs of the car that was driving by the house.

"That's what we got so far," Tony said when he had completed the update.

"Good work, DiNozzo. Keep at it and find this guy. He sounds like the best lead."

"That's what we thought too. Maybe the kid knows something."

"Yeah, I'll check into it," Gibbs said looking at Nicole.

"We'll call later tonight with the next update," Tony said and then Gibbs ended the call and tossed his cell phone on the couch. He crossed his arms and looked at Nicole. She rolled over and peeked at him from under the boat.

"Was about my mom, huh," she said sadly, earning a nod from Gibbs. "What did they say?"

"DiNozzo said they had to check into some more things," Gibbs said.

"He said more than that, Gibbs," she said sliding to the end of the plywood. She walked over to him and sat down on the steps looking up at him.

"Yeah he did. He said your mom's friend the Admiral told them that your mom was seeing someone on the base."

"What do you mean? She worked for Uncle Dillon."

"Uncle Dillon?" Gibbs asked.

"He's not my real uncle, he's just mom's friend. He's the Admiral."

"Ok. He said that your mom was seeing a man on base," Gibbs said.

"Like dating someone?"

"Yeah."

"I wouldn't know," she said looking down at her feet briefly. "Mom kept that part of her life from me."

"How so?"

"She didn't tell me anything. Never did. I think she didn't want me to get attached to anyone because she would leave them eventually."

"Must have been pretty tough," Gibbs said sitting down next to her.

"Things were good. I mean my mom and I…we got along," she said fresh tears coming to her eyes. "But she had this image of my dad I think and she wouldn't let anyone in. They knew each other all their lives."

"What about a car driving by the house?" Gibbs asked softly.

"Mom didn't think I knew about that. She'd send me over to Shanise's house when she would get nervous though. I pretended I didn't know what was going on, but it was a dark car."

"What kind do you remember?"

"No, just a four door, sedan kind of car I think," she said crossing her arms over her shoulders and holding herself. Gibbs draped his arm around her and pulled her to him.

"No idea of who was driving?"

"No. But I think my mom did," she said dropping her head. Gibbs could tell she didn't want to talk about it anymore. It was then he felt his stomach start to growl. Nicole heard it and looked up at him with a smile. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Guess I'm hungry. What about you?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said softly. Gibbs stood and headed up the stairs as Nicole followed him. He looked in the kitchen for something edible and cringed. There wasn't anything there. He leaned against the counter as Nicole stood against the door frame.

"Out of food," he said placing his hands palms down on the countertop. She shook her head.

"You don't have anything here do you?" she asked with a small laugh.

"I wasn't expecting anyone," he said looking sheepish. "How about we go out and get something?"

"Where?"

"You're choice."

"I just moved here, Gibbs, I don't know where to eat."

"Ok what are you in the mood for?"

"How about we just go fast food?"

"Burgers it is," Gibbs said pushing off from the counter and grabbing his coat. Nicole shrugged hers on and headed out to the car; Gibbs followed and drove them to the nearest burger joint. After eating, Gibbs was driving back to the house when they passed a store.

"Let's get a DVD player," Nicole said with a grin. Gibbs looked at her.

"Why?"

"Come on, Gibbs, broaden your horizons. Besides I need something to keep my mind occupied," she said the last part hinged on sadness. Gibbs looked at her and saw the pain in her eyes. He pulled into the parking lot much to the delight of Nicole.

"Guess we'll need to buy movies too," he said softly as he pulled into a parking spot. Nicole smiled wide and got out of the car.

After Nicole had picked out a suitable DVD player, along with several movies, microwave popcorn, and a case of grape soda Gibbs cringed when they got to the checkout. He forked over the cash shaking his head while the cashier commented to Nicole how lucky she was to have a dad like him. Nicole gave the woman a polite smile, but Gibbs saw the pain behind it. He didn't say anything just grabbed the bags and herded Nicole towards the doors.

In the car Nicole was quiet, and Gibbs wondered if it had anything to do with the comment the cashier had made. He thought about what this girl was going through; to lose both parents by the age of eleven was not an easy thing to do.

"I hope you know how to hook this thing up," Gibbs said as they pulled into the driveway. Nicole looked at him incredulously. She cocked an eyebrow. "What?"

"You don't?"

"No. I hate stuff like this," Gibbs said shaking his head. He got out of the car and grabbed the bags heading to the front door. Nicole scampered after him and once in the basement she pulled the DVD player from the box and expertly hooked it to the television. Gibbs was amazed. She then went to work getting the first DVD from the package, which took her about twenty minutes. After it was freed she put it into the machine and sat back on the couch with remote in hand. Gibbs took the cushion next to her.

"Looks like it works," she said as the menu for the movie came up.

"What is this anyway," Gibbs asked as he read the menu options. "What movie did you put in?"

"The Pacifier," she said softly as she pushed the enter key on the remote. The movie started. Gibbs looked over at her and raised an eyebrow at her. "What? It's good. Just watch it."

"Mindless entertainment I guess," Gibbs said with a sigh and settled into the couch for the movie. It wasn't long before Nicole was leaning against him, popcorn bowl in his lap, sodas on the table in front of them. She was quiet through the entire movie and Gibbs didn't think she laughed once, maybe cracked a smile. He knew she was still thinking about her mom. When the movie ended she sat up and hit the stop button before hitting the open button. The tray popped out and she put the DVD back into its case.

She looked over her other selections and made a choice. Gibbs watched as again she went through the lengthy process to remove the DVD from its packaging. He shook his head.

"What?" she asked looking up at him.

"Such an effort just to get the stupid thing from the box," Gibbs said. "What's this one called?"

"Uh, A Knight's Tale. It's a bit more girly than The Pacifier but it's funny."

"You want more popcorn?" he asked standing up with the empty bowl.

"No, but another grape pop wouldn't hurt," she said with a smile as she inserted the new DVD into the player. Gibbs smiled and took the bowl upstairs to the sink, grabbing a can of soda for her and a cup of coffee for himself. By the time he was back on the couch again she had the second movie going. This time she did laugh at the funny parts, but it wasn't a hearty laugh. She had made herself more comfortable, using his legs as a pillow, while stretching her legs down the rest of the couch. Gibbs sat back and watched, her more than the movie, wandering what he could do to help her deal with her internal pain.

It was early evening when Nicole popped the second movie out of the DVD player. Gibbs was starting to get hungry again and wondered if Nicole was too. She started to unwrap a third movie and Gibbs shook his head.

"What?" she asked again as she gnawed at the plastic with her teeth.

"Ever get tired of just sitting?" he asked picking up a sander and going to his boat. She watched him as she peeled the plastic away.

"No," she said with a smile as she tore at the stickers holding the case shut. He went to sanding on the boat. "Don't you ever get tired of working on your boat?"

Gibbs didn't answer but he did chuckle softly. He got her point but he somehow also thought it was different. He was creating something, she was wasting her time. He let it drop. He looked over at her as she put the DVD in and dropped the sander.

"How bout pizza for dinner?" he asked.

"Fast food for lunch, delivery pizza for supper, you're a top notch guy, Gibbs," she said with a giggle. "Works for me, I like meat lovers."

Gibbs nodded and reached for the phone. After ordering the pizza he went to work on the boat again while she settled in for movie number three. Gibbs picked up the box and read the title, Meet the Parents, and then set it down returning his attention to his boat. Thirty minutes later he heard the doorbell ring. He dropped the sander and wiped his hands before trotting up the steps pulling his wallet out as he went.

He paid the pizza man and was in the kitchen getting plates to take downstairs when he heard the doorbell ring again. He leaned back from the cupboard as if he could tell who was at the door from where he was before setting the plates down on the pizza box. He walked to his front door and pulled it open slowly. His eyebrows raised in question at the person standing on the other side.

"Thought I'd check on how you were doing," Director Shepard said with a smile.

"Doing fine. Team is working hard in California, chasing down a lead," Gibbs said stepping back. "Come on in, we were just about to eat pizza."

"Gibbs, where's the pizza!" they both heard Nicole yell from in the basement.

Jen nodded and stepped past him into the living room. Gibbs went back and picked up one more plate and the case of pop and led the way down the basement steps. Nicole turned when he came down and smiled politely when she saw Director Shepard right behind him.

TBC…


	12. Phone Numbers

**Chapter Twelve: Phone Numbers**

Tony hung up the phone after his conversation with Gibbs and tossed it onto the table. Ziva sat down at the table and looked over at McGee, who was looking over a stack of papers. She leaned forward so she could see what it was.

"Phone records?" Ziva asked. McGee looked up at her a second, nodded, then went back to what he was doing. Tony sat down next to him.

"Anything useful, Probie?" Tony asked.

"So far it's mostly what you'd expect. She made calls to the office from here, her neighbors appear a lot. There are calls to local food places. Lt. Commander Blake's number comes up a lot. Calls to a car repair shop, umm, looks like to the school."

"Ok, but is there anything useful?" Ziva asked raising an eyebrow.

"There are five numbers I've yet to identify. Two have base prefixes but don't seem to be listed. One seems to be a cell phone, and the others I'm guessing are off base," McGee continued to explain.

"Can you find out who they belong to?" Tony asked leaning on his elbows. McGee looked up at him.

"Yeah, Tony, I just have to dig some more. There not listed in the phone book is all," McGee said.

"Did you try calling them?" Tony asked as if he was talking to a child. McGee glared at him and shook his head. He pulled the laptop closer to him and ignored Tony while he plugged away at the keys attempting to track down the remaining five numbers.

"Well geez, Probie, don't you think that would be an easy way to figure it out?" Tony asked.

"Not if we don't want to tip off whoever we're after. Especially since we don't know who we are after," McGee said still staring at the computer screen, making Ziva smile.

"He has a point, Tony," Ziva said.

Tony shrugged his shoulders and pulled the top page off the stack. He skimmed it over and then tossed it back. He got up and moved into the kitchen to get something to drink. McGee continued to pound away on his keyboard as he dug deeper into the phone company's database. He found the two base numbers.

"I found the two unlisted base numbers. One is for a two star Admiral, looks like his private office line. The other belongs to Captain Jacob Lariman, office line as well," McGee said squinting at his screen.

"Didn't Admiral Morse say something about a guy named Jacob?" Ziva asked looking up at Tony. Tony was trying to recall the conversation they had had with Admiral Morse and slowly began to nod his head.

"Yeah, he said he was a marine, that he thought Commander Conrad was possibly seeing a guy named Jacob," Tony said his voice growing with excitement.

"Might be worth checking out," McGee said with a shrug. He continued to search for the other three numbers. He found one of the off base numbers about half an hour later. Ziva was still sitting at the table reading over the interview notes, as well as the notes McGee had compiled during the day. Tony was in the living room lying on the couch sleeping.

"Anything yet?" Ziva asked as she laid the papers down in front of her.

"Maybe," McGee said softly as he pulled up another page. "Looks like I may have found one of the off base numbers. That's odd."

"What?"

"It seems to be a payphone," McGee said his face showing the confusion. Ziva stood up and walked up behind him, leaning over his shoulder to stare at the screen. She leaned back then and looked at the notes on the table.

"Why would she be calling a payphone?" Ziva asked. "Tony!"

A few seconds later Tony walked through the doorway still looking half asleep. He blinked a few times and ran his hand through his hair. After yawning he slumped into a chair and stared up at Ziva.

"What?" he asked some what annoyed.

"McGee found another one of the phone numbers," Ziva said.

"Way to go, Probie. So?" Tony asked leaning forward.

"It's for a payphone. I think it's about three blocks from the base," McGee said.

"A payphone?" Tony asked scratching his chin. Ziva nodded as McGee shrugged.

"That's what this says," McGee said.

"Doesn't make much sense. All right we need to find out why she called that payphone then," Tony said looking at the table.

"Might be difficult, Tony, I mean it could have been any number of reasons that she called," Ziva said.

"First let's talk with this Captain Jacob Lariman," Tony said. "See what he has to say about Commander Conrad."

"Sounds like a plan. Maybe you should call Gibbs and let him know what's going on," Ziva said.

"I think we should interview the neighbors first," Tony said looking at Ziva. She shrugged. Tony glanced at the clock and decided to start trying to see if the neighbors had arrived home yet. After the interviews they would call Gibbs and fill him in. McGee was plugging in the last two numbers now, the other off base number and the cell phone.

Tony stood and stretched, then he walked around the table. Ziva stood to meet him. McGee stayed in front of the computer typing away. He was determined to find the last two numbers.

"McGee, stay and finish up. Ziva, let's go see if the neighbors are home," Tony said and walked for the door. McGee heard the front door shut and he continued to work. He worked for another hour but still came up empty on the two numbers. He was running out of ideas on how to find them without a search warrant.

He finally gave up and decided to fix himself something to eat. He made a sandwich and sat at the table quietly eating it. He pushed the case away from him to help clear his mind, maybe if he came at it with a new angle he'd be able to see whatever it was he was missing. It was a while before he heard the front door open and he noticed it had been close to two hours. He sat down in front of the computer again and began his searching.

Tony slumped down in the chair next to him as Ziva marched past both and out of sight. McGee looked up from the screen and gave Tony a quizzical look. Tony seemed drained and shook his head.

"You get anything, Probie?" Tony asked half heartedly.

"Ah, no, nothing more," McGee said. "What about you?"

"Bogus. Her neighbors didn't know anything. Except Captain Harper remember the car was a black sedan. He didn't know the make or model or license plate number, and he doesn't remember seeing it anywhere else."

"So we got nothing basically," McGee said.

"We have Captain Jacob Lariman. Which none of the neighbors knew," Tony said frustrated.

"I guess next step is talking to Captain Lariman," McGee said.

"No next step is calling Gibbs before he calls us," Tony said grabbing his cell phone.

TBC…


	13. A Faceless Man

**Chapter Thirteen: A Faceless Man**

Gibbs sat down on the couch in the middle section with Nicole to his left. He placed the pizza box on the coffee table and spread the plates out along the edge. Jen sat down a little too heavily on the couch and a cloud of dust escaped, engulfing the area. Gibbs decided to wait a moment before opening the pizza box.

"You kinda gotta be a little careful when you sit down," Nicole said as she leaned forward to see Jen around Gibbs. "He doesn't clean down here all that much."

Gibbs flashed a glare at Nicole who smiled at him in return, sitting back into the couch. He shook his head and then opened the pizza box and pulled a slice out, plopping it down on Nicole's plate. He then pulled a piece out for himself, before grabbing a third slice and setting it on the plate he brought down for Jen.

"She's right, Jethro," Jen said with a smile before picking up the piece of pizza. Nicole giggled before shoving more pizza in her mouth, then her attention was directed to the television which was still playing Meet the Parents. Gibbs ignored the comment and took another bite of pizza.

Jen looked at him and studied his face for a moment. Gibbs cocked his head to the side and waited. He could tell she was thinking about something. She then pointed to his eye.

"What did you do to your eye, you didn't have that yesterday," she said. Gibbs turned his attention back to the television.

"Kid did it to me," Gibbs said using his head to point to Nicole. Her head snapped towards him with her mouth hanging open. Gibbs tried to hold his face blank, but the corners of his mouth twisted up at her reaction.

"I did not!" Nicole bellowed in defense.

"Did too," Gibbs said calmly looking at her.

"Did not! You did it on your own! It's not my fault you sleep under that thing," Nicole said pointing a finger at the boat. Jen was smiling now at their banter.

"It's still your fault. You woke me up," Gibbs said matter-of-factly.

"Like I did that on purpose, besides you're the one that sat up really fast and smacked your head on the board," Nicole said looking back at the television.

"Jethro?" Jen asked. He simply turned his head to look at her. "You hit your head on the boat while sleeping under it?"

Gibbs considered what she said for a moment and then looked over at Nicole, contemplating how he should answer her question. Nicole looked up at him and glared.

"Don't even think about it. I have pop this time," Nicole said pointing to the can of grape soda on the table. Gibbs could not help it anymore and he laughed aloud.

"Yeah, Jen, I smacked my head off the rib on the boat last night," he replied nodding. Nothing more was said. The three of them turned their attention back to the movie. Before long his cell phone began to ring and he got up from the couch pulling it from his pocket. He checked the screen and saw DiNozzo's number.

"I'm going to take this upstairs," he said looking at Jen. She nodded as Gibbs looked over at Nicole. She did not seem to notice as she was wrapped up in the movie. Gibbs flipped the phone open and as he took the steps two at a time.

"Gibbs."

"Boss, update time," Tony said still sitting at the table in the house they were using.

"What do you got?"

"Not much."

"Not good, DiNozzo," Gibbs growled.

"We got a name, possibly the guy Commander Conrad was seeing."

"Who?" Gibbs barked.

"His name is Captain Jacob Lariman. Admiral Morse said he thought she was seeing a guy named Jacob, and his line comes up on her home phone records. None of the neighbors knew the name though."

"It's a start."

"That's what we thought. McGee went through Commander Conrad's phone records number by number and ID'ed them all."

"Anything of interest?"

"Yeah, Probie traced one number to an off base payphone. We're not sure why she would be calling a payphone."

"See what you can find."

"Will do, Boss. Oh, there were also two numbers that McGee could not track down. He thinks one is an off base number and the other he thinks might be a cell number."

"Have him send it to Abby in the morning, see if she can't find there origins."

"I'll tell him. Otherwise, it seemed like everyday stuff. Delivery numbers, car repair, calls on base that seem to have to do with her job. We'll run them down anyway while we're here, find out for sure."

"Ok. Anything more from the neighbors?"

"Just got that it was a black sedan from Captain Harper, he didn't know make, model, or license number. He didn't remember seeing it around anywhere else either. But we'll run it against Captain Lariman and see what we come up with."

"Anything else?"

"No, Boss, this case is weird. You'd think there was something that stuck out, as personal as the attack was."

"It's there, DiNozzo, you just have to find it," Gibbs said. He wished he could be out there interviewing people himself, but he knew that right now his place was here with Nicole.

"We're looking, Boss, be sure of that. We're being thorough on this one. How's the kid?"

"Keep at it. She's doing fine. Call me tomorrow."

"Cell or office?"

"Cell," Gibbs said as he looked back at the basement door. He flipped the phone closed before Tony could reply and pocketed it. He then returned to the basement, taking his seat between Jen and Nicole. They had done a good number on the pizza and he shoveled the rest of the piece he had started into his mouth, grabbing a second piece. They sat and watched the rest of the movie, before Gibbs looked over and saw Nicole asleep. Her legs had again made their way into his lap as she used the arm of the couch as a pillow.

Gibbs scooped her up gently and carried her to the stairs. Jen watched him and rose to follow him once he was halfway up. She paused and grabbed the remote, turning the television off, before climbing the stairs. Gibbs was already out of sight and she waited in his living room.

Gibbs laid Nicole on the bed in the guest room and covered her with the blankets. He then stood and stared at her a moment before reaching down and gently moving her bangs from her face. He felt the pain in his heart again as images of Kelly floated through his mind. He then turned and left the room, turning the overhead light off as he went.

He found Jen standing in the middle of the room waiting for him. He walked up in front of her and stopped. They stood quietly, each studying the other's face. Jen noticed that the smile that had been on his face all evening was overshadowed by sadness in his eyes.

"Are you alright?" Jen asked softly. Gibbs was a little taken aback by the question. He stood staring at the floor spinning her question over and over in his mind. On the outside he was fine, he was he old self, the bastard marine that never gives up, but on the inside he was in turmoil, and had been for quite some time. Nicole had been right the dead haunt him. The issue now was if he was ready to admit it to someone else.

"I'm fine," he said with a slight nod, his mind not ready to open. He could tell she didn't believe him but she was willing to accept his answer for now. She waited a moment before she continued.

"What did DiNozzo have to say?"

"They're still chasing down leads in California. I guess they found someone that might have motive. They think Commander Conrad was involved with a Marine captain named Lariman. Also chasing down some phone record questions. There was a stalker but all we have is a black sedan with tinted windows."

"Sounds like no one knew what was going on in this woman's life."

"They didn't," Gibbs said with a shrug. They stood in silence again, eyes locked on each other. Jen finally broke the contact by looking down for a moment.

"Jethro, you know you only have twenty-four more hours left in the deal," she said quietly. Gibbs looked back towards the guest bedroom. Jen followed his gaze. "CPS is already looking for a suitable family that can handle Nicole."

"Handle her? What's to handle?"

"Jethro, she's going to need support, she just saw her mother murdered," Jen said sternly. Gibbs closed his eyes. He didn't want to have this conversation. "I should go."

Gibbs only nodded, he didn't say anything. She stood for a moment longer before she lowered her eyes and walked around him, heading for the door. Gibbs followed her with his eyes. She stopped after she opened the door and looked back at him.

"It's good to see you laughing again," she said with a sad smile and then was out the door and gone. He stared at the closed door for a while as he contemplated what she had said to him. He then decided it was time to sleep. He was too tired to work on the boat tonight so he decided he could use a good night's rest in his own bed.

Gibbs changed into sweats and then climbed under his covers. His mind was restless, but exhaustion over took him and he slipped into a light sleep. The dead visited him again that night, standing in the shadows and calling to him to help them. He saw them reaching out to him, begging him not to fail them. He couldn't help them, reach them, or touch them. He failed, just like every night.

He didn't know how long he had been asleep before he felt a presence in the room and awoke to find Nicole standing next to him shaking his shoulder. He blinked the sleep from his eyes trying to clear his mind enough to function.

"What's wrong, Kelly?" he asked groggily. Nicole ignored the name slip.

"I had another bad dream," she whispered with tears running down her face. "Every time I close my eyes he tries to get me. He doesn't even have a face."

Gibbs sat up then and finally pulled himself from sleep. He patted the bed and Nicole climbed over him. She grabbed a pillow and was hugging it to herself when Gibbs lay back against his own pillow, wrapping an arm around her.

"Every thing is ok, you're safe here," he said soothingly. He felt her shift a little.

"But he comes in my sleep," she said with a shake to her voice.

"That's going to happen for a while," Gibbs said. "It's never easy."

"You never told me what you meant when you said you dream about the dead," she said her tears slowing. Gibbs was quiet. He didn't answer her. He didn't know how or what to say. Nicole looked up at him expectantly.

She didn't press him for an answer. She could tell it was something that he didn't like to talk about. She wondered if anyone else even knew how tormented he was by his dreams. Gibbs was almost asleep again when Nicole broke the silence.

"You called me Kelly again," she said softly. Gibbs opened his eyes and looked at her. She stared back at him with compassionate eyes as she read the pain coming from his. She cocked her head to the side. "Who was she?"

Gibbs felt his own tears forming as the memories of his daughter came back to him. She wasn't much older than Nicole when he had lost her. He was quiet for a long time and Nicole thought he wasn't going to answer him before he finally spoke.

"She was my daughter," Gibbs said softly, the first of the tears slowly sliding down his face.

"Where is she now?" Nicole asked as she watched the tear move down his cheek. She felt the sadness coming from him and wondered what had happened to cause this much pain.

"Gone…forever," Gibbs said taking a shaky breath. He looked away from Nicole then and bit his lower lip to stop the pain that had started. Nicole noticed the change and decided it wasn't a good time to push the subject.

"I'm sorry," she said softly. Gibbs finally looked back over at her and gave her a reassuring smile.

"Don't sweat it, Kido," he said tightening the arm around her. She nodded.

"How come the Director came to your house tonight," she said with a smile. Gibbs eyed her for a moment.

"What?" he asked confused.

"She likes you, Gibbs," Nicole said with a smile.

"No, she was making sure I could take care of you," Gibbs said turning his head so he could stare at the ceiling. Memories of his and Jen's past floating through his mind.

"You're not too bright when it comes to girls, are you," Nicole said with a giggle. Gibbs turned his head towards her and gave her a glare for a moment. It made her laugh a little harder and then he tickled her making her laugh ever more.

"Don't read into things you don't understand, Kido," Gibbs said when he was done tickling her.

"Who says I don't understand. You two have history," Nicole said confidently. Gibbs looked at her and shook his head.

"When did eleven year olds get so smart?"

"You like her too, Gibbs, admit it," Nicole said settling back into his arm, stifling a yawn.

"Get some sleep," he said staring at the ceiling again, his mind replaying the scene right before Jen left for the night. He wondered what she had meant by her last statement. Nicole was quiet for a while and Gibbs thought she had gone to sleep. Again he was almost out when she spoke.

"You should talk about the ones who haunt you, Gibbs. Someone once told me it's good to talk about your bad dreams," she said sleepily. Gibbs looked over at her and saw her eyes closed and her breathing evening out. She was almost asleep. He thought about what she had said to him and knew she was right. Soon he too was drifting back to sleep. This time it was dreamless.

TBC…


	14. Investigative Means

**Chapter Fourteen: Investigative Means**

After hanging up with Gibbs, Tony looked at McGee sitting at the table and shook his head. He didn't know what to make of Gibbs' attitude during this case. He then stood and went to the fridge.

"What'd Gibbs have to say?" McGee asked stretching his back in the chair.

"Just to keep doing what we're doing," Tony mumbled as he searched the shelves for something. There wasn't much there, they had never actually made it to the store. "We should order something for dinner."

"Sounds good to me. What's the plan for tomorrow?" Ziva asked coming back into the kitchen and taking a seat next to McGee. Tony shut the fridge, turned, and leaned against the door. His face was thoughtful as he mulled over her question.

"Find Captain Lariman. Maybe if we talk to him we can figure out what's going on. Also Gibbs wants us to run down all the numbers on her phone records, well except the obvious ones, food places, car repairs, that sort of thing."

"What are we going to eat?" McGee asked. The other two both shrugged not saying anything. McGee picked up the phone book and started to flip through it looking for something to order. They decided on Chinese and after they were done eating they called it a day.

In the morning they set out for Captain Lariman's office. They came inside and found a sergeant sitting at a desk. Ziva approached slowly with McGee at her side while Tony looked around for a moment.

"Can I help you?" the young man asked looking up from his work. Ziva noticed the closed door behind him.

"I'm Special Agent McGee, this is Officer David, and that is Special Agent DiNozzo. We're with NCIS and would like to speak with Captain Lariman."

"Then you'll have to call your Washington office," the sergeant said looking down at his paperwork again.

"We are the Washington office," DiNozzo said stepping up to the desk. The man looked up again. "What do you mean?"

"Sir, Captain Lariman left for Norfolk three days ago. He's there for another week working with a counter terrorism unit. He's going to be deployed to Iraq in a month."

"He's in Norfolk?" Ziva asked looking up at Tony.

"That's what I said, Ma'am."

"What's your name?" Tony asked.

"Sergeant Thomas Riker, Sir," the young man replied.

"How do we get in touch with the captain, Sergeant Riker?" McGee asked.

"He can be reached through the base; I have a direct number to his housing. Also has a cell phone that I'm supposed to use if it's an emergency," Riker said looking up.

"We need those numbers," Ziva said leaning forward on the desk. The young sergeant nodded slowly as he searched his desk for a piece of paper. Finally he found what he was looking for and held it up to Ziva, who took it passing it immediately to McGee.

"Any of those numbers match?" Tony asked McGee. The sergeant looked up in confusion.

"What's this about?" Riker asked hesitantly.

"No, Tony, neither match," McGee said after checking the numbers against Commander Conrad's phone records.

"Thank you for your time, Sergeant Riker," DiNozzo said turning for the outside door. The sergeant stood quickly and moved around his desk. Ziva and McGee stopped behind Tony.

"What's going on here?" he asked again nervously.

"We need to speak with Captain Lariman about a homicide," Tony said as he pulled the door open and walked out into the sunlight, with Ziva and McGee right behind him. Sergeant Riker stood dumbfounded in the middle of the office gaping at them.

"This guy sounds better and better," Tony said shaking his head. "He could be the mystery man in her life, he's in Norfolk two days before the murder, and has a good reason for being there. Probie, check to see what kind of car our Marine Captain drives."

"On it, Tony," McGee said as he pulled his phone from his pocket, calling Abby. He walked away from Ziva and Tony.

"We need to check the rest of the numbers," Ziva said. Tony nodded and looked around.

"The ones inside the JAG office I'm thinking we can eliminate as being job related," Tony said. Ziva nodded agreeing with him. "But the ones to other people on base I think we should at least look into. Let's start from the top and move down."

They waited for McGee to rejoin them as he closed his phone. He came up beside Tony looking at his PDA. He then nodded quickly and looked up.

"Captain Lariman drives a 2004 black Buick LaCrosse," McGee said.

"Let's get these other numbers verified and then contact Gibbs," Tony said getting a little excited.

They spoke with most of the offices that showed up on Commander Conrad's phone records, each giving a legitimate reason for her to be calling. Most of them had to do with cases she was working on, or legal questions she was fielding for people on the base.

The only number they couldn't verify was the one for the two-star Admiral. They entered his office and came up to the Ensign sitting in front of the large oak door. The young woman looked up expectantly as she saw the three enter.

"Hi," Tony said with his charming smile. He went through introductions before getting to the point. "Is the Admiral in?"

"No. Admiral Kirkpatrick is out of town for the week," she said with a smile.

"Maybe you would know instead," Tony said sitting on the edge of her desk. She smiled up at him.

"I'd be glad to try," she replied.

"Would you know why Lt. Commander Johanna Conrad would be calling the Admiral's direct line from her home?"

"No I wouldn't," she said with a frown. "But I don't answer that line. Most calls come through the main line out here. That one is only given out by the Admiral himself. So if she was calling that number my guess is that they had business to discuss."

"What sort of business?" Ziva asked.

"Lt. Commander Conrad is a JAG lawyer. There was a case in which Admiral Kirkpatrick was keeping a close eye on. I remember him telling Commander Conrad to keep him informed."

"Does this happen often?" McGee asked.

"Yes, there are a lot of high ranking officers on base that keep an ear in the legal field. Helps them stay on top of things and be ready for the media."

"Thank you; do you know when the Admiral is expected?"

"Couple days, he's on a personal leave right now."

"Thank you for your time," Ziva said politely as the three made their way out of the office. Once outside they gathered by the car but no one got in. Tony drummed his finger on the top of the car as he thought about what they have learned. Ziva stood staring at the building down the road that served as Captain Lariman's office while McGee stared at the ground.

"Lariman is in Norfolk, I think that's where we should be," Tony said finally. Ziva looked at him and nodded in agreement. McGee slipped into the backseat of the car. Tony then dropped into the driver's seat while Ziva slipped into the passenger side.

"We should contact Gibbs," she said lightly and Tony nodded as he drove them back to the base housing. Once they were there they started to gather everything they had brought with them and Tony had McGee make arrangements for them to fly back to Washington. When they were almost ready to go Tony pulled his cell phone out once again to call Gibbs.

TBC…


	15. One More Day

**Chapter Fifteen: One More Day**

When Gibbs woke it was still dark outside. He checked the clock seeing it was just barely five in the morning. He rolled, remembering Nicole had climbed in bed with him a few hours ago, but found the bed empty. He sat up shaking the sleep from his head, before he pulled the covers back and went to the bathroom to change. He pulled on a pair of jeans and his old NIS sweatshirt.

He walked through his house to the kitchen where he turned on the coffee machine, searching for any sign of the eleven year old. He found none. The next stop was the guest bedroom, but that too was empty. He stood a moment in the doorway before turning and heading to the one place he hadn't checked, the basement.

He slowly came down the steps, scanning the room as he went. He spotted her when he was halfway down; she was under his boat lying on her side facing away from him. He quietly came up behind her and watched for a moment before leaning on the boat and looking at her face. She was asleep.

He went back upstairs and poured himself a cup of coffee when the machine was done, before heading back down to the basement. Taking up a seat on the couch he watched Nicole sleep, while sipping his coffee. His head swam with thoughts of her, mixing with thoughts of his dead daughter. His heart was in turmoil as he fought hard to maintain control over the emotions that had been bottled up for so long.

A couple hours passed with Gibbs sitting on the couch, lost in his own mind, while Nicole slept under his boat. She finally stirred, rolling onto her back and rubbing at her eyes. She glanced around the room as her brain slowly came out of the haze of sleep and she remembered where she was. Her eyes landed on Gibbs sitting on the couch, coffee cup in hand, eyes glazed over, staring at her, but not seeing. She could tell he was in a memory.

She slid to the end of the plywood, her movement jarring Gibbs back to the present. She saw the emotion that had been displayed in his eyes quickly evaporate as he realized she was awake. He smiled at her and set the coffee cup down on the table. She came up in front of him slowly, sliding the coffee cup to the side, taking a seat on the table facing him. Her small hands came down on his knees, as he tilted his head to the side swallowing hard.

"Why do you do that?" she asked. Gibbs looked at her confused. He had no idea what she was talking about. He didn't answer her. She locked eyes with him and studied him looking for any sign of emotion.

She got nothing in return from him. He was bottled up, hatches buttoned down tight, as he hid from his own demons. She felt her own fears and pain surfacing again as thoughts of her mother came to her. She didn't know how to speak about them either.

"I never knew my dad," she said finally looking down. She got up and flopped over on the couch leaning against the arm rest, ignoring the plume of dust. Gibbs followed her with his eyes but again said nothing, waiting for her to finish. She was quiet for a while before she continued.

"My mom always told me stories about him though. He died when she was one month pregnant with me. He was a marine, an officer. My mom said he was the best. That he was Recon. I remember her always bragging about him like he was just away on some mission, but he was gone. She never got over it.

"I always wondered what he was really like, so I would ask her. And she would tell me stories about how he never gave up, he never saw anything as impossible. She said he had a slight problem with authority and sometimes got in trouble because of it. I never got to meet him though, and my mom never got over him.

"You asked me why I didn't want to go with the people who were going to take me to foster care. I told you I didn't feel safe with them, but when I met you all the things my mom used to say about my dad seemed to fit you. I think he was a lot like you, Gibbs, I think that's why I…" she didn't finish. She turned her head away from him and stopped talking. Gibbs sat there not knowing what to do. After a long pause of silence she finally looked back at him with tears in her eyes.

"How do you miss someone you never met?" she asked quietly. Gibbs reached over and pulled her to him into a tight embrace. She snuggled closer to him and he softly stroked her shoulder. "I miss my mom, too," she said as fresh tears streamed down her face.

"I know, Kido," Gibbs said softly. "Death is never easy to deal with, specially when you're so young. And I don't think it gets any easier."

"Every time I close my eyes I see the faceless man coming after me, after he hurts my mom," she said in a whisper. "I don't want him to chase me anymore."

"The dreams will pass in time. I know it's hard right now," he said softly kissing the top of her head.

"Your dreams never passed," she whispered softly. Gibbs felt his own tears coming now and he picked his head up and looked at nothing across the room. She was right.

"They change. Become…bearable," he replied with a quiver to his voice, but he knew that wasn't the whole truth either. They still kept him up at night, they still consumed his sleeping hours, and they were still of the dead. They just were not of the brutal nature that makes one wake screaming at the top of their lungs, gasping for air, soaked in terror.

They were quiet now, neither one spoke. Nicole clung tightly to his side as he kept his arm around her shoulders. Her face was buried in his ribcage as he laid his on the top of her head. They took comfort from each other, chasing the dead away for just the slightest of moments. It was now that Gibbs thought about what Jen had said, that he only had one more day with this child before they took her from him. He figured this was the wrong time to tell her that news, instead he remained quiet.

He didn't know how much time had passed since they had sat down on the couch, but finally Nicole broke from him and reached for the remote. She pointed it to the television and started to change channels. Gibbs smiled.

"No CNN, Gibbs," Nicole said as she felt him shifting to reach for the remote. She looked up at him and grinned. He couldn't help but return it, nodding he decided one morning without CNN wouldn't kill him. He then removed his arm from around her and stood up. She looked up at him questioningly and he smiled back at her.

"How about breakfast?" Gibbs asked. She grinned and nodded so he turned and headed up the stairs to the kitchen. She continued to flip channels as there wasn't much on. Gibbs was about done fixing up the pancakes and bacon when he yelled for Nicole to join him in the kitchen. She came up quickly and grabbed the plates from the cupboard and placed them on the table, before getting silverware out of the drawer. Next she filled a glass of orange juice for herself, something she insisted he pick up when they were at the store yesterday and a cup of coffee for him.

Gibbs placed the food on the table and they both ate in silence. It was a comfortable silence and both knew they didn't need to break it. When they were done eating Nicole looked up at him.

"What?" he asked. She shrugged her shoulders.

"I'd like to change my clothes," she said looking down at what she was wearing. It had been two days now since she had changed. Gibbs nodded.

"I'll see if I can get you something," Gibbs said getting up from the table and leaving the room. Nicole went about cleaning up the table, rinsing the dishes and putting the left over food away in the fridge. It was five minutes later when Gibbs came back into the kitchen.

Nicole looked up at him from the sink. She saw the small smile playing on his lips and then turned back to what she was doing. Once she was finished cleaning up the plates she turned back to him.

"Fresh clothes are being delivered," he said.

"Thanks," she replied with a beaming smile.

Half an hour later there was a knock on the door and Nicole came up the stairs and pulled it open. Jen was standing there with a bag in hand, smile on her face. She held it out for Nicole who took it and looked inside. The child beamed up at Jen when she saw her own clothes in the bag.

"Come on in," Nicole said as she turned and headed for the bathroom. Before long she was in the shower while Jen went down the stairs to find Gibbs working on his boat. He looked up when he heard footsteps on the stairs, knowing the person was too heavy to be Nicole.

"Did you get the clothes?" he asked when he saw Jen standing in the middle of the stairs looking down on him.

"Yes. She's in the shower right now," she replied, coming down the rest of the way into the basement. "I talked to Ms. Dumont."

Gibbs stopped what he was doing, dropping the tool to the plywood. He paused a moment controlling the emotions and then turned to face her. "Yeah?"

"They found a home that is willing to take Nicole and help her deal with this tragedy," Jen said softly, watching him for any sign of emotion. Gibbs was a stone façade and nothing escaped.

"When do they come get her?" he asked quietly, feeling the pain internally of losing her. He wasn't sure when he had gotten so attached to the young child, but he knew now that she had a hold of his heart.

"Tonight, they are meeting me at six at NCIS," Jen replied stepping closer to him and reaching a gentle hand out for his arm. He watched as it made contact before looking up at her.

"You want me to bring her there?" Gibbs asked in a flat tone, his eyes cold.

"We can come here for her," Jen said. "Jethro, you knew this was the deal."

Gibbs continued to stare at her with emotionless eyes. They were cold and hard and it made Jen's heart ache. She squeezed her hand softly on his arm before dropping it. He gave her no response. She looked up at the top of the stairs quickly before returning her gaze to him.

"She needs to be in a stable environment right now, Jethro."

"You think I can't provide that for her?" Gibbs spat at her the anger growing in his chest. He was not incompetent; he could care for a child.

"Can you?" Jen asked searching his eyes.

"She's doing just fine right now isn't she?" Gibbs said leaning back against his boat, crossing his arms over his chest.

"What is it that made you connect with her?"

"She feels safe here, Jen, she isn't going to want to leave," Gibbs said ignoring Jen's question. He wasn't ready to say why this girl meant so much to him. He wasn't ready to admit why he would be able to handle her.

"How much experience do you have dealing with an eleven year old girl?" Jen asked shaking her head. "Jethro, maybe it's time to let someone else help her too."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Gibbs said through gritted teeth. He fought hard to keep the emotion running deep inside him from his face. He had all the experience he needed dealing with an eleven year old girl. Memories of Kelly flooded his mind and the pain surged through his body. Small flashes escaped through his eyes and Jen tilted her head to the side as she witnessed the struggle on his face.

"Jethro?" she asked softly not knowing what else to say. He didn't answer her he simply walked around her and headed up the stairs. He couldn't hold the wall up and he didn't want her to see what he was hiding. He wasn't ready to answer her questions, to tell his story, to let the demons run wild in his heart. The dead were chasing him and he needed to run.

Jen followed him up keeping a small distance between them. She could tell he was angry. She could tell he was hurting, but he was trying so hard to hide it all. When they got to the top they could hear the shower still running and Gibbs walked into the kitchen to the coffee machine. He poured himself the last cup and started to drink it. Jen leaned in the doorway of the kitchen and watched him not sure what to say. It wasn't long before they both heard the shower quit. Gibbs shut his eyes tight fighting to shove the memories down. He finally accomplished the task and turned to face Jen.

She noticed he was back to his old self when he turned to her. There was no emotion, no pain, not even any anger on his face. She was worried about him and she was sure it showed on her face. She stepped in the room a little further but then stopped.

"You can tell her she has to leave," Gibbs said before taking another gulp of coffee. He didn't think he could do that task. He wasn't sure he'd be able to say goodbye, knowing how Nicole would react when she finds out she has to leave. Jen nodded but didn't say anything. It wasn't long before Nicole came in the kitchen with a smile on her face. She saw the look on Gibbs' face and knew instantly something wasn't right. She looked up at Jen before looking back at Gibbs. No one spoke and it made her nervous but she didn't push the issue.

"I'll see you at six thirty," Jen said before turning and leaving the house. Gibbs didn't move, he followed her with his eyes until she was out of sight then finished his coffee and placed the mug in the sink. Nicole followed Jen out but didn't say anything. She watched the woman walk out the front door and then stood in the living room waiting for Gibbs. He finally came out to her.

"What's going on?" she asked the worry evident in her voice.

"Nothing, Kido, come on let's watch another one of your movies or something," Gibbs said with a strained voice. Nicole didn't move. She stared at Gibbs with hurt eyes and it made Gibbs tear up. He couldn't pretend with her and he knew it.

"They're taking me away," she said in a barely audible whisper and then the tears rolled down her cheeks. Gibbs felt his own cheeks getting wet as his vision blurred slightly. Nicole rushed towards him and wrapped her small arms around his waist. He kneeled down and her arms moved to his neck and she cried into his shoulder. Gibbs picked her up and took her down to the basement where he sat them both down on the couch.

Another hour passed in silence as Nicole clung to Gibbs. He was lost in memories that he didn't know how to escape. He had never really talked about them to anyone except on occasion with Ducky so many years ago. Something inside him made him start speaking, needing to release some of the pressure that was building.

"You asked me about Kelly," he said softly, his eyes focused on his boat. Nicole shifted so she could look up at him, noticing the pain in his eyes.

"And you told me about her," she said giving him an out. He tore his attention from the boat and looked down at the child next to him. He slowly nodded before continuing.

"I told you she was my daughter and that she was gone forever," Gibbs said. Nicole nodded but didn't say a word. She waited for him to continue, giving him the choice to go on or opt out. "She was twelve. I was working a case for NCIS. I'd been an agent for seven years. Things…went wrong on the case. The man…we were chasing a man that was abducting children from Naval bases.

"We were close to catching him. He knew we were on his trail," Gibbs continued, his voice low, shaky, and full of pain. Nicole was sitting still next to him, watching him, her eyes wide. "He took my daughter."

Gibbs had to stop as the pain in his heart escaped from the binds he had placed on it and it rocketed through his entire body. The tears blinded him and his throat wouldn't let his voice come out. Nicole's own tears were tumbling down her face as she wrapped her small arms around him and held onto him tightly. It was a while before Gibbs regained control and continued.

"He taunted me, called me, _told_ me he had her. We did our best to find her. I didn't sleep for…I don't even remember how long it was. When we found her she was still alive. I went in after her, just like he wanted me too. He used her to lure me into his trap. "I went after him in a blind fury, and he was ready. I took a bullet to my shoulder, knocking me down. It was then that he…" Gibbs stopped again looking up at the ceiling taking in a deep shaky breath. Nicole had her eyes closed now as she bit at her lip, tears blinding her, feeling his pain.

"Took her life," Gibbs finished in a whisper. He looked down at Nicole and pulled her into his lap, wrapping his arms around her. She pressed herself into his chest and held onto him. "I didn't grieve well. With the bullet I was not on active duty, I neglected those around me. I didn't notice the pain my wife was in. She left me too. Took too many pills."

After that they were both quiet as the ghosts danced around them. Gibbs felt exhausted after telling a story he hadn't repeated in years. He didn't know how much more he could handle as the memories replayed that fateful moment of him looking up after taking the bullet in the ball of his shoulder, rendering his right arm useless, his body going into shock, a feeling of numbness and cold engulfing him. He had just enough consciousness to look up, as the man who he was chasing killed his daughter in front of him.

Gibbs fell asleep holding Nicole on the couch as exhaustion finally overtook him. He dreamed of that day, trying to move, trying to stop the bullet, the knife, the death. He knew what was going to happen, the same movie played over and over, with no stop button on the remote. He was startled awake when he felt a hand grip his shoulder.

Opening his eyes he saw Nicole sitting next to him on the couch looking at him. He took a breath and squinted at her trying to clear the fog. She held his cell phone out to him as the ringing registered in his mind. He took it nodding and slowly stood from the couch.

"Gibbs," he said roughly into the phone. Tony noticed the strain but decided not to mention anything this time.

"Ah, it's Tony, Boss," he said instead trying to cover the concern in his voice. Gibbs chose to ignore it.

"Tell me you got something," Gibbs said noticing his throat was dry, he looked around for something to drink finding a can of grape pop he looked at Nicole who held it out to him. He smiled and accepted it taking a swig before handing it back to her.

"Yeah, this Captain Lariman owns a 2004 Buick LaCrosse and is in Norfolk. He went in a couple days ago and stays to the end of next week week. Training for a tour in Iraq," Tony said.

"This the mystery guy?"

"We think so. Fits in with motive if he is, plus he owns a dark sedan and he's close enough to town that he could have driven over and done it."

"You need to do anything more there?"

"Nope, we ran down the numbers on the phone records. Mostly just case related calls and the rest were fielding legal questions from people on base. Nothing on the payphone we haven't found anything on that one."

"Get back to DC, find this Lariman guy and see what you can come up with," Gibbs said sounding tired.

"Already booked the tickets, Boss."

"Keep on it and keep me informed," Gibbs said before ending the call and tossing the phone on the table. He looked at Nicole who gave him a smile. He decided he needed a shower and made his way upstairs to the bathroom.

TBC…


	16. Interrogation

**Chapter Sixteen: Interrogation**

The plane touched down and Tony, Ziva, and McGee made their way out to the parked car. They drove back to NCIS working the case as they did. It was nearing six o'clock in the evening now but they still decided to go out to Norfolk this evening yet to pick up Captain Lariman.

Director Shepard was in her office at five minutes until six when she heard the phone on her desk ring. She picked it up and listened as the person on the other side told her that Ms. Helen Dumont and her aid Carrie Allicks were here with Justin and Dawn Parks. The Director had her send them in and stood, walking around her desk as the door opened.

"Welcome," Jen said with a warm smile, even though she was feeling a dread in her stomach about taking the child away from Gibbs. She had seen the two together earlier in the day and knew there was something more going on between the two of them that she had no understanding of.

"Where is the child?" Helen asked curiously looking around the office. Jen cleared her thoughts and looked at the two people standing just inside the doorway.

"She isn't here we are going to go pick her up. You must be the foster parents," Jen said walking to them and extending her hand. They both nodded slowly. The man took her hand firmly and shook it.

"I'm Justin Parks, and this is my wife Dawn," he said softly. Jen let go of his hand and turned back to Helen Dumont. She had an unpleasant look on her face.

"I was told we were going to pick the child up at six," she said with a sigh.

"We didn't think it was a good idea to keep Nicole here. We thought she would be more comfortable in a home setting. An agent is watching her at his home."

"Surely not the one that caused this problem in the first place," she said stiffly. Jen resisted the urge to glare and instead put on a smile.

"Agent Gibbs has been watching over Nicole for two days now. Let's go and get her and get this done with," Jen said holding her hand out pointing at the doorway. Jen knew this was going to be difficult and heart breaking. She just hoped that these new foster parents really were ready for what they were going to receive.

As Jen followed the train of people down the stairs she noticed Gibbs' team coming into the bullpen and dropping items at their desks. They seemed to be chatting about the case. She told the party to go ahead and wait for her at the elevator that she needed to speak with the agents that just arrived.

"What did you find in California?" Jen asked as she approached McGee. Tony gave the Director a strange look and then turned away from her.

"Uh," McGee managed as he looked to Tony for help, but the senior agent was busying himself with a menial task to avoid the director. Ziva stepped up next to Jen.

"We may have found a lead," Ziva said with a nod. McGee's eyes grew larger and Ziva shrugged. Tony made a whimpering sound from his desk and shook his head when both McGee and Ziva looked over at him. Director Shepard smiled, loyal to the end she thought.

"How can it hurt, Tony, we already told Gibbs everything we know," Ziva spat at him in a harsh whisper. McGee thought a moment and then nodded his agreement.

"She's right, Tony, I mean Gibbs knows everything we do and if he were here he'd be telling the Director himself."

"Fine, but you two tell her," Tony said tossing his bag off the top of his desk to the floor and sitting heavily in the chair. "And make it quick we have a drive yet tonight."

"What kind of lead?" Jen asked quickly.

Ziva and McGee took turns quickly filling the director in on everything that they found in California and the plan to pick up Captain Lariman tonight to bring him to NCIS for interrogation on the matter. She listened intently and then nodded when they were finished.

"Good work," she said and turned away from them heading for the elevators and the group of people waiting for her.

Tony glared at Ziva and McGee and shook his head. They both shrugged and got ready to go to Norfolk. The drive was done in relative silence as they all contemplated the case; it was all falling together nicely. They arrived shortly before eight o'clock and made their way to the barracks where Captain Lariman was staying. They had phoned ahead and spoken to the CO getting all the information they needed to find Captain Lariman.

They found the man in his room sitting on his bunk reading a book. He seemed a little shocked when the three of them walked up next to him and stopped, staring down on him. He eyed them one by one before speaking.

"Can I help you?" he asked cautiously.

"I'm Special Agent DiNozzo, and this is Officer David and Special Agent McGee. We're here from NCIS to take you into custody for questioning on the murder of Lt. Commander Conrad," Tony said with a bit of venom in his voice. Captain Lariman's face dropped when he heard what he had said and the man seemed to sink further into the bunk.

"What? Johanna…she was murdered?" he asked.

"Nice try, come on," Tony said grabbing his arm and leading him from the room. McGee and Ziva did a search of his area coming up empty before heading to the car. Tony and Ziva sat up front while McGee sat in the back with a hand cuffed Captain Lariman. The drive back to NCIS was done in complete silence as Lariman stared out the window. McGee watched him seeing the emotions float across the other man's face.

Once back at Headquarters they lead the marine to an empty interrogation room and left him, then the three of them met in the observation room. They watched him through the glass.

"What's your strategy, Tony?" McGee asked, but Tony ignored him, leaving the room and then reappearing on the other side of the glass. He sat down at the table ignoring the Captain, who was still sitting calmly, with a sad expression on his face, after a few moments Tony looked up.

"How would you classify your relationship with Lt. Commander Conrad?" Tony asked in an even tone.

"Classify my relationship? I was in love with her," he said softly. "It was rocky but I think we could have worked it out."

"Did you go to her home two days ago to work it out?" Tony asked.

"No, I haven't seen her since she left California; it was a few days before. I've been here for four days and before that she told me we needed a break. Is she really dead?"

"Where were you two days ago?"

"I was at Norfolk. I was training all day then we had sit down that night learning about explosives."

"How long have you known Lt. Commander Conrad?"

"I met Johanna almost a year ago. We became friends and after a few months it became more than friends. She was leery of a relationship though. She…she was still hung up on her husband. We were trying to work around it. She never wanted me to meet her daughter but we were getting to that as well. I think we were making progress and then all the sudden she says we need a break and she's been transferred."

"How was your relationship? Lots of problems?"

"Look I told you, she had issues about moving past her husband but we…she was coming to terms. I can't believe she's gone," he said with sadness.

"Why were you stalking her in the three months prior to her transfer?"

"Stalking her? I wasn't," he said incredulously.

"You own a 2004 black Buick LaCrosse four dour sedan?" Tony asked.

"Yeah, it's the vehicle I drive when back on base in San Diego," he said with a sigh.

"A car matching that description was seen on multiple occasions driving by, slowing down, and stopping in front of the Conrad residence in California."

"It wasn't me. Johanna told me about that car. I was trying to figure out who it was but she wouldn't tell me. She didn't want to bother me with it."

"She knew it was you that's why she said she needed the transfer, Captain Lariman. That's what she told Commander Betz."

"I wasn't stalking her. I was trying to find out who was! Besides I had no idea she was being transferred. She sprung that on me at dinner the same fucking night she told me we needed a break," he said as the anger gathered inside him.

"You have problems controlling your anger, Captain Lariman?" Tony asked sitting back in the chair with a smile.

"No. Listen to me I had nothing to do with her death. I would NEVER hurt that woman. She is everything to me."

"Which is why when she said she was done with you, you broke and came after her."

"No."

"And then you stabbed her repeatedly until you dealt the fatal blow to the heart," Tony continued.

"I didn't," he said weakly battling the tears.

"Where is the murder weapon?"

"What murder weapon? How should I know? You got the wrong guy," he said with anger again.

Tony stood abruptly and walked from the room. Captain Lariman followed him with his eyes shaking his head. Tony came around and entered the observation room coming up behind Ziva and McGee.

"I don't know, Tony," McGee said. "He seems pretty shocked."

"He's faking, McGee, he has to be. Everything says it's him. She ended the relationship, he couldn't handle it. Came out here under the guise of being at Norfolk, drove to her new house and confronted her. She told him to get out of her life and then he killed her. His car fits the stalker, it fits with her saying someone on base was making it hard to raise her daughter the way she wanted to. If he was pushing to meet her daughter then she felt threatened. We just need the murder weapon."

"Now what?" Ziva asked.

"Let him sit overnight, maybe Gibbs can interview him in the morning," Tony said with a shrug. "We have enough circumstantial evidence to hold him. He's the only lead we have right now. Let's be thorough about it."

Tony then turned and left the room for the bullpen with Ziva on his heels. McGee made arrangements for Captain Lariman to be detained for the rest of the night and then joined Ziva and Tony, where they decided to call it a night.

TBC…


	17. The Last Few Hours

**Chapter Seventeen: The Last Few Hours**

Gibbs came out of the bathroom after his shower feeling a little refreshed, but the thought of what was to come later in the evening still gnawed at his mind. He went down into the basement to find Nicole watching television. She looked up when she saw him come down the stairs. He sat down next to her not making eye contact.

She put the remote out in front of her and clicked the off button causing the TV to go blank. Gibbs stared at the black screen as if it were still running pictures across it. Nicole stared at him waiting for him to look at her; instead he rose and walked to his boat. She tossed the remote onto the table in front of her and it slid to the front before crashing to the floor. The noise caused Gibbs to glance over his shoulder briefly. She gave him a look and shook her head when he turned away.

"Don't ignore me," she said in a whisper. Gibbs closed his eyes and tried to clear his head of all the jumbled images he was seeing. He turned and leaned against the boat, draping his right arm along the wood.

"I'm sorry," he said shaking his head. She got up and walked up to him standing next to him leaning on the boat. Her arms came together across her chest as she stared up at him.

"What time are they coming?" she asked softly.

"Six thirty," he replied rubbing a hand over the back of his neck.

"We could…not be here…" she said with a grin. Gibbs looked down at her, a grin slipping over his own features.

"Gave my word," he said. Nicole nodded but continued to grin.

"To the Director?" she asked looking back up at him, grin still firmly in place. Gibbs studied the eleven-year-old's face for a moment.

"Yes," he said evenly.

"What's the deal between you two anyway?"

"Deal?"

"Come on! Gibbs, there is serious history between you two," Nicole replied shaking her head and walking back to the couch. She sat down watching him as he still stood against the boat.

"What do you know about history," Gibbs replied calmly.

"I know how she looks at you. I see how she reacts around you, watches you. I see the way you look at her," Nicole began.

"You don't know what you're talking about, Kido."

"On the contrary, Gibbs. Come on admit it. You like the woman," Nicole said. Gibbs flashed her a look and it made her giggle. He walked over to the couch and she smiled more as he came closer. He sat down next to her and grabbed her tickling her again. She laughed and kicked until he stopped.

"What do you know, you're eleven," he said finally with a grin.

"Apparently more than you do," she said giggling again. Gibbs narrowed his eyes and shook his head before sitting back on the couch and laying his head on the top. Nicole got up on her knees and leaned on her elbow next to his head.

"So what should we do, Kido," Gibbs asked closing his eyes. "We got a couple hours."

"You are so stubborn," Nicole said with a sigh, eliciting a look from Gibbs. "I'd say you two were an item, yeah, in the past, but now you work for her."

"Drop it," Gibbs said with a smile as he went to tickle her. Nicole saw it coming and scrunched her body. Gibbs couldn't get to the ticklish spots, as she deflected his attempts with her elbows.

"Let's see, you ended it…no she did and you," Nicole continued before Gibbs cut her off.

"Don't you ever quit, Kid?" Gibbs said grabbing her and pulling her into him. She smiled up at him.

"You shouldn't bottle stuff up, Gibbs. That's why it haunts you. You know someone told me I should talk about things it makes stuff easier."

"Stop throwing my own words in my face," Gibbs said with a grin. He hugged Nicole and she was quiet for a moment before she pushed again.

"So what's the deal?"

"Child," he said in a warning tone but she just looked up at him with an innocent look. Gibbs shook his head and tossed her to the other side of the couch. She landed with a grin as a puff of dust erupted. "I got to say you are persistent. If I'm still an agent in seven years, you got a spot on my team," he said with a laugh.

"You like to change the subject a lot," Nicole said creeping closer to him again. He rubbed his hand along his neck again before looking at the child that never quit. When he looked into her eyes he saw that for a moment she was actually forgetting her situation and it made his heart lift just the tiniest bit, and like before he didn't know why he did, but he started to tell her the back story.

"Yes we were partners a while back," Gibbs said finally.

"Partners, like back me up partners?"

"She was my NCIS partner and we were on assignment."

"And? Come on Gibbs, don't give me that look!"

"And yeah there was a connection."

"You WERE more than partners. I knew it!" Nicole said beaming like she had won the lottery. It made Gibbs laugh.

"This is a really big thing for you isn't it?"

"How many people can make you talk? Huh? I think this is like Christmas," she said with a laugh. Gibbs shook his head.

They spent the next hour talking about Gibbs past with the director. He couldn't believe he was sharing this with an eleven year old he had met only 48 hours ago, but something about her made him want to share his life with her. They had been quiet for a while when Nicole looked up at him again.

"Who ended it?" she asked softly not sure how he would react. Gibbs looked down at her briefly before looking back up at his boat.

"She did," he said with a shrug. "Guess I was too much of a bastard."

Nicole didn't reply to him. He got up from his spot and paced around the room. Nicole watched him just enjoying the moment. Finally she couldn't contain her curiosity any longer and she once again opened her mouth.

"And now?"

"And now what?" he asked looking at her over his shoulder.

"What's your relationship like now?"

"She's my boss, my ex-partner, my friend," he said quickly, a little too forced and Nicole picked up on it.

"Your choice or hers?"

"Mutual, come on, Kido, let's talk about something else," Gibbs said with a sigh.

Nicole read the drain in his voice and knew it was time to move on. She nodded. She knew what was coming but she didn't want to be the one to start the conversation. He watched her a moment before he came back to the couch and sat down.

"You ready to go to a foster home?" he asked draping an arm over her shoulders. She shrugged and pulled her knees to her chest wrapping her arms around them leaning her chin down. She fought to hold the tears.

"I don't want to," she said.

"I know but you know you have to right? They won't let me keep you."

"Why not?" she asked picking her head up and looking up at him.

"I'm never around, Kido," he said rubbing his arm along her shoulders.

"You've been around for two days," she said quietly.

"Yeah, but this is different. My team is still working and I should be out there with them," he said. "That's my job. I'm a field agent."

Nicole didn't answer, she understood what he was saying; she just didn't like it. They were quiet for a while longer while they both thought about different things. Nicole then shifted so her legs were lying along the couch and settled in against Gibbs' chest. He held her tight.

"It's always been just me and mom, Gibbs. I don't know what to do anymore," she said quietly. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

"You'll figure it out. It's not going to be easy though," he replied.

"What if I have a nightmare?"

"Your foster family will help you deal with them."

"But they don't understand them, not like you do," she said looking up at him. He looked away, and Nicole looked back down at the table.

"I have too many demons of my own to work out, Kido," Gibbs said half heartedly.

"You don't really feel that way," she said with a hint of anger in her voice. Gibbs squeezed a little tighter. "This so isn't fair."

"Life isn't fair," Gibbs mumbled softly. "You just have to deal with what it gives you."

"You won't let me," she whispered and then tried to pull away from him. He held onto her causing her to flop back against his chest. She looked up at him and saw the pain in his eyes. She realized how much it would affect him when she was gone. She leaned back.

"It's not my choice."

They were quiet for a while before Nicole pried herself from his arm and got up. He watched her walk up to the DVD player and put in another movie. She then disappeared up the stairs and he got up and followed her. Gibbs found her in the kitchen making popcorn and pulling out a couple cans of grape soda. He smiled.

"Might as well enjoy the last couple hours, right?" she asked looking over her shoulder at him, making Gibbs nod. The popcorn was done and Nicole was pouring it into a bowl when Gibbs' cell phone rang. He pulled it out and checked the caller ID, frowning slightly when he saw Ducky.

"Yeah, Duck," he said as he flipped it open. He motioned for Nicole to go ahead with the movie and she disappeared down his basement steps with the popcorn and a can of soda.

"Was just calling to see how you were doing, Jethro, haven't seen you here in a few days," Ducky said over the phone. Gibbs could hear the underlying worry in his friend's voice.

"Things are ok, Duck," Gibbs said leaning against the counter.

"Are you sure? Having an eleven year old again," Ducky continued.

"Yeah brought up memories," Gibbs said closing his eyes as he cut the older man off. They were both silent a moment before Ducky continued.

"You really should talk about these things, Jethro. It's not healthy to bottle all that emotion up and keep it inside."

"I did, Ducky, I…I told the kid about Kelly…and Shannon," Gibbs said quietly.

"My, my, Jethro, a little rough on the girl wouldn't you say?"

"She wanted to know. Look it was…I…kept calling her Kelly," he finished softly. Ducky was nodding on his end, even though Gibbs couldn't see him.

"You sound tired, Jethro," Ducky said to break the silence.

"I'll be ok," he said not sure how to continue the conversation.

"Don't hide from the emotions, let them out. I've been telling you for years you need to speak of these things to someone else."

"What like a shrink? No thanks, Duck."

"To anyone," Ducky finished quietly. Gibbs knew he was right, he just wouldn't admit it out loud. There was a pause before Ducky switched gears. "How is the young one dealing with what she witnessed?"

"She's having nightmares. A faceless man hurts her mom then comes after her. She's hurting but I think she's strong enough to come through. The foster parents are supposed to be able to handle this thing I guess."

"Foster parents?"

"Director Shepard arranged for it. Coming tonight to pick up the kid," Gibbs said, not being able to help the sorrow that crept into his voice. Ducky noticed it immediately.

"Jethro, you can't keep this child. Not in the current lifestyle you have. Your job as senior field agent doesn't allow the time to be a single parent."

"I know, Duck," Gibbs said working hard to hold his tears in check, clenching his eyes tightly and closing his fist not holding the phone.

"Do you?" Ducky asked with concern.

"I know, ok? I understand I can't raise a child…on my own," he said as a little bit of anger crawled into his words. Ducky was silent again. They stood for a while thinking about what the other had said.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow then," Ducky said finally. Gibbs grunted into the phone before snapping it closed. He stood for a while staring at the wall before pushing from the counter and heading for the doorway. He stopped dead in his tracks when he spotted Nicole standing there watching him.

Neither spoke, just continued to stare at each other, Gibbs' mind racing to figure out how much she heard. Nicole seemed to recognize the worry in his face as she stepped forward coming up in front of him and stopping.

"It's ok, Gibbs," she said softly. "I understand."

Gibbs looked around his counter and grabbed a pen and piece of paper. He scribbled down the house line and his cell line before holding it out for her. "Take this."

Nicole stepped forward and accepted the piece of paper from him, looking at it before glancing up at him. "What's this?"

"My numbers call me if you need anything, no matter when," he said with a smile.

With that she turned and walked from the room, grabbing the second can of grape soda. Gibbs poured himself a coffee and made his way down to the basement. Nicole was already on the couch with another movie playing. Gibbs grabbed the box and read it quickly. They were watching The Italian Job.

The movie was just about over when Gibbs heard the knock on the front door. He felt Nicole stiffen slightly. Dread rushed through his body as he removed himself from Nicole and walked up the steps slowly. He opened his front door to find an army of people headed by Director Shepard. It was time. He felt like someone had punched him in the stomach, repeatedly. He turned allowing the people to come in, his eyes never leaving Jen's.

"Agent Gibbs, this is Justin and Dawn Parks, they are going to take Nicole Conrad," Jen said introducing them. Gibbs simply nodded noticing the unhappy look of one Ms. Helen Dumont. He didn't care. He turned from them all without a word and headed down the basement steps. Director Shepard decided it would be best if they all waited for him to come up again.

Gibbs came to the bottom of the stairs and leaned on the railing looking at Nicole. She stopped the movie then looked up at him. He tilted his head towards the top of the stairs and she let her eyes drift in that direction. She then slowly got up from the couch and walked towards him. She felt the tears starting and it tore at Gibbs heart. They came up the stairs together, Nicole looking from face to face of the strangers about to take her away.

Gibbs stopped and kneeled down so he was shorter than Nicole and looked at her. He had his back to the hoard of people on in his house. Jen watched as he and Nicole embraced for a moment. When they pulled apart Nicole brought her small hands up to each side of his jaw letting them rest there gently. Gibbs closed his eyes.

"Don't let them chase you anymore, Gibbs," she said softly. "They don't want to haunt you; you just won't let them go."

He looked up at her then with sadness in his eyes. He licked his dry lips before he answered her. "I will."

She smiled and leaned in close, resting her chin next to his ear. She glanced up and saw Director Shepard watching them with curiosity. "Talk to her," Nicole whispered in his ear so only he heard and then she pulled back and smiled. Gibbs narrowed his eyes at her before grinning back and dropping his head.

He then stood and the two approached the group waiting for them. Nicole settled back against Gibbs as he rested his hands on her shoulders. She looked up at him and he nodded. Director Shepard stepped in and smiled.

"Nicole, this is Justin and Dawn Parks."

The girl remained where she was but smiled politely up at the two people beaming back at her. She didn't want to leave, but Gibbs was right the two CPS workers would never let her stay with him.

"Hi," the woman named Dawn said stepping forward. Nicole shrunk back slightly, leaning into Gibbs a little more. He tightened his hands slightly and Nicole looked up. He nodded for her to move forward and the girl took a small step.

"We're going to take you home," Justin said softly and Nicole only nodded. She felt burdened and knew she wouldn't be happy. She went with them as the party started for the door. Nicole stopped in the doorway and looked back at Gibbs one last time. She gave a slight wave with a sad smile and Gibbs felt the tears leak from his eyes as she walked away from him.

Jen was standing to his right and watched the scene unfold and knew there was something more going on between the child and Gibbs that she didn't understand. There was a connection that ran deeper than she could imagine and from the condition Gibbs was in there was more heartache than a girl with a dead mother. He looked at her and she quickly walked to him wrapping her arms around him. He leaned his face to her shoulder as the silent tears ran down his face.

"It's ok, Jethro," she said softly. He pulled his head back, resting his chin on her shoulder and taking a shuttering breath he answered her.

"No, it's not."

TBC…


	18. Every Little Thing

**Chapter Eighteen: Every Little Thing**

Nicole sat in the backseat of the car staring out the window. She hadn't spoken a word since they had left Gibbs' house, even though both Dawn and Justin had attempted to converse with her. She learned she was going to a house in a nice neighborhood and that these people most likely came from money. There were also three other children in the house, and these people somehow thought another girl her age would make this burden less on her.

She didn't bother to tell them that she was used to being an only child, that she didn't need another child to comfort her. She simply ignored them as she thought about the last forty-eight hours or so. She couldn't help the image of her mother creeping back into her conscious mind. Her fingers tightened over the scrape of paper in her pocket, numbers to a lifeline she thought.

The two in the front didn't take the hint and continued to talk. Nicole was already annoyed with them, but their meaningless rambles helped to occupy her brain with something while she mourned the loss of another loved one. She wasn't sure when it had happened but she knew she had connected on a different level with Agent Gibbs.

Finally they pulled into a driveway, leading up to a large house, in a stellar neighborhood. Nicole climbed from the backseat and stood next to the car looking around. It was hard to notice anything since it was dark but she got the feel for the place instantly. She didn't think she would like it here. Dawn came up beside her and motioned that she go in the house. After a brief pause she finally pushed from the car and slowly walked into the house through the front door.

She was immediately greeted by another woman who smiled at the two adults as they came in. There were three other kids, two younger and one about the same age as her, sitting quietly in the room doing various things. Two of them brightened when they saw the couple come in behind her, the third simply stared at Nicole. It annoyed her but she just ignored the child.

"Mandy, Derrick, and Ricky, this is Nicole," Dawn said in a cheery voice that made Nicole want to kick her in the shin. The three children looked at her with smiles on their face; Nicole faked one in return then looked down. She didn't want to be here, she felt like crying.

Derrick and Ricky, she wasn't sure which was which, looked younger than her. Nicole's best guess was they were six or seven. Mandy was probably close to her own age, but Nicole didn't care. She didn't want a friend; it wasn't what she was looking for. She looked up at Dawn.

"Where's my room, I'm tired," Nicole said half heartedly. Dawn frowned but then led her through the house and up a flight of stairs to a room on the second floor. She opened the door and Nicole groaned internally as she saw two beds, one obviously used, in the room. Mandy was right behind them. Nicole walked to the open bed and sat down on it. She decided it would do and lay back onto the pillows.

"I'll leave you two alone," Dawn said with a smile. Nicole ignored her as Mandy smiled in return. The door slid shut and Nicole sat up and looked around. She felt the emotions building again, but wouldn't crack. She made that promise to herself. Mandy came over and sat down next to her.

"Hi, I'm Mandy," she said with a smile. Nicole wanted to smack the girl but decided it would be a bad start. They had to share a room now. She took a deep breath, plastered a fake smile on her face, and nodded.

"Nicole," she said.

"They told us what happened, I'm sorry," Mandy said. Nicole looked away; she didn't want a stranger's sympathy. She scanned the room again but didn't see a phone. She would have to use one out in the main house if she would call the numbers. She fingered the paper again, wanting desperately to call him. She felt like the monsters were getting closer.

"I'm really tired," Nicole said with a weak smile. Mandy nodded and left the room as Nicole lay on the bed hugging her new pillow. It was then she allowed herself to cry, burying her face into the fluff of the pillow to muffle her sobs. She felt alone for the first time since Agent Gibbs walked into her life after her mother had been killed.

Nicole feel asleep crying, holding her pillow tightly willing herself to wake up from this bad dream, to find herself in the basement. She wanted it all to be a sick joke and Gibbs was really just downstairs sanding his boat. She knew that wasn't true. She was here to stay, it was her new home. It felt wrong, but that's what she fell asleep to…her new home.

* * *

Abby was sifting through the belongings that had been brought back from the Conrad residence after the murder. She had been slowly going through the boxes for two days now as the rest of the team chased the case to California, well except Gibbs. She cut the tape on another box and pulled up the top.

Inside she found stacks of file folders. She pulled the first one up and saw the contents were notes on one of her cases. Abby quickly flipped through it but found nothing more of interest. The next two files were the same as the first, legal notes on cases that were either pending or closed. The fourth file was different though.

When Abby first opened it she squinted at the contents in confusion. Where the other files had been well thought out sentences and flowery language, this folder contained documents in a cryptic short hand or code. Abby flipped through the rest of the file and every single document was in the same script. She frowned and looked at the clock. She didn't know if anyone was up in the bullpen yet but she thought she would check before calling the Bossman at home.

When she came into the bullpen she thought she had missed everyone but then McGee popped up from below his desk in his chair. Abby ran over to him, startling him. She put the folder down in front of him and pointed at it.

"What's up, Abby?" he asked cautiously. Abby gave him a look, shaking her head, making her pig tails bounce.

"I don't know, Tim, look at it though. It's all in some weird code. The rest of the folders in the box were clean written flowery legal crap," Abby said with a shrug. McGee looked at what she was pointing at and frowned. He didn't recognize the short hand.

"Where'd you get this?" he asked turning the page so he could read it more.

"It came in with the other stuff from the Conrad house," Abby said. "What do you think it means?"

"I don't know, but we need to find out. Maybe someone she worked with would know her short hand code."

"It's too late to call the office here," Abby said looking at the clock.

"Yeah, it's pretty late in California too, besides I don't think anyone here would know it. I'll call and leave a message for someone to get back to us ASAP from San Diego."

"You think it's just another case that she hadn't written up her formal notes on?"

"Could be, but Gibbs said to be thorough on this one. I'll see if I can get it…translated," he said as he picked up his phone and dialed the California base. He routed his call to Lt. j. g. Michelle Pearce and waited. He got her voice mail and he left her a brief message asking her to contact him in the morning.

"Just a message, huh," Abby said a little disappointed. McGee nodded. He was tired and looked up. Tony and Ziva were already gone for the night. He turned to Abby and smiled.

"I'm exhausted, let's get out of here," he said standing up and slinging his backpack over his shoulder. Abby nodded slightly and then headed towards the lab to get her things with McGee on her heels.

* * *

_A darkness she had never experienced surrounded her. She couldn't see where she was running to or where she had come from. She had seen him, he had no face. He pushed that knife into her mother over and over and she couldn't stop him. She stood in horror and watched as the redness spread. It consumed everything, colored the darkness, and took away the life from her mother. _

_She screamed, but all that did was draw his attention. His featureless face turned to her slowly holding the knife in his hand. It dripped, slowly dripped red, to the floor. Her mother's blood. She watched in fascinated horror, unable to mover her feet. They were cemented to the floor. _

_Finally he moved towards her and she turned. Her heart felt like it was about to explode, and she couldn't move her feet fast enough. RUN! She thought but her feet moved in slow motion. He was catching her, the man without a face. All she could do was scream. Why wouldn't anyone help her!_

_The red was all around her now, it was overtaking her. It was upon her. She couldn't move anymore, the redness had trapped her feet. She fought viciously, thrashing and punching, kicking and jerking. Nothing worked and she felt him coming closer. He was right behind her now and she was trapped._

_She screamed again as the man with no face bent down with the knife in hand. He was thrusting it forward when someone grabbed her shoulder. She screamed again in complete terror as she was unable to escape the man. His grip tightened…_

Nicole sprang forward with a gasp, tears soaking her face, sweat soaking the rest of her. She was completely disoriented, terrified, and out of breath. There was a strange figure next to her speaking but she didn't hear them. She pulled her shoulder from their grasp and shrunk to the corner of her bed. Her first instinct was to run. The man was going to get her.

She leaped from the bed around the startled figure and headed for the door. She tripped over something on the floor and stumbled forward hitting her head on the corner of the dresser. She felt the skin split but didn't care. She fumbled in the dark and yanked the door open. She was lost, in a strange house, not sure if she was awake or still dreaming. Her only thought was to find Gibbs.

She heard a voice behind her but it only motivated her to move further from it. She was scared, but slowly her senses were returning. She remembered leaving Gibbs and coming to a new house, she remembered the new people, her foster parents and she stopped running. She fell to her knees with a sob as more doors opened in the house. There was someone beside her now and she looked up through blurry tear filled eyes into the face of a stranger.

She cried harder now. She didn't have anyone anymore; they had taken it all away from her. And the man with no face still chased her at night. A hand came to her shoulder and she felt the stinging in her eye. She felt something trickle down her face and she collapsed against the body next to her.

"Shhh," someone said to her as arms wrapped around her. "It was just a bad dream."

But somehow it wasn't comforting. It wasn't the same. It didn't chase the demons away; it didn't make her feel safe. No one called her Kido, or even Kelly. He wasn't there to help anymore. She cried harder and it made her eye hurt more. Whoever had a hold of her didn't know what to do to calm her. She heard someone tell the others to go back to their rooms. It didn't matter. She was haunted and they didn't know what to do.

"Nicole, it was just a dream, honey, it's ok now," a woman's voice soothed her, a hand gently rubbing her back. She couldn't stop crying. The woman was trying desperately to console her, comfort her, and help her, but it wasn't helping. Nicole shuttered as she breathed. She couldn't see out of her right eye, the skin around it swelling from the impact. She felt something cold being placed over it and pulled back.

"It's ok, it will help," Justin's voice said softly. She let the cold pack be put in place. She wanted her mother, but knew that couldn't happen, so her heart turned to a grumpy silver haired agent of the NCIS next. But they took him away too. Now she must face the man who chased her with people who didn't know how to stop him.

A few hours later they had her calmed down enough to put her back in her room…with just Mandy as company. Nicole felt the tears coming down her face as she was afraid to close her eyes, no one had chased him away, if she shut her eyes, he was waiting. The red was waiting. She didn't want to see it anymore.

TBC…


	19. Getting to Know You

**Chapter Nineteen: Getting to Know You**

Gibbs pulled away from Jen, standing for a moment before heading back to his basement. He didn't say anything, and Jen made the decision to stay on her own. She followed him down and found him on the couch staring at nothing. She sat down next to him laying her hand softly on his shoulder.

He was in a state that she had never experienced with him. He was no longer strong on the outside; the inner feelings of his heart were expressed on his face. He was devastated, the feelings of his past no longer prisoner.

"Jethro," she said softly, concerned with his current condition, feeling the old feelings resurface as he showed his soul in his eyes. It was something he had never done before, part of the reason why she had told him enough so long ago.

He didn't answer her, just continued to stare at the blank television screen, lost in the memories of the last two days, and many years before. All mingling together in a blur of motion, making him want it all to stop. Jen applied a little more pressure to her hand, trying to shake him from the trance he was in. Nothing seemed to work.

"Jethro, are you ok?" she asked feeling slightly stupid for it. It was obvious to her he was not ok, but she didn't know what else to say. Something had happened in the last two days that had bonded him with a stranger, an eleven year old stranger. A bond so strong it caused emotional distress when it was broken and the child removed.

They were quiet for a while, as Jen's arm snaked further around his shoulders. He leaned into her without word, slowly coming to lean his head on her shoulder. He had his eyes closed and Jen thought he had fallen asleep from exhaustion when he finally spoke to her in a whisper so low she almost didn't hear him.

"You asked me once if I've ever considered having children," he said with his eyes still closed, voice so low even he wasn't sure if the sound was real or not. Jen looked at him a moment before composing her answer.

"And you asked me if it was an offer," she replied, but got no response from him. He waited a pause, trying to defeat the monsters in his head before speaking again.

"There's something you don't know about me," he said softly. Jen leaned her head on his and ran her hand along his arm. "There's a part of my life no one knows, except Ducky."

Jen thought about everything they had shared as partners, as lovers seven years ago, not being surprised that Ducky knew something more than she did about the man next to her. She knew about his wife Diane, she knew about his wife Kristen, but she didn't even know his first wife's name she thought. She knew how the other marriages ended, the anger and resentment from the women, but the first one he never spoke of.

"I used to have a daughter, Jen," he said softly, his eyes still closed. Jen was shocked by his confession, unable to reply to him. She held him tighter then as she knew this was extremely difficult for him to mention. He moved his legs so they stretched out along the couch, causing his head to drop from her shoulder to her lap. Her right hand traced his shoulder, down along the top of his ribs, and back up again, while her left hand slid gently through his hair.

There was another long pause, Jen not knowing what to say and Gibbs pondering how much to share. The last words Nicole said to him floated through his head again, _don't let them haunt you _and _talk to her_. He knew what she meant, he needed to talk through his pain, to express the love and hurt that was mixed up in his heart, to let someone else in to share the burden of the loss.

For the first time since his first wife died he felt the urge to open his heart to another woman, letting them in to see his inner demons. He was scared of the moment, and feared the pain it would most likely cause in the future, but at the same moment, relished in the thought of having someone next to him again.

"She was twelve," he continued. Jen looked down at him, her arm still drawing the large circle. The one on his head had stopped, resting gently on the back of it. "I was on a case, a junior agent with only seven years experience. I was reckless, I thought I was invincible."

He was expressing his feelings of this time frame for the first time. He had never really spoken to Ducky about it either and he felt the need to expel what was inside him. He opened his eyes and turned so he could look up at her. He found her staring right back at him, compassion filling her eyes, tears building but not falling.

"We were chasing a child molester. He was abducting children from Naval bases on the east coast. We were close to catching him, so close he turned the tables on us. He took my daughter," Gibbs said in a low whisper. He paused again not having the strength to continue, but the ghosts of his wife and daughter appeared in his mind again and he knew he needed to let them go, so they could stop haunting him.

"He called me at the office, gloating. Told me he had Kelly, told me I would never see her again. I was enraged and terrified at the same time. We found him in an abandoned building and Kelly was there. I could see her just inside the door. I disobeyed orders. They never should have let me go. I charged into the building, but it was what he wanted. He was waiting for me," he said as the tears escaped his eyes and ran down his face. He had shifted again so he wasn't looking up at Jen, but he had a feeling she was crying as well.

"The bullet hit me in the shoulder, made my arm useless instantly. I felt my hand go numb, and my shoulder throb. The blood was warm running down my arm. I remember it so clearly," he continued his hand flexing involuntarily. Jen remembered the scar on his shoulder. "I sat there in the doorway to the room and watched that man kill my daughter. I saw her bleed to death."

Gibbs had to stop at this point. He couldn't make his voice work, his throat was hard and his vision had given way to the blur of tears. Jen wrapped her arms around him tightly and held him while he let it out. She too was crying now as she shifted so she could lean down as she placed a light kiss on his temple. It was a few minutes before he could continue.

"She died in front of me. Then everyone else came charging in and I watched the man who killed my daughter die while I stared him in the eye. I saw his last breath, but it did nothing to ease the pain," he said in a hoarse whisper. "They put me on medical leave while my shoulder healed. I didn't grieve well. I was a bastard, I know that, but I was in pain. I blamed myself, thought of myself as a complete failure.

"My wife Shannon, she took it hard. I think she just wanted me to stand next to her, acknowledge she was hurting too. But I couldn't," he went on shakily. "I ignored her. I ignored her pain, only thinking of my own. I in a sense abandoned her, and she left me. She took too many of the pills they gave her to calm her. She took too many and I found her in the bed the next morning."

He was silent then. His story was told. Jen didn't know what to say so she only held him as they both cried for the dead. Gibbs closed his eyes once again and tried to push the pain and grief from his body. He felt a little easement after sharing and knew that Nicole was right, they didn't haunt him because they wanted to, it was simply he couldn't let them go.

After a while Gibbs sat up as Jen's arms dropped from around him. He looked at her knowing he looked like a train wreck. He noticed that she too had been crying as he stood and walked away from her. He went to his boat, picked up a plane but didn't put it to wood. He stood with it in his hand staring at it like it held all the answers. He heard Jen get up from the couch but didn't turn around.

She walked across the room and stopped just behind him. She reached out and lightly placed a hand on his shoulder blade and left it there, letting him choose. He took a deep breath and then finally turned to face her. Her hands came up to cup his face and he stared at her with intense blue eyes. She had never seen so much emotion in them.

"Nicole took Kelly's place," she said softly watching his eyes for his reaction. He stared at her as his emotions betrayed him through his eyes and he knew all he could do was nod. "She filled the hole in your heart."

"Yes," he said softly looking over at the table seeing the can of grape soda.

"Why did you share your story with me tonight?" Jen asked in a whisper. Gibbs looked at her and pondered her question, not entirely sure why he had taken this moment to tell it other than the fact that Nicole had told him too.

"Nicole made me realize that I was haunted by the dead because I hung onto them. You ended our relationship with me because like every other woman I've been with since Shannon I've closed myself off. I don't let others get close. If they aren't close, they can't hurt you in the end," he said looking her in the eye.

"It was painful to be next to you every day and know there was more, much more to you but you wouldn't let me see it," Jen said in return. Gibbs slowly nodded.

"I know. I built a wall to guard my inner heart. If no one gets in, no one can tear it apart."

"That's no way to live, Jethro," she said still cupping his face with her hands.

"I know. Nicole made me realize that."

"She's staying with a family in the city, Jethro, you can visit her."

He didn't reply he only nodded, dropping his chin to his chest. Jen's hands slid down to his shoulders and rested there gently before she leaned in and placed her ear to his chest, the top of her head resting just under his chin. Her hands made their way around him under his arms as his came up around her as well, standing together grieving.

Gibbs didn't know how long they had stood but he felt his legs starting to ache. He pulled his head up and looked around for a moment as he felt Jen shift bringing her head up as well. He looked down at her and saw the exhaustion in her eyes and knew his must look much worse. She reached up with her right hand and ran it along his jaw.

"You look tired, Jethro," she said gently, causing him to smile.

"I am," he said. She took a step back from him taking his hand in hers squeezing it gently. Their gaze remained locked.

"I should go," she said half heartedly knowing that she really didn't want to, and from his expression he didn't want her to go either. He took a deep breath but didn't say anything as he fought with himself over the feelings that had resurfaced with a vengeance since earlier in the evening.

She hadn't moved from the spot, still holding onto his hand. Neither one could muster the words, and neither one could walk away. Jen was conflicted with the emotions that had conjured up during the course of the evening, thoughts and feelings she had vowed to abandon so many times. There was their working relationship now to consider as well, she was his boss, and he was her subordinate.

Everything seemed to be spinning as they both thought about the next move. The exhaustion was making it hard for them both to control what they were feeling and Gibbs saw it in Jen's eyes, and he knew that she must see it in his eyes too, desire. He reached up with his free hand extending his finger, placing it gently under her chin, causing her to close her eyes. Gibbs looked down as he let his finger drop, causing Jen's eyes to open.

"Stay," he said in a low whisper, his voice not quite coming together. She looked at him a moment, studying his eyes, his body language, his face. She decided that it was what she wanted as well and simply nodded to him. A smile crossed his face before the exhaustion forced him to close his eyes. Jen directed him to the couch in the corner, not sure if either had the energy to move up the stairs. Gibbs lay down and scooted so Jen could fit too and they fell asleep in each other's arms on the dusty couch in his sawdust filled basement.

TBC…


	20. A New Home

**Chapter Twenty: A New Home**

Nicole never went back to sleep, she couldn't will herself to close her eyes, knowing he was lurking in the darkness, just waiting for her. She sat in her bed and watched the window. The moon slowly disappeared and the sun started to peak over the horizon. She looked over when Mandy sat up and blinked sleep from her eyes. Mandy looked over at her and gave her a small smile but Nicole could see the pity in it and she looked away.

Mandy didn't say anything and Nicole ignored the other girl as she got dressed and ready for school. Finally the other girl was out of the room and Nicole got up from the bed and looked around. She didn't know what was in store for her this day and she had to admit she was a bit scared being with the new family. Family, her new family, she couldn't quite grasp the concept in her mind; she was going to live with these people now.

She heard someone calling her from downstairs as she looked around her room. She found a dresser on her side of the room and pulled open a drawer. There were some of her clothes in it. Nicole wondered who had gone and gotten them for her, but she quickly dismissed the thought as she pulled out something to wear. Once she was dressed she made her way down the stairs as the other three kids were hurrying out the front door for school.

She sat down at the table and looked around the house. Sadness crept over her as she remembered her mom, wanting desperately to awaken from this dream that had become her life. She felt alone in the house full of people. Dawn put a bowl of cereal down in front of her causing Nicole to look up at her.

"We'll go down to the school today and get you enrolled," Dawn said with a smile.

Great, Nicole thought, another new school to start. She wished she hadn't been moved so far and could continue to go to her old school. She hated starting at a new one and two in one semester was just rotten. She tried to put up a smile but it didn't work and Dawn nodded as she turned away. Nicole spooned some cereal into her mouth and chewed, wishing she was somewhere else.

Her life had turned completely upside down in the last couple weeks, first leaving California only to have her mother murdered and bounced to yet another new home was weighing on her. She wanted to close her eyes count to ten and wake up back in her old home on the old base with her mother smiling at her. She knew it would never happen. This was home now whether she liked it or not. She was stuck in a new city, with a new family, and a new school.

After finishing her cereal she continued to sit at the table before Dawn came in and touched her gently on the shoulder. Nicole looked up at her and waited. Dawn nodded towards the door before speaking.

"Let's get you enrolled in the school and we'll get you in Mandy's class," Dawn said lightly as Nicole simply shrugged her shoulders getting up slowly from the table.

Dawn decided that they would walk since the school was only two blocks from the house, and they headed in that direction. They walked along in silence, Nicole not wanting to talk, and Dawn unsure of how to breech the subject that needed to be discussed. Dawn had looked Nicole over before leaving the house checking on her eye. It was swollen and discolored, showing a nice black with shades of purple mixed in around the side and bottom. The split above was crusted over with a scab.

The walk was short as they came up in front of the building and Dawn led the way to the office. Nicole looked around as they came through the hallway and she stopped behind Dawn when they got into the office itself. A lady behind the desk smiled brightly at Dawn.

"Hello, Dawn, what can I do for you today?" she asked cheerfully, making Nicole close her eyes and shake her head slightly.

"Well, Mrs. Callaghan, I need to get Nicole here enrolled in the sixth grade," Dawn replied putting a hand on Nicole's shoulder forcing her to step up beside her. Mrs. Callaghan smiled at Nicole but didn't get one in return.

"New foster child I see," Mrs. Callaghan said politely making Nicole want to smack her. Of course she was she thought, why else would this woman be enrolling an eleven year old when she already had three children in the school.

The process took close to an hour and Nicole was bored the entire time, wishing she could just escape from these people. Once it was finished Dawn put a hand on Nicole's shoulder and looked at the girl. Mrs. Callaghan smiled brightly again making Nicole sick to her stomach.

"That does it, tomorrow she'll be in Miss Regan's class," Mrs. Callaghan said. Dawn nodded and looked at Nicole.

"That's the same class as Mandy," Dawn said softly. That's just wonderful, Nicole thought, as if they thought her and Mandy had bonded over night and were best of friends now. She feigned a smile but then quickly looked away.

"If you like, Dawn, you can show her around today."

"I think that's a good idea," Dawn said taking hold of Nicole's arm once again and gently leading her from the office. They walked around the school as Dawn pointed out various places Nicole would need to know. Nicole felt like she was falling deeper and deeper away from normalcy and into a black hole.

This was her new beginning she thought, a family of six now, instead of two. She was beginning to think she preferred the two but figured she needed to keep an open mind about having 'siblings' around. She would also have to remind herself that Mandy might be a good friend if she gave her a chance. Everything was spiraling away from her though and she felt lost in a spin that wasn't going to end. She needed something to latch onto but the walls all felt smooth. Then she remembered the numbers on a piece of paper in the house and felt a little better, he was still here, still in the same city.

They were nearing the end of the tour now as Dawn had shown her around the entire school, and Nicole felt like crawling in a hole and hiding. Instead she smiled politely up at Dawn and then the two of them walked back to the house, again the air thick with silence.

After entering the house Nicole flopped herself down on the couch. She missed the plum of sawdust that would have erupted yesterday. Dawn watched her with concern filled eyes as the child studied the fabric of the couch.

"Nicole, do you want to talk about your nightmare?" Dawn asked with such love and concern that Nicole almost started crying when she looked up at the stranger that was now her parent. She shook her head taking a deep breath to control the tears. Dawn bit at her lower lip and sat down next to the child. She reached out and gently stroked her shoulder.

"It's ok to be scared," Dawn said in a whisper. Nicole nodded; she wanted to talk to Gibbs. She wanted to tell him about her nightmare. She wanted him to be here and not this woman, but life was unfair, and when it rains, it pours.

"It was about the faceless man," Nicole said staring at the wall in front of her. Dawn waited to see if she would continue but that was all she said.

"Who is the faceless man?" Dawn asked to prompt her to tell more. Nicole looked up at her horrified that she wanted her to explain who he was. She didn't know that she could.

"He chases me," she said in a whisper as fresh tears escaped. She couldn't continue as the images of her dream flooded her conscious mind scaring her. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around her knees, which were pulled to her chest, rocking back and forth to try to comfort herself, as the man laughed at her from the darkness.

Dawn wrapped an arm around Nicole's shoulders as the child's face disappeared, being pressed to her arms. She felt Nicole shaking as she battled the images in her mind. Nicole jumped at the touch of the other woman and felt like pulling away completely, but in the end she just sat there rocking, shaking, and fearing the man in her mind that chased her.

Nicole fought to produce other images that could block out the faceless man and his knife, with all the red. She first thought of the boat and forced it into her mind, then Gibbs followed suit. She recalled the last two days, flooding her mind with the memories of the time spent chasing the monsters away. She finally looked up at Dawn and saw the woman almost terrified of the child sitting next to her. Nicole felt more alone than she did before. She didn't know if these people truly could handle what was lurking in her mind.

TBC…


	21. Alibi's and Spying Eyes

**Chapter Twenty-One: Alibi's and Spying Eyes**

Ziva sighed as she hung up her phone. It was still early and they had just cleared their only suspect. Tony looked at her with a raised eyebrow, questioning her sigh. She shook her head, and pursed her lips before sitting back in her chair and cocking her head to the side.

"That call just cleared Captain Lariman," she said waving her hand idly in the air. Tony glared at her and McGee snapped his head up.

"What?" Tony asked.

"I just spoke with Colonel Holden at Norfolk and he vouched for Captain Lariman's whereabouts for the entire day when Lt. Commander Conrad was murdered. There are fifteen other marines that are also witness to his whereabouts. I think it's pretty solid, Tony," she said as her shoulders rose and fell. Tony groaned and threw his pen at the computer monitor.

"We've got nothing," he said with gritted teeth. Everyone's head turned when McGee's phone rang and he picked up the receiver.

"Agent McGee," he said sounding slightly defeated.

"This is Lt. j. g. Pearce, Agent McGee," a voice responded to him.

"Oh, yeah, the short hand," he bumbled as he pulled the file from the corner of his desk and opened it up.

"Your message was kind of confusing I'm not sure what you're asking me."

"We found a file with a cryptic short hand in it with Commander Conrad's things. We were wondering if anyone there knew her short hand. I figured since you worked second chair with her that maybe," McGee said.

"Yes I've translated her shorthand before. Commander Blake would be best but he was sent out of town last night as a consult. If you could send me the file I can get you a transcript of what is on it," she replied.

"That would be great. I'll get it scanned in and emailed to you within the hour. If you could get it back to me with the highest priority that would be wonderful."

"Not a problem, send it and I'll work it up and get it back to you right away."

McGee ended the phone call and looked over at his confused teammates. He then went on to explain what Abby had found last night and that he had left a message for Pearce before he left. McGee then scanned the entire short hand file and attached it to an email sending it off to California for translation. Tony made a phone call and had Captain Lariman released and had a ride arranged so he could return to Norfolk. They were sitting in the bullpen pondering the case.

"We're out of suspects," Tony said, the frustration showing in his voice. Ziva turned her chair slightly and thought a moment.

"Let's regroup. Who else in her life would have motive to stalk and kill her?"

"Ok, let's say for argument sake, Lariman wasn't the stalker. Who was?" McGee asked.

"We don't know, Probie, that's the problem," Tony said with a sneer. McGee looked down at his computer.

"Tony, what type of cases was she working on?" Ziva asked.

"We cleared them all. She didn't have anything big because they were transferring her. She barely had her feet wet at the new base. Old cases pending were handed off, she wouldn't even be a part of them," Tony replied.

"Ok," McGee said thinking aloud. "Where else would there be motive? She told Commander Betz that someone was making it impossible for her to raise her daughter the way she wanted to. Brings it back to the stalker, but who was it?"

"We need to find out who this mystery stalker is because it was obviously not the mystery man in her life," Ziva commented.

"We really haven't ruled out Lariman as the stalker though," Tony protested.

"Tony! The man didn't do it, he's got an alibi," Ziva groaned.

"But that doesn't clear him of the stalking!" Tony said raising his voice. "Look, we can't just dismiss the fact his car matches the one the stalker used."

"I bet half the people on that base drive a dark four door sedan," Ziva said with a sigh, earning her a glare from Tony. She stuck her tongue out at him briefly before turning to McGee. "Who else do we know about?"

"The staff with her at JAG but I haven't found any motive for any of them. I mean they all seemed to get along with her," McGee said shaking his head. "We're missing something."

"Yeah the killer," Tony replied tapping his pencil against the desk. McGee shot him a look of annoyance and Ziva snorted a short laugh. Abby walked into the bullpen and looked around at the bickering agents. She cleared her throat.

"What's the matter, Abbs?" Tony asked sitting back in his chair.

"I have the two phone numbers that McGee brought back from California," she said with a smile.

"You found them?" McGee asked sitting forward in his chair.

"Of course," Abby said bouncing a little. "The one is a private cell phone registered to a Renee Atwater. The other one is a home phone number for a Commander Tyrell Powell."

"McGee, find out who Renee Atwater is. Ziva, I want to know everything about Commander Powell," Tony snapped standing from his chair with a smile. "Thanks, Abbs, you gave us direction."

"That's what I'm good at," she said with a smile and turned, walking from the bullpen back to the elevator, her pigtails swaying with each step. McGee and Ziva pounded away at their computers digging up everything they could on the new people Abby had just mentioned.

* * *

He watched her walk with the new adult to the school. He stayed in the shadows of the morning sun, not wanting to be spotted. He didn't know if she had seen him that day or not. It scared him to know that maybe this eleven year old could finish what her mother had started.

He had not seen her when he had killed the mother; he had searched the house and found what he needed. Luckily for him he felt all that was left that could take him down was that child. Easy enough now that they had her away from NCIS, sneaking into the foster home would be much easier than trying to take on the ex-marine NCIS agent she was staying with earlier.

After destroying the evidence Commander Conrad had on him he had fled the house. He had escaped just in time as he saw the MPs coming up the road when he drove off. He tried to calm his mind, things were going to be ok he told himself, he could contain this minor snag in his plans. He concentrated on the front doors of the school. They had disappeared through them almost two hours ago.

He stayed hidden from view, not wanting to draw attention to himself. Finally they came out, the girl walking slightly behind the woman. He couldn't risk taking her now. It was too bright, too much could go wrong. He followed them back to the house; the girl was withdrawn he noticed. They spoke no words as they made their way to the home she was living in now.

He knew he would make his move tonight, after they were all asleep he would sneak in and take the child. He had a place to take her, where he could question her and find out what she knew, and who she had told. He watched as the two disappeared through the front door, shutting out the outside world and his line of sight as they went in. He would wait, he was patient. He was sure they didn't know where to look and with any luck he could end this and no one would be the wiser. It was the last hole in his mission and he aimed to plug it. Tonight would be the night; he would need to clean this matter up once and for all. He would accomplish his mission as soon as the house was asleep.

* * *

It had been a few hours when McGee's email beeped and his phone rang. He clicked on the email icon as he picked up the receiver. An email from Pearce popped up on his screen as he put the phone to his ear.

"Agent McGee," he said as he read the first line of the email.

"Did you get my email?" Pearce's voice filled his ear.

"Yeah, just reading it now. What is all this?"

"I was hoping you would be able to tell. I translated what she wrote, but the notes are shorthand even in the long version, if that makes sense," she replied. McGee continued to read.

"Do you know what any of this means?" McGee asked as he continued to read the translated version.

"It all seems to be surplus numbers, but I don't know why Commander Conrad would be keeping notes on that. It doesn't go with any cases she had here, but maybe one she had started there."

"Could she have been working on something on the side? Maybe for someone else as a legal issue?"

"Possibly, I mean we handle all the legal issues on base, but this seems more like tracking items. Like she was keeping track of someone's record keeping."

"Thanks again, Lt. Pearce," McGee said.

"Glad to help," she said before McGee dropped the receiver back in the cradle. When he looked up he saw Tony staring at him.

"Word from California?" Tony asked.

"Yeah, Pearce translated the file I sent her, but it's all inventory numbers. Surplus items, with two amounts next to them. Pearce says it doesn't go with any cases, but she can't rule out a legal question or issue from someone on base that Commander Conrad would have been researching for personally."

"What about here?" Ziva asked joining the conversation.

"I don't know," McGee said. "But this doesn't look like a legal issue. It really looks like she was tracking the amounts of surplus from somewhere."

"Check into it, McGee. Find out where this surplus is from, start in California, match it with records if you can, find out if it's something important," Tony said nodding his head. Maybe they had another lead after all. It was nearing that time when he would have to call Gibbs and he hoped he had something worth while to tell the man.

TBC…


	22. Forgiving the Dead

**Chapter Twenty-Two: Forgiving the Dead**

Gibbs couldn't sleep as he lay tangled with Jen on the couch in his basement. He watched her as she dreamed but couldn't overcome the insomnia of other night. He gently removed himself and stood in front of the couch for a while staring at her before heading upstairs. He would not work on his boat, not tonight. His mind was flooded with thoughts, memories, nightmares, happiness, fear, pain, and anger.

The burden was almost too much to comprehend as he sorted through his life. He let his mind drift back to the days of a young, brash marine, taking him through basic once again. He remembered his years as a seasoned marine before moving on to NCIS, returning to active duty for the brief period of Desert Storm. It drifted back to his first marriage, the happiest he had been in his life, to his daughter, his joy.

Darkness enveloped the happy times when he proceeded through the death of his daughter, and the suicide of his first wife. He had moved on, or thought he had, when he married for the second time, but unable to trust and open his heart made that impossible from the beginning. His third marriage was a joke from the beginning as he still harbored the anger of his first wife and drove the third one away, unable to open up to someone completely, unable to communicate with his heart.

The memories of building his career, achieving what he had, were bright spots in his otherwise dismal attempt at life. Failure seemed to be his key component when it came to other humans, unable to connect on a personal level, unable to protect from the horrors of the world. He thought of Paris, of his time with Jen as a partner, as more. He thought what he had shared with her now and how it would change things that had held them back in the past.

He thought about Nicole. There defiantly was a hole in his heart again; one he thought had scarred over so many years ago, cut fresh but a single event. He sat on the front porch in the cool night air, staring at the cloudy sky wondering why his life had such pot holes. Nothing seemed to stick around for him, it was why he was a bastard; the less you let in the less that can leave you. It was how he felt, it was how he lived.

Years of pain and heartache had taught him that, starting in the marines, people died, people left, people betrayed. It was a fact of life, no one stayed by your side forever no matter what they told you. For the first time in a long time he let his mind explore his memories and thoughts of Shannon.

He had often wondered if all his failed relationships stemmed from this one. He had failed her in the worst way; he had shut her out when she needed him the most. She was grieving too, lost a child as well. He ignored her, ignored the signs, and she paid with her life. He was so wrapped up in his own self pity, own self grief, that he neglected to acknowledge that someone else was hurting just as much. He had kept his distance partly because he thought she had blamed him for Kelly's death. He blamed himself it only made sense to him that she would blame him too.

He'll never know if she did or not, he had never asked her, and now she was gone. He had lived with that guilt for so long. There were times when he used to be consumed by the guilt, binge drinking a night away to chase the sorrow. He had control over it now, or at least he had. He felt the need tonight to drink, but he resisted. His boss was sleeping down in his basement. What would she think if she found him drunk?

Instead he stared at nothing in the sky and waited in the cold for something inside him to give. Guilt was a powerful thing, but anger was even stronger. He knew he harbored anger towards his first wife, leaving him the way she did. Taking what he thought was the easy way out. He had no intention of checking out, why would she take such a cowards route he thought? But now as he thought back to losing Kelly and the bastard that he had become after the fact, he could see why she would be so depressed to take her own life.

Anger is a hard emotion to let go of and he eventually buried it but now he thinks he never truly let go of it. He needed to forgive her for what she did, and forgive himself for not stopping it. Plain and simple he thought and had to smile, if it were only that simple. Forgiveness was a tricky thing.

The sun was peaking up over the horizon and he sat staring at the giant ball of fire as it crested. He was tired, but not sleepy, for it was an emotional drain he felt. He heard his front door open and glanced over his shoulder to see Jen coming towards him with a look of worry. He gave her a smile but then turned his attention back to the rising sun in front of him. She came up next to him, dropping a hand on his shoulder.

"You sleep at all last night?" she asked softly.

"No," Gibbs said quietly his attention still on the sunrise. "Too much on my mind."

"Want to talk about it?"

"Ducky says I should," he said with a chuckle.

"Ducky is a very smart man," she said drawing him to turn his head to look at her before nodding slowly and averting back to colors of the morning sky.

"Just reviewing my life," he said closing his eyes.

"Lot to review," she said with a light smile.

"Thinking about failures," he continued.

"Failures?"

"The only two things I didn't fail at are being a marine and a special agent."

"Jethro," Jen said with a concerned voice.

"It's true, Jen. I failed as a husband, three times, I failed as a father once, I failed in every human relationship I've ever had," he said shaking his head. "I should have noticed Shannon was slipping. I should have seen it."

"You were grieving the loss of a child."

"So was she," Gibbs said through gritted teeth. "It's no excuse. I should have grieved with her. I should have been there next to her, instead I was selfish. I pitied myself, loathed my self, hated myself. If I blamed me I thought she sure as hell blamed me for the death of our daughter."

"Jethro, you were under distress, you couldn't have possibly," Jen started.

"Couldn't have noticed? You're wrong," he said stepping away from her and turning to lean on the railing. He watched her with cold eyes as hers became more concerned. "I did notice, Jen, that's the thing. I realize it now, I did notice. She came to me first and I pushed her away. I pushed her away. And you know what the worst thing is?"

"What?"

"I was angry with HER. How could I react that way? Why would I be angry with her and not myself?" he said and Jen didn't answer. It was a few moments before he continued. "I was angry because I thought she took the easy way out. I had just lost my daughter and now she took the only other thing worth anything in my life and threw it away too. I was lost, I was in pain, but I wouldn't admit it, no. I was strong, I was a marine."

Jen took a step closer to him as he stopped to take a deep breath. His eyes were closed as she wrapped her arms around his chest and laid her ear over his heart. His arms remained locked on the railing behind him

"I never truly forgave her in my heart, and I never forgave myself," he said softly after a long pause. "It's the cause of all my other failures. Those women that divorced me deserved more but I couldn't give it to them. They should have known that from the beginning. You saw it."

"Yes, I noticed," she said her voice muffled by his shirt. "You couldn't fully give me your heart so I said enough."

Gibbs finally let go of the railing behind him, leaning his back into it for support and brought his arms around her. He placed his head on top of hers as they both stood quietly waiting for something. Neither knew what but they both waited. After another long pause Gibbs picked his head up and looked towards the morning sky. He squinted at the brightness as the sun had come completely over the horizon hovering low in the morning sky.

"I'm so sorry, Kelly. I am so sorry, Shannon, I forgive you. I forgive myself for what I did to you," Gibbs whispered as tears slid down his face. After it was said Gibbs felt a burden lift from his heart. There was less pain and the hole that constantly reminded him of the loss in his life seemed a bit smaller. He thought of the happy moments in his life shared by the two and smiled. They were no longer clouded by the brutality of the ending of their lives.

Finally Gibbs pulled himself from Jen and headed for the door without a word. Jen stood briefly watching him before she followed him in. She trialed him down to the basement and watched as he picked up his tools and started to work on his boat in silence. She sat down on his couch and grabbed the remote clicking on the CNN morning report. Gibbs smiled to himself.

"No CNN this morning," Gibbs said getting a shocked expression from Jen. He grinned wider and grabbed the remote from her clicking it to the cartoon network before going back to his boat. Jen smiled at his choice and settled into watch.

"Don't you have work today?" he asked as he worked on the boat.

"I'm the director I can take the day off if I want," she replied with a smile.

TBC…


	23. Chasing Our Tails

**Chapter Twenty Three: Chasing Our Tails**

McGee sat at his desk frustrated, having the urge to smack his head repeatedly off the monitor for his computer. Ziva was on the phone chattering away with someone and Tony was sitting at his desk deep in though, pencil posed over his lips. McGee looked over at the older agent and frowned.

"Tony?" he asked with a frown on his face. DiNozzo slowly pulled the pencil down and turned to face McGee.

"What, Probie?"

"What are you doing?"

"Thinking about how we're sitting here chasing our tails while a murderer goes about his daily life," Tony says with a sigh. McGee slowly nods. "You get anything yet?"

"What have you been working on?"

"Probie, what do you got?" Tony asked a little irritated.

"Right, Tony. I found some of the surplus numbers she was tracking and one column lines up with the official numbers passed off on base. The other column is higher in most categories but it doesn't say what the category stands for."

"And the phone number?"

"That is really hinky, Tony," McGee says. Tony arched his eyebrows sitting leaning closer to McGee.

"Really?" he says enthusiastically hoping this was something they could use.

"Yeah, but I think it's a dead end."

"Damn it," Tony said hard as he blew out a breath. McGee cringed continuing with his findings.

"Renee Atwater had a cell phone with that number," McGee began.

"Had?" Tony asked.

"Yes, she had it right up until the day she died in a car accident six months ago."

"Probie, Lt. Commander Conrad called the number less than three months ago," Tony said curiously.

"I know, that's what I said, this is hinky. Listen to this, Atwater was killed six months ago and the phone company receives notice from the family to deactivate the number. The bill is settled up and phone is returned. But then Lt. Commander Conrad calls this number three of four times in a two week span three months AFTER it's been turned off."

"That doesn't make sense," Tony said.

"So I called the phone company and they say that someone had cloned the number and was using a programmed phone granting them access to it without the phone companies knowledge. They found out about the rogue signal when they reassigned the number to a Michael Fallick and he reported anomalies on his phone bill in the first month of his service," McGee continued.

"Did they find out who was cloning the number?" Tony asked hopefully.

"No, they never did. The person dumped the phone as soon as the number was cut again. I guess who ever it was knew they were close to being discovered."

"So why would Commander Conrad be calling a cloned number?"

"She may not have known it was cloned," McGee countered. Tony's head bobbed slowly as he digested the information.

"That was an interesting phone call," Ziva broke in as she placed the phone in its cradle. Both men looked up at her and frowned. She looked at them confused. "What?"

"What was the phone call about?" Tony asked.

"Commander Tyrell Powell," she said slowly.

"And?" Tony said waving his hand in the air trying to push for more information.

"He keeps two houses as far as I can tell," Ziva said.

"Two houses?" McGee asked.

"Yes. One on base and one off base, each having their own phone lines etc. This number Abby found is for his off base housing. Now according to his neighbors on the off base housing," Ziva continued.

"You talked to his neighbors?" Tony asked.

"Of course," Ziva said like it was the most natural step. "Anyway, his neighbors say that he's hardly ever there. Comes by once in a while to keep the place tidy and then once every couple months about six guys come together at his house, are there for a couple hours then they vacate."

"And do the neighbors happen to know what goes on?" Tony asked.

"Ha, funny, DiNozzo, no they do not," Ziva replied with a snort.

"What connection does he have with Commander Conrad?" McGee asked. "Has she ever been seen at his off base housing?"

"No, not that the neighbors could recall, always men, always six. They are pretty certain it is the same six men each time. But they did say they remember two of them driving dark four door sedans," Ziva replied pointing her pen at McGee as she finished.

"Powell could be our stalker," Tony said excitedly standing up from his chair as Abby walked in.

"No, Tony he cannot unless he is stalking her from Iraq," Ziva said, popping Tony's bubble as the man crashed back into his seat with a scowl.

"Hey, Abby," he said defeated. Abby grinned and waved at Tony. "What?"

"Did you check up on those numbers?" she asked.

"That's what we're discussing now, Atwater is a dead end," Tony said with a cheeky smile. "And Powell is in Iraq."

"But doing what?" Abby continued.

"What do you mean?" McGee asked.

"I was getting to that, Abby," Ziva said standing from her chair and walking around her desk. Abby nodded. "Powell was sent over there three months ago. He was sent to count items being used by the Navy and Marines deployed in Iraq."

"Inventory," McGee said half to himself as he pulled the printed translation of the file Abby had found. "This is inventory stuff too. You think she stumbled onto a trafficking ring?"

"Possibly," Tony said getting excited again. He stood and walked over to McGee but stopped half way and looked at Abby. "Abbs, how'd you know about Powell?"

"You think I just sit in my lab and listen to music, Tony?" Abby said with a shocked look on her face. Tony smiled and shook his head pointing at her.

"Good point," he conceded and then went over next to McGee to study the document the younger agent was looking at. The two looked it over and finally McGee got an idea.

"What if these higher numbers are the true inventory numbers, but Commander Powell was forging the records to make it look like there was less in the stock piles and then trafficking the extras he had off. Commander Conrad stumbles on the operation and he…can't because he has an iron clad alibi being in Iraq," McGee said.

"But there are five other men, according to Powell's neighbors," Ziva said.

"And two of them could be our stalker if the neighbors remembered correctly," Tony said with a smile. "I think we're getting somewhere, we just need to find out who meets with Commander Powell at his place. Let's talk to his CO and co-workers, find out who he hangs with."

They felt like they were getting somewhere now. There was fresh 'blood' on the trail and they were committed to tracking it down. A little girl depended on them to bring her mother's killer to justice and they would stop short of nothing to make it happen. Tony was so into what they were working up he forgot about his call to Gibbs.

TBC…


	24. Resistance

**Chapter Twenty Four: Resistance **

Nicole sat in her new home quietly staring at the wall. She felt Dawn continue to watch her from the other side of the room as the woman pretended to keep herself busy. Nicole knew she was worried. It was nearing the time for the other kids to come home from school and Nicole wanted to run away. She hadn't found the courage to ask Dawn for the phone and thought that the woman might freak if she just picked up and started dialing.

Besides she could make it twenty four hours before she broke down and called him…right? She felt a burn that she couldn't make go away, a hole that only seemed to grow large with each passing second. The door opened and her three 'siblings' came in laughing and shoving each other. Nicole sighed and turned away from them. Mandy came in and tossed her book bag into the corner of the room and looked around, spotting Nicole on the couch.

Derrick and Ricky were already gone from sight as Mandy sat down next to Nicole. She was quiet at first waiting, and Nicole grew agitated by her staring. She turned her head slowly and rested cool calculated eyes on the other girl. She saw Mandy flinch a little as her gaze cut into the other girl. Nicole felt a small smile cross her lips briefly before disappearing again.

"Mandy, Nicole will be in your class starting tomorrow," Dawn said cheerfully as if that would make Nicole feel so much better. Mandy smiled but Nicole turned away from her once again.

"Cool. I'll show you around tomorrow then," Mandy said with a smile. Nicole shrugged before getting up and walking away. She could feel the frown as it crossed over Dawn's face but ignored the woman as she headed upstairs to her new room. She could hear Mandy behind her following her making the effort to be friends. Nicole knew she only meant well but for some reason she felt like resisting these people. When she reached her room she tossed the door shut behind her, knowing full well Mandy was only two steps back.

The other girl caught the door and slowly came in the room taking up a spot on her own bed. Nicole flopped onto her back and sighed audibly as she picked at the frills of the comforter that was spread over the top of her bed. Mandy worked up the courage to speak one more time.

"You don't like it here do you?" she asked as if she had failed. Nicole pushed herself up on her elbows and looked over at Mandy thinking about her statement.

"It's not that I don't like you or this house, it's just that I'm not used to living with a…large family," she said half heartedly hoping it would satisfy the other girl in the room. Mandy studied her a moment contemplating what she had said. She didn't buy it.

"I think it's more," Mandy said cocking her head to the side. Nicole dropped down onto her back again and shook her head closing her eyes.

"Maybe," she said.

"They said you saw what happened to your mom," Mandy said in a whisper. "Is that what you have nightmares about?"

Nicole sat up again and crossed her legs in front of her. She didn't want to talk about this with this strange girl. She didn't want to think about it; just the mentioning of it had flooded her mind with images that scared her. She closed her eyes and held her breath to clear her thoughts before opening them up and looking at Mandy. It was then that she decided to scare the girl.

"Yeah, I saw it," she said in a cold hard voice, her eyes growing dark with anger. "I watched as a man stabbed my mom. He yelled at her then he stabbed her and there was blood everywhere. I ran. And yeah it gives me nightmares. I dream of a man without a face. Imagine he's chasing you in a darkness you've never experienced, a cold you can't imagine, through splashes of red, your own mother's blood. He's coming for you with that same knife, chasing you. You can't run because you can't see. You have no clue where he is, what his plans are, or where he'll get you. So you run, because you're so scared but you feel guilty, because you couldn't stop him."

Nicole watched as Mandy's eyes grew larger and larger, relishing in the fact that the girl was scared. It was then that she realized what she was doing and regretted it. She didn't want to take it out on this girl, she didn't mean to harm her, but it had felt good to scare someone else for a change. She looked down at the bedspread for a moment before eyeing the girl across the room one more time.

"I'm sorry," Nicole said softly, shaking her head. "I didn't mean…"

"No sweat," Mandy said with a weak smile and slid off her bed. She left the room and Nicole groaned aloud. She was not going to adjust well to having other kids around. She hated sharing a room already. She then heard the boys thunder past her door squealing at each other and pulled the pillow down over her head. She yelled into her pillow muffling most of it but she knew some of it escaped. She jumped slightly when she felt the bed give way to weight. She peeked up from under the pillow and saw Dawn sitting next to her.

"Everything ok?" Dawn asked. Nicole groaned internally thinking what a stupid question lady. But she was so sincere about it Nicole knew she couldn't be smart with her. She pulled the pillow back in place and shook her head. "Want to talk about it? You scared Mandy pretty good."

"I didn't mean too," she replied through the pillow. Dawn had to strain to hear her.

"I know you didn't. We just want to help, we understand you're used to smaller," Dawn said compassionately. Nicole pulled the pillow off her head and stared up at her new guardian with tear filled eyes. She slowly nodded her acknowledgement knowing that it was probably hard for them to take her in.

"I didn't want to leave," she said as the tears fell. Dawn didn't understand what she meant and Nicole could tell by the look on her face. "Agent Gibbs."

"I know this whole ordeal has been hard on you. Losing your mother, and then having to come live with a family of five isn't easy."

Nicole wanted to say 'no crap lady' but she bit her tongue. After all she was just trying to help. Instead she nodded and rolled onto her side away from the woman trying to console her. Nicole was done talking, she wanted to be alone now, but didn't know if these people would understand that.

Dawn finally gave up and left the room, the silence calming for Nicole. She stayed there until she was called down for dinner. She sat quietly at the table the entire meal, not joining in the conversation, unless something was said specifically to her. She could feel, and knew the others did too, the drain she put on the atmosphere.

After dinner Nicole once again retreated to her room. Mandy joined her a couple hours later and told her they were supposed to go to sleep since they had school in the morning. Nicole nodded but knew she most likely wouldn't sleep tonight. The man was waiting for her and she couldn't bring herself to join him. Mandy turned the lights off and was soon fast asleep on the other side of the room. Nicole lay awake staring at the shadows on the ceilings dancing and swaying with the outside world wondering what she did to deserve a life like this, who she wronged to be punished so harshly.

* * *

He sat in the shadows and waited. He hated having to wait outside, not used to it since his days as a Seal. He had to bid his time though; one wrong move now could destroy everything he worked so hard for. He watched the family through the windows, tracking their movements through the house, committing to memory what he could see.

He wished he could see a floor plan, or pictures of the inside to know precisely where everything stood, and what door led to where, but he knew that was out of the question. So was calling in men to help him, this was going to be a one man job. The hours seemed to creep by for him after the other children came home from school.

He remembered he used to be able to sit perfectly still for hours, even days if necessary in his youth, but the older he got the stiffer his muscles and joints got. Time would be against him as he waited but he was certain he would be able to move stealthily through the house and extract the girl with little to no problem or noise.

It was a matter of timing, precision, and skill. His body may have been softening as he aged but his mind and skill was still the same. He still possessed the speed and cunning to make this mission a success. Besides, too much rode on him capturing this girl and knowing what she saw and heard that night. He was mad at himself for missing her in the first place. He had planned on taking her next but their argument in the living room must have drawn the girl's attention. He cleared his mind, this was not a time to dwell on mistakes, now was a time to plan a mission.

They had operated in silence for so long before that lawyer had accidentally stumbled onto their little side business. He had disciplined the ensign for getting into trouble his own way after it had drawn unwanted attention to his paperwork. He thought they had cleared the problem up but Commander Conrad had continued to snoop without his knowledge, after the case was closed.

His team had slipped and she had found the evidence to shut them down, so he shut her down. It had not gone as planned and now he sits watching a house in Washington DC stalking an eleven year that could potentially bring him down. They sat down to dinner and he settled in for the final hours of his wait. His mind floated to make the time go faster, but his senses were still trained on his surroundings, making sure he was not detected. The last thing he needed now was to be seen and have to wait until things settled down before he could make his move.

His mind reviewed his objectives for the night, and planned a variety of missions in his head. If there was one thing he learned being a Seal it was to have multiple plans, and be ready to improvise, because nothing went the way it was supposed to. The hours slipped by slowly drawing nearer to the time of attack. He felt his adrenaline starting to pump as his heart rate increased and he felt his muscles flex in anticipation.

He felt jazzed as his blood flow increased and he breathed in deeply. The lights in the house were going out one by one. Two rooms in the top floor had gone out earlier in the evening and he knew those were the rooms where the children would be sleeping. Now he saw as the bottom floor lights were turned off and soon the upstairs floor went dark. He checked his watch and noticed it was just after eleven. He would wait one more hour and make his way into the house after midnight, once he was sure they were sound asleep.

It was all coming together now, just one more step before everything would be back to normal. All he had to do was complete this one last mission and leave no trace, tie up the last loose end and make this nightmare come to an end. One little girl and he would be free of Lt. Commander Conrad and her snooping nose once and for all.

* * *

Nicole glanced at the clock and sighed. It was eleven o'clock and she was still scared to fall asleep. She had a feeling she was going to sleep through school tomorrow but she didn't care. Every time she closed her eyes she saw him standing in the darkness smiling. He had no face but she was sure he was smiling, she could _feel_ it. She rolled over in her bed once again, tangling herself even more into the bedspread.

She looked over at Mandy and envied the girl that was sleeping so soundly in the next bed. It didn't seem fair to Nicole, and she had the urge to wake the other girl up simply because she was stuck awake. She decided against it, and instead tugged the covers from her body and tossed them to the side as she slid her feet to the floor. She walked slowly from the bed, so not to wake the other child, to the dresser, picking up the scrape of paper Gibbs had given her, and left the room quietly. She walked through the hall and down the stairs and grabbed the cordless phone from its base.

She thought about sitting on the couch but decided it was too open and she would be noticed immediately if one of the adults came out of their room. So she made her way quietly to the den in the back of the house and sat in the chair at the desk. She laid the paper in front of her and stared at the numbers debating whether she should call him this late or not, as she glanced at the clock it was just past midnight. Finally she broke down and dialed his cell number and waited as it rang.

TBC…


	25. Connecting the Dots

**Chapter Twenty Five: Connecting the Dots**

Tony, Ziva, and McGee spent the majority of the afternoon on the phones talking to everyone that was connected to Commander Tyrell Powell. They called his commanding officer in Iraq, they called the people who he worked with on the base in San Diego, and they called people who they were told were his friends, but not once did they talk to Commander Powell himself.

He was not reachable by phone, or so they were told. Once they were all done gathering information and the phones were silent again they sat looking tired, staring at each other. No one went first so Tony took the initiative to lead the way.

"What'd we get?" he asked looking at McGee first.

"I spoke to Captain William Thomas in Iraq, that's Commander Powell's CO over there. He said that Powell runs the surplus, tracking what is used, what needs to be ordered, how much stock is left, that sort of thing. He said Powell keeps his head down and doesn't mingle much with the other men. Captain Thomas thought that Powell was a top notch officer and had nothing but praise for him," McGee said.

"I spoke with Ensign Karen Domicello who works for Admiral Kirkpatrick. He is out of town. She said that Commander Powell was under the command of the Admiral while on base and she remembered him as a polite gentleman. She said they held regular meetings with each other in the Admiral's office but she didn't know what they were about," Ziva said when McGee had finished.

"I spoke with a Lt. Michael Malford at San Diego who worked under Powell when he was in California. He said that Powell did most of the paperwork and he just reported the numbers along with a couple other guys. Malford told me that no one else saw the paperwork that went out from Powell's desk," Tony added.

"Sounds like he was scamming somewhere, but how do you offload the extras that you neglected to report?" McGee asked.

"He'd need help. I was given the name of Captain Jericho Rogers of the Marines, by an officer that knew Powell at the base," Tony began again. "I was told these two ran together a lot. Maybe he's a link to the other men, but I couldn't reach him."

"Is he deployed?" Ziva asked.

"Not according to the records," Tony replied.

"If Powell and Rogers are always together then I bet it's a strong possibility that he is one of the five other men that come together at his house," McGee interjected.

"Find out what kind of car he drives," Tony said to Ziva before turning to McGee. "Do we know what kind of car Powell drives?"

"It's a light blue Ford Escort, four doors, but it's small, not a sedan," McGee rattled off. Tony frowned. It ruled out Powell as the stalker.

"Got it," Ziva said as she read from her computer screen. "Captain Jericho Rogers has a black four door Saturn Ion sedan."

"Dark four door sedan," Tony said smiling. "We need to find this guy and talk to him."

Abby walked into the bullpen at that time carrying another file with her. Tony looked up at her when she came around her desk. She had a slight smile on her lips as she read the contents as she walked.

"What'cha got there, Abby?" Tony asked sitting back in his chair putting his hands behind his head. She stopped reading to look up at him and then placed the file down in front of her.

"I was going through the rest of the files in the box that I found the short hand one in," Abby started. "And I found this one, which it would have been directly on top of the other one."

"Ok," Tony said sitting forward and looking at the file. "It's a case file, Abbs, for an Ensign Patrick Deeves."

"Right you are, Tony. But what really interests me are the side notes on the case. Seems like a lot of people were curious about this case and her looking into what really happened. Look at the notes," Abby continued, pointing to the file. Tony read the side notes.

"Whoa, hey, Probie, listen to this. Seems that Captain Rogers AND Commander Powell were both interested in how this Ensign Deeves case was progressing. They both contacted Commander Conrad and she wrote that she was suspicious of them on her notes," Tony said the excitement evident in his voice.

"So who is Ensign Deeves? We haven't come across that name yet," McGee said standing from his own desk and walking over to Tony's. Abby shrugged and turned to leave, her job here done. Ziva tapped a pen on the desk thinking about all the information they had just received. She started to type on her computer looking up Ensign Deeves.

"I don't know, Probie, but we better find out," Tony said as he continued to read the notes. "Looks like Admiral Kirkpatrick also had tabs on this one, has notes here to call him about the case."

"Got it," Ziva called from behind her computer screen and the two men looked at her expectantly. She skimmed the screen before looking around her monitor to talk to them.

"Ensign Patrick Alexander Deeves is assigned to San Diego. Oh this is interesting; ultimately he works under Admiral Kirkpatrick. He works in a store room, not the same place as Powell. This is smaller munitions, mostly ammunition not hardware," Ziva said. "His main CO is Lt. Adam Constra."

"Says here he was reprimanded by the Navy when he was caught by Constra for turning in faulty paperwork. Ensign Deeves claimed it was just an error in his reporting and that it was nothing more. There was a full investigation into his actions and he was cleared do to lack of evidence but seems from the notes here that Commander Conrad wasn't convinced," Tony said reading from the file that Abby had brought to him.

"So if she wasn't convinced maybe she continued to dig on the side and that's where we got the coded file from," McGee said. Tony looked up at him thoughtfully and slowly nodded his agreement.

"Sounds plausible to me, we need more proof. Who all do we have name wise now?" Tony continued.

"We have Commander Tyrell Powell," McGee said.

"Ensign Patrick Deeves, who seems to have set this all in motion," Ziva said.

"Captain Jericho Rogers, the marine that runs with Powell," Tony added. "That's three names; we're three short of six."

"We should let Gibbs know what's going on," McGee said quickly. "This is moving fast now and it seems we have likely suspects."

"Right, Probie," Tony said glancing at his watch and cringing. He should have called the boss a couple hours ago. "Let's work it through some more so it's concrete when we present it to the boss."

"Ok, we got three people seemingly connected on the San Diego Naval base, two Navy personnel and one marine. Two work in surplus and stockpiling in direct connection to weapons and ammunition," McGee said starting the ball rolling.

"I found something more," Ziva said as the other two looked at her. "I know how Rogers and Powell know each other. Powell sends the needs of the troops stationed overseas back to Rogers who handles the shipping of the new munitions."

"So he is in control of what goes out, and could easily move stuff," Tony said.

"He could be the link to shipping stolen surplus off the base," McGee added. Tony nodded at him.

"Good thinking, Probie," Tony said.

"So we got two guys changing numbers to make everything add up and we got one guy shipping out surplus," Ziva added.

"Ok, so now we just need to find out who and what the other three people involved do," McGee replied.

"They'll need someone higher up to cover them, and my guess is someone else in the numbers business to hide what they are doing. And one more most likely for contacts to sell," Tony said.

"All connected to San Diego or close enough to meet every couple months at Commander Powell's off base housing," Ziva interjected.

"Looks like we got a start," Tony said. "Keep moving, I'll call the boss man and see what he thinks. Maybe he'll join us tomorrow."

TBC…


	26. Scrambling

**Chapter Twenty Six: Scrambling**

Jen had watched Gibbs work on his boat most of the morning. She had pretended to watch the television but her attention was most definitely captured by the man sanding away. She suspected he knew she was watching him, but he said nothing, just harbored the slightest of smiles on his lips.

The morning moved along and she saw a difference in him. He was more relaxed, seeming to enjoy the moment. Neither one spoke, they didn't need words to fill the air; the backdrop of the television was enough to be comforting. The day continued.

It was early afternoon when Jen went upstairs to shower, being in the constant sawdust in had made her feel gritty. She left Gibbs in the basement and was gone no more than half an hour. When she returned she couldn't help but smile, as Gibbs had finally tired out after his sleepless night. She found the man on his back under this boat, sound asleep. She watched him for a while, savoring this moment as she processed the feelings that had surfaced in her mind.

She left him in the basement to sleep then, heading upstairs, she made herself a light lunch and sat in the kitchen eating it. The afternoon was passing when she heard a phone ring on the kitchen counter. She grabbed it and looked at the ID screen; it was a call from DiNozzo. She flipped his phone open placing it to her ear.

"You're late with your update," she said in a flat voice. Tony heard the director's voice in his ear and nearly dropped the phone.

"I…I thought I called Agent Gibbs," Tony stammered after regaining his composure.

"You did, he's asleep," Jen replied. Tony grinned on the other end and Jen could feel it. Tony had thoughts running through his mind now and he had trouble concentrating on why he had called Gibbs phone. "DiNozzo?"

"Uh, yeah?" Tony said being drawn from his thoughts.

"You do have something to report right?"

"I, uh, really think I should speak to Gibbs first," Tony said hesitantly. This was new information that the boss hadn't received yet. Tony was weary of giving it straight to the director first.

"This saves us the step of him having to tell me then," she replied with a sigh.

"But I will have to deal with the consequences of you telling him information on his case," Tony countered.

"In his current state I don't think he'll mind, DiNozzo," she replied.

"Reeeeaallly," Tony said his grin growing, his interest peaked.

"I'd stop right now, Special Agent DiNozzo, if you want to have a job to come to tomorrow."

"Yes, Mad…ma'am," Tony stumbled. Jen smiled.

"Report or no report? I could tell Gibbs you got nothing all day," she said with a smile.

"Fine, but when he beats me over the head I'm asking for workman's comp."

"Report, DiNozzo," she continued.

"We got some new breaks in the case," Tony started. He went on to explain everything they had figured out in the last two days and how they had tied together three of the men so far. She countered asking if he had questioned any of the men involved yet. He had to tell her no but they were working on getting back out to California.

"Send McGee, the whole team doesn't have to go," she said.

"I'd be the better," Tony protested.

"McGee goes," she said with finality. Tony slumped in his chair defeated.

"Fine," he said dejectedly. "We'll have the MPs on base pull Rogers and Deeves into holding until McGee can get there to question them."

"Good. What about Powell?"

"He's in Iraq, we're working on getting him detained and having an agent over there conduct the interrogation."

"I'll let Gibbs know," she said nodding slightly and closed the phone. She set it down on the counter again and started to clean up her lunch. She made her way to the steps and was heading down when she saw Gibbs rounding them at the bottom rubbing his neck. He looked up and saw her and stopped.

"Thought you left," he said sluggishly. His mouth was dry, he needed coffee. Jen backed up and stood aside as he came up the stairs and headed to the kitchen. He pocketed his cell phone and frowned when he checked the clock.

"Tony called," she said as he started the coffee machine. He turned around and leaned against the counter staring at her.

"When?"

"Just now," she replied.

"You should have got me," he said as he closed his eyes and stretched the kink in his neck.

"You should try sleeping in a bed," Jen said with concern. Gibbs allowed a small smile to show on his face.

"What'd he have to say?"

"Who?"

"Tony," Gibbs said shaking his head.

"Oh, they made some progress on the case. They have a Commander Powell in Iraq they are interrogating, and McGee is going back to San Diego to interview two men at the base they suspect are also involved in a weapons trafficking ring," she explained.

"Weapons trafficking?"

"Your team believes that Lt. Commander Conrad stumbled onto a weapons trafficking ring operating out of the San Diego base when she investigated a case against an Ensign Patrick Deeves. The official report was there was insufficient evidence to convict the ensign of any wrong doing, but apparently Commander Conrad continued to dig."

"Where did this angle come from?" Gibbs asked.

"Abby found a file in short hand and they had Commander Conrad's second chair assist them in translating it. It was a list of surplus with columns of reported numbers and what they think is true numbers. These people are forging paperwork and siphoning off munitions here and there and they assume selling it on the black market."

"How sound is the lead?"

"Tony seems to think it's solid. Powell is over seas right now in Iraq working weapons stocking and ordering. He sends the needs back to Captain Rogers who ships weapons and ammunition out. Those two are part of it and they think Ensign Deeves is too."

"I should be at work," Gibbs said with a sigh, feeling the burden of this case once again. "I need to be working this one."

"Take some time, Jethro, you've already been through a lot on this one," Jen said softly.

"No, it's time to work on this first hand. I'm going to the office," he said as the coffee machine sounded it was done. He poured himself a cup and offered one to Jen who turned it down. He finished his cup and headed for the bathroom where he took a quick shower. It wasn't long before he was ready to leave.

"Don't push yourself too hard," Jen said as they were walking out. He looked at her.

"I'm fine, Jen," he said.

"I'll meet you there, I need to run home and change first," she said as she got into her car. Gibbs watched as she drove away before getting in his own car and heading to the office. When the elevator dinged and he walked off he found Tony shooting rubber bands at McGee while he and Ziva worked on their computers. He came up behind Tony quietly and smacked him on the head making the younger man yelp.

"Jeez, Bossman, didn't expect you today," Tony said with surprise. Ziva bit back a snicker while McGee hid his grin.

"I've had enough down time, run it by me," Gibbs said as he walked to the plasma screen and studied what they already had up there. The three agents took turns filling Gibbs in on everything they had learned on the case and how each step brought them closer to Powell, Rogers, and Deeves. Gibbs was quiet when they were finished. They all stared at him expectantly as Tony noticed the director walk in and head to her office. He had a small smile on his face as his attention came back to Gibbs. He was greeted with another swift smack to the back of the head.

"Ow," he mumbled as he rubbed the spot.

"Something's missing," Gibbs said as he looked at the screen.

"We think there are three additional men we need to identify and one is most likely a high ranking officer," McGee added. Gibbs looked at the young agent and nodded his approval.

"They'd have to have someone high up to cover the large equipment moving," Gibbs said as he went to his desk. "When do you leave for San Diego, McGee?"

"In three hours, Boss, I was just about to head to the airport."

"Go," Gibbs said waving a hand as McGee nodded and scrambled for his bag before leaving for the elevator. Tony sat down at his own desk, with grin still plastered in place. "Something wrong, DiNozzo?"

"Uh, no, Boss, nothing wrong," DiNozzo said quickly as Gibbs looked at him.

"Thought I smacked that grin off," Gibbs said his voice low. Tony's grin faltered and he nodded ducking his head behind his computer monitor. Ziva stood up and walked up to Gibbs desk.

"You really think McGee was the right choice to send to San Diego?" Ziva asked as Gibbs punched some keys on his keyboard. He was silent a while before looking up at her and smiling.

"Yes, because you are going to Norfolk to pick up Captain Rogers," Gibbs said. Ziva stood a moment confused before her mouth worked again.

"Captain Rogers is in San Diego," she said slowly.

"Nope he's in Norfolk. You couldn't reach him could you, when you were trying," Gibbs said.

"No one seemed to know where he was," Tony said as he peeked out from the safety of his monitor.

"That's because he was a special addition to the team of Marines sent to Norfolk to train for a stint in Iraq."

"But he works shipping," Tony said confused.

"Captain Rogers is a Marine, Tony, it doesn't matter what you're doing now, when they say jump you jump," Gibbs said a little annoyed. Tony shrugged and sat back in his chair. Ziva was still standing in front of Gibbs. "Why are you still here?"

"Uh, I, uh…I'm leaving," Ziva said finally and hurried to her desk to collect what she needed.

"Tony, go with her," he barked, and Tony jumped up and scurried to the elevator with Ziva.

"Good to have you back, Boss," Tony tossed over his shoulder as they pushed into the elevator and the doors closed. Gibbs smiled to himself as he went to work looking up information on the names they had given him. It was going to be another long night, but he was ready. Once Ziva and Tony got back from Norfolk he would talk with Captain Rogers, hopefully McGee would talk to Ensign Deeves tonight yet and they could have the three other names by morning.

As he sat in the quiet he read up on the men that his team had tracked. He tried to find the link to the top of the ring but he failed to see a connection. He had come up with four names that could be but none of them seemed to fit into the scenario. He was getting frustrated and was continually watching the clock waiting for his team to return. He had downed more coffee than he could remember and was feeling the fatigue of the last few days catch up with him. Jen came down the stairs on her way out and saw him sitting at his desk staring at the monitor.

"Go home, Jethro," she said drawing him from his stupor. He nodded but didn't move.

"Not yet, Tony and Ziva will be back soon with Captain Rogers," Gibbs replied.

"You're going to interrogate him yourself?"

"Yes," Gibbs said as if there was no other answer to her question. She nodded and turned to move away.

"Don't forget to get some rest tonight," she said as she disappeared from his sight. He knew she meant well, but he also knew he would get no sleep tonight. The case was too hot right now and he knew he would pursue it through morning if need be.

TBC…


	27. Bringing in Their Man

**Chapter Twenty Seven: Bringing in Their Man**

Tony sat quietly behind the wheel as he navigated through traffic on their way to Norfolk. His mind was still playing scenarios in his head as to what might have happened between Gibbs and Director Shepard. Ziva was staring at the window when she happened to glance to Tony and notice the grin.

"What is with you today? Your lips seem to be glued to your teeth," she said with a sigh.

"You know when I called Gibbs earlier to give him the report?" Tony replied.

"Yeah," Ziva said nonchalant.

"Gibbs didn't answer the phone," Tony said.

"So you had a conversation with his voice mail?" Ziva asked.

"No," Tony said with a snort giving Ziva a look. "Director Shepard answered his phone."

"His cell phone? Director Shepard answered it?" Ziva asked confused.

"Yeeaah, she was at his house," Tony said with a grin. "And she said he was sleeping at the moment and I couldn't talk to him and in his current mood he wouldn't mind that I told her the info first."

"Did she sound playful or," Ziva asked arching an eyebrow. Tony looked at her and smiled.

"Oh there was definitely something there," Tony said nodding his head. Ziva smiled.

"Like?"

"Do you know the history? You're close to the director," Tony asked.

"No. She doesn't discuss it," Ziva said, sounding a bit disappointed.

"You've asked her?" Tony asked with surprise.

"Not directly," Ziva said with a shrug. "How long before we reach Norfolk?"

"Not to much longer," Tony replied absently. "What do you think they were doing? I mean it was afternoon when I called him, late afternoon and he was sleeping, that sound like the boss to you?"

"Maybe he didn't get much sleep in the last few nights and," Ziva started going back to staring out the window.

"Yeah, with the director staying at his house," Tony said thoughtfully. "You think they're…together?"

"Why are you so interested?" Ziva asked with a sigh.

"Think about it, Boss and the director, man," Tony said shaking his head.

"Is this all you think about?"

"What?" Tony asked defensively.

"Sorry I asked," Ziva said leaning her head against the window yawning.

They road the rest of the way to the base in silence, once there they found Rogers' CO and were led to the barracks where Rogers was housed. When they entered they saw Lariman sit up in his bunk and stare at them, Tony saw the recognition. The man thought they had returned for him. They walked past him and came to an empty cot. They heard the CO grumbling under his breath as he headed back to the other side of the room.

Suddenly the lights flicked on and all the men were sitting up in there bunks looking around a little surprised. The CO came to the center of the room making a point to make eye contact with every man in the room before speaking.

"Where is Captain Jericho Rogers?" he bellowed loudly. All eyes in the room shifted to the empty bunk and Tony could see the anger welling on some of the faces. They would be punished for this.

"He was here for lights out, General," Lariman said from his bunk.

"And after?" the General growled.

"Don't know, General, we were all out. Long day," another man said.

"Apparently not long enough for Rogers," the General answered and the men nodded.

"Apparently, sir," Lariman said standing next to his bunk pulling a white t-shirt down his chest. "Does this have to do with Johanna's death?" he asked, his eyes shifting to Tony. Tony stepped forward and nodded.

"He's a suspect yes," Tony said softly.

"Damn it, he came in with me from San Diego. I never thought," Lariman said his anger welling deep inside him. He looked up at Tony. "I'll help you find him."

Tony nodded and walked to the door with Ziva behind him. The General instructed the rest of the men to stay in their bunks and then joined Lariman as they left the room. Tony stopped in the hallway and Ziva came up next to him. He looked at her with tired eyes and wanted to scream.

"What now?" Ziva asked.

"Find him or Gibbs'll have our asses," Tony said with a sigh. Ziva nodded. Lariman and General Markus Dilliford walked up to them.

"Sorry about this Special Agent DiNozzo," Dilliford said with a grunt.

"Things happen, General, let's just find him so we don't have to deal with my boss," Tony replied with a slight smile. The General simply nodded and turned to Lariman.

"You've been spending the most time with him, Jake, where do you think he's gone?" Dilliford asked the other marine.

"Well, Sir, he keeps to himself. Mostly doesn't talk with the other men, avoids them almost. I should have noticed sooner that something was…off," Lariman said shaking his head. "My guess though, Sir, is he makes a lot of phone calls, maybe he's reaching out to someone."

"Maybe he doesn't want to leave his comfy spot in San Diego and hit the sand with the rest of his Marine brothers," General Dilliford said with another grunt. "Take DiNozzo and check the phone banks. I'll take David and sweep the common hall."

"Yes, Sir," Lariman said. Tony nodded and headed off with Lariman towards the phones while Ziva followed the General the other way. They were around a bend when Lariman first spoke to Tony.

"This has really hit me hard," he said softly.

"Commander Conrad?" Tony asked.

"Yeah. I mean it's a shock…I really thought we would work things out," he said taking a deep breath to steady himself.

"Death is never easy," Tony said reassuringly. Lariman nodded.

"How's this man connected?"

"We think he's in a weapons trafficking ring," Tony said.

"How would Johanna gotten mixed up in this?"

"She investigated an ensign also involved and even though the official report said not enough evidence she continued to snoop," Tony continued.

"Deeves," Lariman said stopping in his tracks. "That's where I've seen Rogers before, with the Admiral."

"What?" Tony asked suddenly very interested in what the marine next to him had to say.

"I had this feeling this week that I'd seen Captain Rogers somewhere but you know a name like Jericho you remember right? So I thought maybe he just resembled someone I knew. But yeah, he was with the Admiral that day when I stopped by to pick Johanna up."

"What Admiral?"

"Oh sorry, Admiral Kirkpatrick," Lariman said deep in thought. The name rang a bell in Tony's head but he couldn't place it at the moment.

"What was so special about this?" Tony asked seeming to read the other man's emphasis on this particular moment.

"Well I was standing off a bit waiting for Johanna; I never interrupted her if she was working. This Admiral and Rogers were talking to her," Lariman continued as they started moving again. "But then it got a little heated, like an argument. Johanna just backed away and I was about to go help her when the Admiral just turned and briskly walked away, Rogers on his heals like a lost dog."

"Did you ask Commander Conrad what it was about?" Tony asked as they rounded another corner and came up on a pair of doors.

"Yeah, but she said it was nothing and that he just wanted to know what she had on the ensign, on his case," Lariman said stopping outside the door.

"Did you believe her?"

"No, but I didn't push," he said, a hint of guilt in his voice. Tony just nodded as Lariman pushed the doors open revealing a line of telephones. On the last phone they saw Captain Rogers with his back to them, phone to his ear. He was mumbling something but neither could understand him. Tony put a finger to his mouth and then moved around Lariman.

Rogers hung the phone up and turned around. He nearly jumped when he saw Lariman and DiNozzo standing behind him waiting. He made a quick strike nailing Tony over the eye knocking him to his butt. Rogers then bolted to his left but Lariman cut him off and slammed his body into the other running man.

The two crashed to the floor in a heap, arms and legs flailing in all directions. Tony sat up dazed from the blow and saw Lariman struggling to stay on top of Rogers, the two men twisted together as if one. He got to his feet and swiftly made his way to the bodies tussling on the floor and grabbed Rogers by the arm and twisted making the man yelp in pain.

It gave Lariman just enough maneuvering room to flip Rogers to his back as Tony twisted with him and they managed to pin the man between them. Tony snapped a pair of cuffs on him and the Lariman kneeled on his back holding him in place. Tony took a step back and put a hand to just above his left eye and felt it was sticky.

"Got you a bit there," Lariman said pointing to the spot with a smile. Tony just nodded and used his shirt to staunch the bleeding. It was then that Ziva and General Dilliford came through the doors. Ziva's face split into a smile as she looked from Tony, to Lariman, to Rogers on the floor.

She walked up to Tony and looked at the gash on his face and her smile widened. She didn't say anything and Tony smirked at her before turning to the General. He looked down at Rogers and then at Lariman before eyeing the General.

"General Dilliford, we appreciated all you've done for us today," Tony said with a smile. "And thank you, Captain Lariman, for all your help."

"Just finish this and get the rest of them," Lariman said as he stood pulling Rogers up with him. The four managed to get Rogers into the backseat of the car and soon Tony and Ziva were on their way back to headquarters to a waiting Gibbs as the night sauntered on.

TBC…


	28. Over the Edge

**Chapter Twenty-Eight: Over the Edge**

Tony and Ziva were quiet on the drive back as Rogers sat uncomfortably still cuffed mumbling. Ziva had actually drifted into a light sleep as Tony wrangled the car back to headquarters, back to a waiting Gibbs. The drive was long and boring for Tony and he struggled to keep himself focused on the task at hand.

Most of the ride he wanted to reach back and slap the grumbling Marine in the back seat. Tony wanted to turn and snap at him and tell him to buck up, but he restrained himself and let the bastard moan and complain about the cuffs. Tony glanced at Ziva and noticed a small smile on her lips but didn't wake her to ask her why.

Finally they arrived and the two of them dragged the uncooperative Captain Rogers to an open interrogation room, tossing him roughly down into a chair before turning and exiting the room. They then moved swiftly to the bullpen where they found Gibbs sitting behind his computer studying the dossier on Rogers.

"Get him?" Gibbs asked looking up. He spotted the open sore over the younger man's eye and grinned. "Tony, are you trying to be like me?"

"What? No, Boss, I…" he stammered. Gibbs pointed to his own eye and Tony nodded nervously, calming slightly. "Rogers is in interrogation."

"Good," Gibbs said standing abruptly and walking swiftly towards the elevator. They rode in silence and came into the observation room before anyone spoke. Gibbs eyed the man through the glass watching for tells, signs of stress. The man looked nervous to Gibbs and he figured the Marine knew why he'd been brought in. The fact that he resisted Tony had been proof enough for Gibbs that this man was involved in some capacity.

Gibbs glanced at his watch, noticing it was after eleven now. He composed himself on the inside to match his outside demeanor then left the room appearing a moment later on the other side of the glass. He took a seat across from Rogers and stared at the man. The Marine became more nervous and started to wring his hands.

"You know why you're here?" Gibbs asked in a low voice.

Rogers maintained eye contact with Gibbs, as he wetted his dry lips and placed his hands flat on the table to steady himself. "I'm sure you'll tell me," he said dryly.

"I'm sure I don't need to, but come on, Rogers, who's the lead on this? I mean you're not smart enough to run a big time deal like this, you're just the moving man," Gibbs continued in the low voice leaning forward closing some of the distance between them.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Rogers said, but his eyes and voice gave him away and Gibbs broke into a grin, leaning a little further onto the table.

"Your buddy, Commander Powell, he's not the top either is he? And I know for damn sure Ensign Deeves is the low man, so who is it?"

"Sir, I think…" Rogers started before Gibbs snapped at him.

"Don't you call me sir, I work for a living."

Rogers snapped back in his chair, his hands clamping down on the table as he felt the venom flow from Gibbs' words. He licked his lips again, and Gibbs noted the sweat popping up on the other man's forehead and arms.

"What's the matter, Rogers? It too warm in here for you?" Gibbs continued leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms over his chest.

"No, si…no." Rogers said in a voice barely above a whisper.

"You're sweating, you need some air?" Gibbs continued leaning in close again. "I'll let you have some if you just tell me what I want to know, come on. Don't let Powell beat you, then you don't get a deal, it's straight up. And you know Powell's going to throw the murder wrap on you," Gibbs said with a smile. Rogers' eyes snapped to Gibbs and his mouth opened and closed. There was genuine shock on his face and Gibbs new someone else was involved.

"I didn't murder anyone," he whispered his eyes wide with panic.

"Sure you did, Commander Powell said you did," Gibbs said with a shrug, leaning back in his chair and stifling a yawn.

"I didn't," he said a little more forceful.

"Then tell me who did, Captain," Gibbs said with cold eyes. Rogers studied him a bit before he shook his head.

"I can't," he said, his voice almost a whine.

"Sure you can," Gibbs said.

"No I can't. I don't know who did it," Rogers said leaning forward onto the table spreading his hands.

"Tell me who else is involved in your little weapons scam," Gibbs said with little emotion.

"I deal with Tyrell, that's it. I swear," he said with his hands in the air in surrender.

"Wrong answer. We know you met at Powell's off base housing with five other men. We know Powell and Deeves are two of them. Name the other three," Gibbs said slamming his hand down on the table making Rogers nearly jump out of his skin.

"I don't know names," he pleaded.

"Ranks," Gibbs said.

"We don't come in uniform," he said shaking his head. "I don't KNOW them!"

"You don't expect me to believe that do you, Captain?" Gibbs said with a smile. "Tell me or you do hard time for the murder of Lt. Commander Johanna Conrad."

"The only other one I know is Gunny Kevin Dangle," he said quickly as he closed his eyes and shook his head. "He's the only one I know."

Tony looked at Ziva and then left the room to get what he could on Gunnery Sergeant Kevin Dangle. Ziva continued to watch the exchange between Gibbs and Rogers. She knew the other man was telling the truth now, but she also sensed he was hiding something, or covering for someone. She glanced at Gibbs and figured he thought the same thing. Gibbs continued his questioning.

"That's a start. So we have you in shipping, and Powell and Deeves in siphoning surplus. Dangle runs the deals? He gets the buyers?"

"Yeah, Kev runs the deals. He places orders with Ty and then Deeves and some other guy get…"

"What other guy?" Gibbs barked making Rogers jump once again. The man scrambled to compose his jumbled brain, taking a deep breath with his eyes closed before continuing.

"I don't know that's Tyrell's area. Look I just know he's a white boy with blonde hair. Works with Deeves in the paperwork. After the numbers are fixed I get the order to send out and I ship it when I ship other munitions to troops over seas," Rogers said finally realizing he was in for the murder if he didn't tell what he knew.

"So who murdered Commander Conrad?"

"I don't know I was at Norfolk," Rogers said sitting back in his chair and throwing his hands in the air.

"We know Powell is overseas, you claim to be in Norfolk and if the alibi checks out, that leaves Ensign Deeves, and Gunny Dangle. Now we still have two mystery men, Rogers, who the hell is in this with you!"

"I don't, know the one guy, he's navy. Shit I only know Deeves because that asshole got fucked up in his paperwork and the bastard got investigated. Damn near destroyed us!"

"Who fixed the problem, Captain," Gibbs said in a low growl. It was then that his cell phone chirped. He pulled it from his belt without thinking still eyeing Captain Rogers. He broke the contact to look at the display screen. He didn't recognize the number and frowned wondering why he was getting a call at midnight from a number he didn't know and then he remembered giving Nicole his cell number. "Wait here."

Rogers looked at him as if he was crazy, like he had a choice. Gibbs stood still staring at his cell phone and walked from the room. Once in the hallway he flipped it open putting it to his ear.

"Gibbs," he said with his normal gruff.

"Jeez, Gibbs, maybe you should get some more sleep, you wouldn't be so crabby," Nicole said into his ear. Gibbs smiled when he heard her voice.

"You just pulled me from interrogation, Kido, I was in Special Agent mode," Gibbs said softly.

"Still working?" she asked surprised.

"I told you I'm never home; besides it's a pretty special case."

"It's about my mom?" she asked the pain evident in her voice.

"Yeah. How come you are awake?"

"I can't sleep," she said quietly.

"Did you try?"

"I'm afraid. I had a bad nightmare last night and I hurt my head."

"Hurt your head?" Gibbs asked leaning against the wall.

"I tripped and fell into the dresser," she said almost embarrassed. Gibbs smiled.

"You really gotta watch those things, they bite."

"Tell me about it," she said with a smile.

"Did you talk about your dream?"

"It wasn't a dream, Gibbs, it was a nightmare. I scared the other girl here."

"What do you mean?"

"I…I told her and I was mean about it," she said with a sigh.

"Did you talk to a grown up about it, Kido?"

"No," she said fighting to hold back the tears. "Not really."

"I'll find him I promise then you can sleep better at night," he said with clenched eyes, his fist balled at his side head beating softly against the wall. Ziva popped her head out of observation, took one look at Gibbs, and went back inside giving him privacy.

"He waits for me in the darkness, Gibbs," she said as the tears started to fall.

"It's ok, Kido, it's ok," he said softly. She didn't reply. He waited another moment. "Kido?"

Still no reply and Gibbs felt his chest tighten. He could hear her in the background of the phone but she wouldn't talk to him. He fought the panic that surged through him. "Gibbs," she said in a tiny whisper. He had to strain to hear her. "Someone is in the house," she said in a strained voice.

"Kido, hide right now. Where are you?" Gibbs asked frantic.

"I don't know somewhere in the city, I don't know, Gibbs," she said frantic. He could tell she was crying now. Gibbs felt the anger boil over in his blood and then the unthinkable happened. He heard her muffled scream over the phone and then it was dead.

He looked at his phone in disbelief as he felt his muscles constrict and his chest tighten. Anger ripped through him as well as guilt and fear. He crashed back into the interrogation room scaring Rogers to the point where the man sprang to his feet the chair underneath him tumbling to the floor.

"Who is working this with you?" Gibbs roared leaning on the table. Rogers' eyes grew wide with fear as he registered the severe change in his interrogator.

"I already told you," he said with his hands in the air. Ziva came around to the door and stepped inside, Gibbs didn't even register her being there.

"Fucking tell me right now who's in this with you, who killed the Commander!"

"Gibbs," Ziva said with warning in her voice, but Gibbs was oblivious.

"If one hair on that child's body is harmed," he breathed in a low growl.

"What child!" Rogers screamed fearing that he was in a lose lose situation. He looked at Ziva for help and the Mossad officer walked up to her boss and placed a firm hand on his shoulder.

"Gibbs we need to speak in the hallway right now," she said. For the first time Gibbs realized she was in the room with him. Ziva locked eyes with him and the anger that flowed through his blue orbs scared Ziva. He looked back at Rogers one more time with hatred.

"Enough of this I can find her on my own," he spat at the other man and then turned brushing past Ziva and heading towards the door. He nearly crashed into Tony in the hallway and didn't even stop. Tony stood dumbfounded his head shifting from trailing Gibbs to looking at Ziva.

"Something is wrong," Ziva said as Tony came up next to her.

"You think? What got into him?" Tony said as the two walked after him.

"Took a phone call then stormed in and ripped Captain Rogers a big one," Ziva said.

"New one," Tony corrected.

"Whatever," Ziva said as the two approached Gibbs in the bullpen, his phone to his ear, cell phone in hand.

TBC…


	29. Darkness Descends

**Chapter Twenty Nine: Darkness Descends**

The flight was uneventful as McGee soared once again towards the west coast. Tony had called ahead and arranged a pickup and housing for McGee when he arrived, as well as the suspects to be taken into custody. As McGee got off the plane he was met by Lt. Colonel Joseph Brack.

"Special Agent McGee?" the man asked him and McGee nodded. "I'm Lt. Colonel Brack, United States Marine Corps. I was told to escort you to the prisoner."

"Prisoner? There should be two," McGee said slinging his bag over his shoulder walking next to Brack.

"Only have one, an Ensign," Brack said with a shrug. "Guess they couldn't find the other guy."

They went to where Ensign Deeves was being held and Brack told McGee he would take him to his housing once he was finished. The Marine then turned and left as McGee watched the young man in the holding room. McGee pushed the door open and slowly walked to the table, setting his bag down next to the chair before taking a seat. Ensign Deeves looked up at him with frightened eyes.

"I'm Special Agent Timothy McGee, NCIS. I'm sure you know why you've been detained," McGee began as he stared the other man in the eyes. He could see Deeves quivering with fear.

"I don't understand what's going on," the man said with a shaky voice.

"You're being brought up on charges, Ensign Deeves."

"What kind of charges? What is going on?" the young man voiced, but McGee could tell the ensign already knew why he was there.

"Let's make this easier on everyone, Deeves, ok? Just drop the act and tell me what you know. Make a deal and tell me who's the lead on this."

"I don't know," Deeves began again.

"You're going to be charged with murder, Ensign Deeves," McGee said cutting the man off. McGee watched as sweat popped out on the man's forehead and his eyes shook with fear as he thought about his predicament.

"What? Who?"

"Lt. Commander Johanna Conrad," McGee said leaning back in the chair.

"Oh fuck, the lawyer lady?" Deeves said putting a hand up to his head. He started to shake and closed his eyes tightly. "I…she left the base, I didn't know she was…murdered."

"Tell me what happened," McGee said leaning forward again on the table.

"I fucked up. I almost got brig time. I turned in the wrong paperwork, Christ I was cleared of any wrong doing but she wouldn't fucking quit. They warned her but she wouldn't fucking quit. God damn it. She's really dead?"

"Yes, and if you don't start from the beginning this is going to look very bad on you, Ensign, you understand that?"

"Fuck. They recruited me," he began slowly.

"Who?"

"Ty and Mike," he replied with closed eyes.

"Ty and Mike who? The whole story, Deeves, you need to give details," McGee said. The young man simply nodded and ran a hand over his face before continuing.

"Ok. I was just assigned to San Diego, which was great for me. And then I start my job, keeping surplus and maintaining the munitions bunker. I'm there about a week when Commander Tyrell Powell and Lt. Mike Malford approached me. They told me they needed my help and that I'd be compensated for my efforts. I didn't know what they were doing honestly. I was just fixing the numbers to what they wanted."

"Then what happened?"

"I turned in the wrong sheet and some items were noted as missing. Since it was my report I got the heat. But that lawyer lady was investigating and Ty was sweating it. Then he somehow got an Admiral to step in and cover this shit up. Tyrell busted my balls but officially I was cleared of all wrong doing. O fuck, I got her killed," he said close to tears.

"Who was the Admiral, Deeves? Why'd he fix things?"

"I…I don't remember. He was a two star that I do remember and Tyrell seemed to know him well. But his name, it was Irish, something Patrick. I remember it was something like that because my name is Patrick."

"And the other man involved is Lt. Malford?"

"Yeah, Mike he works with me in the numbers part. There are other guys that come together at Ty's house off base; two are marines that I don't know. I don't even know their names."

McGee checked his watch. It was almost midnight in DC. He debated calling but figured that he just might catch someone in the bullpen. They were working this case hard so no one was going home 'early'. He told Ensign Deeves to sit tight and then found a quiet place pulling out his cell phone. He dialed Tony first and waited as it rang. He got his voice mail so he tried Ziva instead, same. He then tried Gibbs on a whim but also was directed to voice mail. He mumbled under his breath and then made the rounds on cell phones, again starting with Tony.

* * *

He sat patiently waiting. Finally the time had come that he was able to move. The house was quiet, still, and asleep. He moved with little disturbance to the world around him, making absolutely no noise. He reached the house and deftly picked the lock in short order, slipping in the door before pulling it closed once again.

He moved steadily through the house quietly, eyes darting from shadow to shadow, form to form. He was expecting surprises; it was what kept him in the game. He moved swiftly up the stairs and around a corner remembering from earlier the location of the two rooms that dimmed out early. The children's rooms. He came to the first one in the hallway and tested the knob. It turned easily in his hand and he pushed his shoulder into the door lightly popping it from the jamb and peering inside.

In the room were two boys, soundly sleeping in their beds. He quickly pulled the door shut and moved further down the hall to the second room. He again twisted the knob and forced the door slowly in, this time being rewarded with the sight of a sleeping girl. He walked quietly around the door and up to the first bed. He looked at the sleeping child and shook his head; this was not the girl he wanted.

He turned to the other bed and froze in his tracks. He felt his heart rate increase as adrenaline pumped into his blood stream. His mind reeled with the slightest urge of panic before he corralled himself and eased his mind. Plan B. She had to be close by; no one had left the house since he had watched them go to sleep. He backtracked from the room and closed the door softly behind him. He searched the rest of the upstairs rooms even peaking in on the two sleeping adults.

His mind surged as he gritted his teeth at his misfortune. His hands clamped and released in balls as he worked the fury from his muscles. He felt his chest tighten with rage at having to look for the girl. He stopped on the bottom step and took a moment to compose his mind once again. After he was calm he looked around the large living room. There was no sign of the girl. He checked the kitchen next and then headed to a back hallway. He came to a door and heard a hushed, harsh whisper of a child on the other side and smiled.

His smile faltered when he entered the room quickly and wrapped a hand over the face of the child that was about to scream. But the damage was done; she had been on the phone with someone while he took control. He hung the phone up with his free hand and tossed it onto the desk. The girl snaked and fought under his grasp causing him to have to restrain her with both arms before lifting her from her feet and making his way back to the front door. He checked the hall and found it empty the house still quiet and dark. He stealthily moved outside, sliding the locks in place as he did so. The girl fought him with raging power as she struggled to free herself from his grasp. The effort made him smile as he held her deftly to his chest.

After carrying her to his car and setting her next to him, hand still clamped firmly over her mouth, he started the vehicle and drove off with his prize. He took her to the safe house he had set up earlier and carried her kicking and mumbling under the power of his hand to the room he had prepared for her.

After locking the door, with her on one side and him on the other, he went to change his clothes and clean up. He calmed his mind once again and prepared himself to interrogate the child. There was little time but he knew this was not to be rushed. He also needed to contact Tyrell in Iraq and let him know there might be heat coming.

After he was cleaned, changed, and composed he returned to the door, unlocking it quickly. He slipped inside before the girl had a chance to move and stood in front of it. She stared at him with cold hard eyes and he admired her gumption. He smiled at her and she only glared a little harder at him.

"Gibbs is going to kill you," she spat at him making his smile turn into a grin.

* * *

McGee was frustrated as no one answered their cell phones either. Ziva and Tony's both rang before going to voicemail whereas Gibbs' went straight in. He left messages on all three phones. He regrouped his thoughts and sought out Lt. Colonel Brack.

"Lt. Colonel, I need someone to bring Lt. Mike Malford in for questioning," McGee said. The other man nodded picking up a phone instantly and dialing a number. He spoke with someone for a moment before he hung up and turned back to McGee.

"They're getting him now. Can I ask what's going on?" Brack replied.

"These men are suspected in a weapons trafficking ring. We believe one of the members of this ring murdered Lt. Commander Conrad," McGee answered. Brack simply nodded with a solemn face. They waited in silence for Malford to be brought in for questioning. Soon the man was there and McGee set to interrogating him.

The answers to his questions mirrored those of Ensign Deeves, but with less fear and shaking. The man sat emotionless in the room with McGee spewing answers to his questions. But again there was no solid name for the Admiral. Both man said he was connected to Commander Tyrell Powell. McGee nodded and left the room once again trying to make contact with someone back in Washington DC. After failing once again he decided to call it a night, arranging for the two men to be held overnight. Brack then took McGee to his own home where McGee fell soundly asleep almost as soon as the light was out.

* * *

Abby looked around at the evidence she had in front of her. She knew something was missing, but she couldn't figure out what. She looked at each piece again and recounted in her head what seemed to fit together. Her eyes landed on the fire tools set in front of her. It was here that she noticed something wrong. She studied it and realized a piece was missing from the set. She searched the entire lab, everything that had been brought in from the Conrad house and found nothing. She smiled to herself in admiration.

"You almost escaped me," she said to herself as she picked up the small scoop shovel. "But I am smarter than you."

All the other tools were accounted for except the poker. She knew from Ducky that the wounds were caused by something with three sharpened edges with one edge different. She remembered the fire poker from growing up, the three sharp edges of the poking end, with the hook on one side. She bounced with excitement as she headed towards autopsy to see if Ducky was still there. She found the room dark and frowned, feeling some of her energy deflate, but decided she didn't need to ask Ducky about it. Instead she went to the bullpen, and found the team in frantic search. She walked into the chaos and was not noticed, making her wonder what was going on. She grabbed Tony by the arm as he hurried past.

"Not now, Abby," he said quickly but she didn't release him.

"I think I know the murder weapon," Abby replied causing Tony to stop and look at her. "The fire poker. It's missing from the set. Killer probably took it with them."

"Great work, Abby," Tony said with a smile that quickly faded before he moved on with his prior task. Abby was a bit disappointed that he wasn't as excited as her, but she could tell something serious had happened in the case, and from the look of Gibbs, it wasn't good.

TBC…


	30. Overload

**Chapter Thirty: Overload**

Tony walked swiftly away after Abby told him about the prospective murder weapon. He had been ordered to re-interrogate Captain Rogers 'using any means necessary' by Gibbs. He worked his way into the room and sat down across from a frightened Rogers.

"What's going on?" Rogers asked in a harsh whisper of a voice. "That guy's crazy."

"An eleven year old girl, who that guy is close to, is presumed missing right now," Tony started in a low angry voice. His eyes had hardened as he stared at the man across from him. "Her mother was murdered a couple days ago, and now we think that the man who did it took her as well."

"See I didn't kill her I told him that!"

"Tell me who did or you go down as accessory to murder and aiding and abetting," Tony snapped.

"What? I had nothing to do with this! I admit I am part of the weapons deal, I'll testify to that, but I had NOTHING to do with this murder or the kidnapping!" Rogers bellowed the fear heavy in his eyes as his body shook.

"Tell me who else is involved," Tony growled as his cell phone made a beeping noise. Rogers was breathing heavy now as he thought about what to say. Tony pulled his cell phone from his belt and noticed he had a message. He tossed the phone to the table and stared at Rogers again.

"I already told the other guy," Rogers pleaded.

"Who's the top?"

"What?"

"Powell, You, and Deeves. None of you are the top, who's running this show. We know Dangle isn't top dog either, come on, tell me who is," Tony continued.

Rogers didn't answer him as the man's eyes dropped to the table, studying his own hands. Tony was running out of patience and his phone beeping again reminded him there was a message. He leaned farther over the table, closing the gap between him and Rogers, their faces mere inches apart.

"You were about to tell Agent Gibbs who fixed the problem with Deeves," Tony reminded the man. Rogers looked up slightly confused for a moment before the earlier conversation clicked in his head.

"I…it was an Admiral. Admiral Kirkpatrick from San Diego. He stepped in and covered our tracks, Powell got him."

"How else is he involved?"

"I don't know, we meet up at Ty's house but he's never there. There's me, and Deeves, this other Navy guy. Of course Ty is there. And Kev comes. Then there is Another Navy guy, low rank, I can't remember his name but he works, shit I think he works for the Admiral or something. I don't remember," Rogers said shaking his head. He was not sure of anything anymore.

"Sit tight," Tony said as he grabbed his cell phone and left the room. He dialed into this voice mail and listened to the message McGee had left him. He then called McGee's cell phone.

McGee sat up in a panic when the cell phone went off in his ear. He had fallen sound asleep and was disoriented for a moment before his brain registered where he was. He reached for his phone, seeing Tony's name on the screen.

"Yeah," McGee said trying to shake the sleep from his voice.

"Sleeping on the job, Probie?" Tony said quickly.

"There was nothing more for me to do out here, Tony. I left messages, no one picks up there phones out there."

"What'd you find?"

"I questioned Ensign Deeves and Lt. Malford but no one could find Rogers, I think he slipped the base."

"Nope, Probie, he's in custody here."

"What?"

"He was shipped to Norfolk with Lariman, we have him in custody here," Tony replied. McGee went on to relay the information he had gathered in the two interviews as Tony filled him in on everything that was happening in Washington.

"What do you want me to do?" McGee asked when they were all caught up.

"Sit tight there until morning. Bring those two here for further questioning," Tony answered before ending the call. McGee slipped back to sleep while Tony went to the bullpen to find Gibbs.

"What did you get," Gibbs said landing cold eyes on Tony. The look made his spine shiver.

"Gave me the name Admiral Kirkpatrick. Captain Lariman mentioned seeing this same Admiral argue with Commander Conrad before she transferred."

"Does he meet with them at the house?"

"No. Rogers said it's Deeves, him, Powell, a Navy guy that McGee identified as Lt. Mike Malford, Dangle and another low ranking Navy man he didn't know the name of but thought worked for Admiral Kirkpatrick," Tony continued.

"We got five of the six that run this thing. What have we heard from Iraq? Has Powell been taken into custody?"

"They have him now waiting on an Agent for interrogation, should be there within the hour," Ziva said from her desk. Gibbs nodded.

"Find this Admiral Kirkpatrick and everything you can on him. Also I want the name of this other man Rogers mentioned," Gibbs said the strain in his voice causing major concern in his team. "Find that little girl."

Tony watched Gibbs a moment longer, before remembering what Abby had told him earlier. "Boss, Abby told me earlier she thinks the murder weapon was a fire poker and that the killer most likely took it with him when he left."

Gibbs simply nodded his attention glued to the computer in front of him as he searched for information on the Admiral. He could feel his chest tightening with each breath as he fought to maintain his composure. Memories of a case from the past crashed through his mind, mixing with the thoughts of this one. He was confused and disoriented. He was frustrated with himself.

"Ziva, have you found where they housed the girl!" he barked at her loudly making her jump. She looked up at him with cautious eyes.

"Social Services have sent Metro PD to the location of the house. They have yet to arrive I'm monitoring their progress," she replied. Gibbs nodded and stood. He felt light headed and almost tipped to the side. No one noticed which he was grateful for. He walked stiff legged towards the elevator, punching the button hard. The light came on and he leaned heavily against the wall as he waited.

The ding brought him back upright to his feet but his eyes remained closed as he fought to maintain control. The emotional tidal wave cascading through his very core was overwhelming to say the least. He had failed, he had broken his promise. The images of Kelly flooded his mind, only this time Nicole's face was superimposed over his own daughter's. The scar on his shoulder flared with remembered pain as his arm went numb from memory. The doors slid open, the world moving in slow motion as he stepped forward, opening his eyes. Director Shepard stood motionless in the middle of the elevator, stopped short of stepping off on the floor. She stared at him in his current condition and reached out for him.

He avoided her touch, moving swiftly around her to the back of the car, leaning his forehead against the far wall. Jen didn't leave the car, instead waiting for the doors to close and the machine to move slightly before she pulled Gibbs' trick and hit the emergency stop.

The elevator jolted to a stop, the lights flickering briefly, as Gibbs stumbled to the side, his equilibrium trashed from the tirade of thoughts and emotions attacking his very sanity. Jen walked up to him afraid for his well being and gently reached a tender hand to his shoulder. He shuddered under her touch, finally feeling the overload of emotion that had plagued him since the phone call. He turned around and leaned against the wall eyes clenched closed, fists balled tightly, tears squeezing from his closed eyelids.

Gibbs tried desperately to control his body's motions and reactions, but his breathing had become erratic, his heart rate was too high, and his mind was lost in a torrent of emotion and memory. He felt his knees give way, buckling under the pressure of his mind, his guilt, his anger, and his fear. Jen tried to catch him but his weight was too great and her speed was too slow.

He collapsed to the floor, knocking her down with him as he shook with release of emotion. Jen kneeled beside him and wrapped her arms around him pulling him close to her. He turned his face and buried it in her chest, shaking and crying. Jen had never expected such a break down for a man like Gibbs. Her heart broke as she tried to console him, calm him, help him. Finally she heard him speak.

"I failed," he said in a hoarse voice against her chest. "I failed her, I failed everyone. I'm a failure."

"Shhh," Jen said quietly rubbing a hand through his hair, the other making circles on his back. "You didn't fail, Jethro."

"But I did. I promised her he wouldn't get her, now he has her and I can't find her," he said. "I failed her, just like I failed Kelly," he said, his body shaking once again as another wave of emotion crashed though him. Jen felt her own tears falling, not knowing how to bring him around.

"You haven't failed her yet, Jethro," Jen said. "Go find her, bring her home."

"Home," he said dryly. "To a home that is empty."

This new hopelessness from him scared her. She feared for his own safety now, and his sense of mind. What shape was he in mentally? She held him tighter and caressed his back and head trying to find the right words to snap him out of this current melt down.

"I failed you too," he said softly, his body still quaking from the torrent of emotional distress.

"How?" she asked him laying her cheek on top of his head.

"I'm a lost cause, I don't know how to respond to other people," he said his voice a ghost of his regular self. He seemed so small and fragile to her at that moment that she could hardly believe that it was Jethro Gibbs huddled against her chest in the middle of an elevator at NCIS, stopped between floors, having a mental melt down.

"You didn't fail me," she replied in a whisper.

"But I did, I showed you part but wouldn't let you have it all. I kept my secrets, I failed you. I failed Nicole, she's going to die."

"Not if you can save her, Jethro," Jen said with more boldness to her voice. "You can save her still. You need to pull yourself together and find her, she still has a chance, and so do you."

Gibbs was silent while he consumed her words, mulling them over in his mind, formulating meanings and intentions. He finally pulled his head from her chest, leaning back against the wall. He looked up at her, with eyes caked in sadness, sorrow, and fear. She reached out and cupped his jaw line with her hand. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the contact.

"I'm sorry," he whispered with his eyes still closed. The utterance of an apology was so rare from him that she sat shocked at the words. She shook the stun from her head so she could reply.

"For what?"

"For my behavior, seven years ago," he said in a whisper, turning his head and kissing her palm. She closed her own eyes for a brief moment before looking at him again. She didn't respond, simply shaking her head in acknowledgement.

"There's an eleven year old girl out there that needs your help," she said. She watched as the emotion disappeared slowly from his face, his eyes still holding the turmoil for a moment. Then she nodded when Special Agent Gibbs was back. He stood up and wiped at his face, taking a couple deep breaths to settle his erratic heart, before reaching down and helping Jen to her feet.

He reached out and released the emergency stop and the elevator moved once again, jarring when it started up. They ended up on the floor for the lab and Gibbs pushed the button to go back up to the bullpen. He didn't know how he would accomplish it but he knew in his heart that this time he would save the girl even if it meant his own life.

TBC…


	31. Living the Dream

**Chapter Thirty One: Living the Dream**

Nicole stood against the back wall hugging her self across her chest, shivering slightly from the cold. She watched the man that had taken her; all her threat had done was make his sick smile turn into a feral grin. She was scared. He stayed just inside the door pulling his phone from his pocket and dialing a series of numbers. She thought it was way to long to be a phone number.

He had the phone to his ear for a while before he mumbled under his breath and hit the end button with force. Nicole surveyed the room with her eyes, looking for anything that would work in her favor, but found nothing. She also noticed the only way out was the door behind him.

He dialed another time, this time short enough to be a phone number and waited. He turned to the side and was talking in a low voice into the phone. She couldn't understand what he was saying but she heard him refer to someone by the name of Travis. She filed it away and grew more nervous as the man seemed to grow more agitated with each sentence in the conversation.

Finally he was simply looking at his phone shaking his head, the anger evident in his expression. He then tossed it on the table next to the door and took a step towards her. She sank deeper into the recess of the wall, trying to make herself invisible. He took another step towards her, the whites of his eyes glowing in the near darkness of the room. Nicole felt herself tremble as he came nearer to her.

The grin on his face was sending shockwaves of terror up and down her spine as she tried desperately to think of a way out of her predicament. He stopped and stared at her, looking her up and down. He cocked his head to the side before he spoke in a low dangerous tone.

"Your mother caused me a lot of pain," he said. Nicole's eyes widened with fear as she recognized the voice from her nightmares. She felt her knees go weak and her shoulders slump. She fell to the floor tears running down her cheeks unable to scream, paralyzed with fear.

He came another step closer and stopped, squatting down to be on her level as she quivered on the floor. Her fear finally causing her bladder to let go, soaking her pants, and leaving a puddle underneath her. The man smiled at what he had caused, showing her even white teeth.

"Now it seems that everyone is talking," he continued as he reached along his belt. He pulled out a long jagged knife, bringing it around in front of him, showing the young girl the blade. "This is better than your mother got, but I'm short on time if I want to disappear. A shame I lose the Navy, but I'm sure I'll find something for me."

As the man spoke to her she felt her survival instincts overriding the paralyzing effect of the fear. She scooted herself together more, coiling her muscles, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. The man came at her with the knife then and she knew it was now or never. This was the point where she either died or she made the best of her situation and tried to escape.

He thrust forward with the knife coming at her chest and she twisted and sprung to the left bringing her knee up with her. From his position he was unguarded for an attack and her knee clipped his, knocking him off balance. Nicole was on her feet in a flash as the man tumbled to his side. He lashed out with the knife catching her on the hip, the same leg that she had ripped open when she fell from her window the day her mother died.

She whimpered in pain as the knife cut flesh but the adrenaline and survival instinct drove her to drop her other leg back and kick with all her might, coming in contact with the man's balls. She heard him grunt as his face instantly turned red. The knife fell from his hand and she scrambled to the door as he rounded his body back to his feet. She grabbed the phone as she passed by, ripping the door open and sprinted into the darkness of the empty house. She was lost, in a darkness that she had dreamed about.

She heard the man coming, and struggled to clear her mind, to think of what to do next. She needed to get away, far away from this place. She needed a place to hide. She sprinted down the long hallway towards what she remembered as being a staircase. She could hear him grunting as he reached the door and stumbled into the hallway.

He was yelling at her now but she didn't hear; her heart was pounding in her ears, the blood sounding like a tidal wave of water splashing all around her. She was disoriented and stumbled. She caught herself and winced when she put her weight on the hip with the gash in it. Her hand instinctively dropped to the wound and came away covered in sticky red blood.

She pushed herself to run faster, finding the stairwell and managing to stay on her feet as she let her momentum carry her down, sometimes taking three steps at a time. She reached the bottom on the run and headed towards light on the other side of the room. She could hear him moving down the hallway towards the stairs now. Her hand gripped the phone tightly as terror surged through her body. The darkness was smothering her as she tried frantically to get to the light. She felt like she was drowning in the abyss as she ran towards the nearest door.

She felt a little lift when she reached the doorway and came into contact with some light. It was from the moon outside, but it was still a break from the utter darkness of the interior of the house. She looked around frantically for a door, and found one to her left. She surged ahead, limping on her sore leg as she pushed herself to the limit. He was coming down the stairs, and picking up speed. He had recovered from her blow, and she knew that knife was in his hand.

She made it outside, into the brisk cold air. It made her shudder in her wet pants but she pushed on, racing to the side of the house. All of the houses around were quiet, no lights on anywhere, and no cars in the driveways. She felt the panic well up inside her. Where had he taken her?

Her head whipped from side to side searching frantically for another human being, besides the one chasing her, as she ran into the street. She heard him come out the door, as it slammed behind him, his fury evident in his yelling. She panicked again, if he was yelling at her outside he wasn't afraid of someone hearing him.

She sprinted as fast as her legs could carry her, diverting from the open road as she was easy to spot moving through the moonlight. She felt the grass, wet beneath her feet, as she darted between two houses making her way into the back yard of one. Her path led her towards a wooded area and she scampered in to find shelter among the trees. She reached into her pocket, wincing as she brushed the wound on her leg.

Pulling out the matted, blood and urine soaked paper; she unfolded it so she could read his numbers. She dialed his cell phone and waited, watching from deep in the underbrush as the man searched the backyards for her. He had yet to come into the woods.

* * *

When the elevator doors opened on the bullpen Gibbs was his former self, cool, confident, and composed. His eyes held a redness to them from the tears, but it could be written off as lack of sleep. He wasn't worried. Director Shepard followed behind him, a small knowing smile on her lips as he rejoined his team. She hung back, taking a seat on a desk watching.

"Tell me what we got," he said calmly as he came up behind the two agents. There was a picture of a man on the plasma screen.

"Rear Admiral Robert James Kirkpatrick, that's him in the photo. He's been working out of San Diego since he reached two star status six years ago. We've linked him to Commander Powell through his interest in Ensign Deeves case," Tony said first.

"He's involved in a lot of weapons programs, the planning, building, and use of. He is a big supporter of keeping the armed forces, armed," Ziva added.

"Was a Navy Seal for most of his career, until age and injuries drove him to take a desk job," Tony continued.

"And do we know where he is?" Gibbs asked. The two agents looked at each other.

"On vacation is all we got," Tony said with a cringe. Gibbs closed his eyes. He knew in his gut this man was in the city right now and had Nicole.

"Ziva have we heard from Metro PD?" Gibbs barked looking at the face on the plasma screen, studying the eyes.

"They arrived at the Parks' residence a few minutes ago and are questioning the family right now," Ziva replied.

"Stay on that," Gibbs said.

"Does Kirkpatrick have any connection to DC? Does he have a place here?" Gibbs asked.

"Nothing that we can find, Boss, he seems to have disappeared for his vacation," Tony said.

"He's a Seal, Tony, it's what he's trained to do," Gibbs said sternly. Tony nodded slowly.

"Right," he said softly before turning back to his desk.

"Tony," Gibbs said still staring at the man on the screen, memorizing his face.

"Yeah, Boss?" Tony asked.

"We find the other man yet?" Gibbs asked.

"We're looking now. We have a man we think is who Rogers was talking about," Tony replied.

"Think?" Gibbs said breaking his glare from the screen and turning it on Tony. Director Shepard smiled, shaking her head slowly as Gibbs gaze landed on her sitting just outside his grouping of desks.

"Petty Officer Travis Mann, Boss, we think is the sixth man," Tony said clicking the remote and pulling up another picture.

"Gibbs, Admiral Kirkpatrick drives a 2005 black Chevy Malibu," Ziva said standing up behind her desk. Gibbs looked at her and nodded his approval.

"Could be our stalker," he said quickly before turning back to Tony. "Any ideas on where to find him?"

Tony eyed Gibbs carefully, assessing his mental state. Finally he looked down at his feet briefly before shaking his head no. Gibbs looked at Ziva who was on the phone again. She looked up at him, holding a finger up as she finished listening to someone. She hung up and stood.

"Gibbs, the Parks saw and heard nothing. No one in that house knew she was gone until they heard the cops banging on the front door…if she hadn't called you…"

"She'd be dead before anyone knew she was missing. We need to find her," he said the anger seeping into his voice again. "Tony, get back in there with Rogers. Find out how the Admiral can be contacted."

"Right, Boss, but I don't know…on it, Boss," Tony said and then quickly retreated from the bullpen after Gibbs flashed hard eyes at him. Ziva stood by her desk and stared at the man on the plasma screen.

"Ziva, get Travis Mann in here or get McGee to get him if he's in California. We need to talk to him," Gibbs barked. Jen stood and walked up to Gibbs, standing next to him looking at the screen.

"You'll find her," she whispered to him causing him to nod as Ziva used her computer to find Mann. They were standing together shoulders gently brushing when Gibbs' cell phone went off. He quickly yanked it from his belt and frowned at the number, before flipping it open.

TBC…


	32. Shadows in the Woods

**Chapter Thirty Two: Shadows in the Woods**

Gibbs put the phone to his ear quickly. "Kido?" he asked holding his breath waiting for an answer. There was a brief moment of silence that seemed to last years for Gibbs before he heard her respond.

"Gibbs," she said in a hoarse whisper. He could hear the sounds of night coming through the phone, but nothing of civilization.

"Where are you?" he asked hurriedly turning to Ziva as he did so.

"I don't know," she whispered with a voice caked in fear. "He's out there, Gibbs, he's coming."

"Can he see you?" Gibbs asked.

"No, not right now," she said, her voice strained.

"Sit tight, Kido, I'm coming," he said to her as he walked to Ziva's desk. "Get Abby up here now." Ziva nodded and picked up her own phone calling the lab.

"I'm really scared," Nicole said as he heard her shifting, the cracking of something drawing his attention.

"Don't move around, Kido, stay still. Where are you?"

"In the woods," she breathed tightly. "He's out in the yard, Gibbs, he's looking for me."

Ziva nodded to Gibbs that Abby was on her way up and Gibbs turned away from her thinking what he should tell the child on the other side of the line. He needed her to stay calm enough to stay hidden and not draw attention to herself.

"Are you ok? Did he hurt you?" Gibbs asked clenching his teeth, eyes squeezed shut as he waited for her answer.

"He cut me. It's bleeding, it hurts really bad," she replied. Gibbs felt he anger boil over inside as he glanced at the image of Kirkpatrick on the plasma screen. Jen touched him on the shoulder, wanting the answer to his question as well. He looked at her and she knew something had happened.

"Hang tight, Kido, we're working on getting to you," Gibbs said in a low soothing voice. He looked up when he saw movement coming towards him and noticed Abby looking slightly confused. He motioned her over to him.

"What's up, Gibbs?" she asked.

"I need you to trace the incoming call on my phone and pinpoint the location," Gibbs said quickly as he listened to the other side. Nicole had lapsed into silence, as he heard the night sounds and her breathing.

"It her?" Abby asked moving to McGee's desk and plopping down heavily before working the keyboard.

"Yes," Gibbs replied straining to listen to the phone.

Abby's fingers flew over the keyboard working her way into the system to track the phone number that Gibbs was connected to, working to pinpoint where Nicole was. The minutes seemed like hours to Gibbs as the time slowly ticked by, each second another step towards disaster.

"Abby," he growled with closed eyes, Nicole was still silent on the other end.

"Almost there, Boss," Abby said, her fingers frantically manipulating the keys. "She's on the outside of town, subdivision under development, but that's as close as I can get you."

"Address," Gibbs barked as he grabbed keys from his desk and started towards the elevator. Jen trotted up next to him falling in step. Abby told him where the subdivision was and then watched as Gibbs and the Director headed towards the elevator. "Ziva, grab Tony. Meet us there."

Ziva jumped up from her desk clipping her gun to her waist line before trotting out of the bullpen to find Tony in interrogation. Abby sat at McGee's desk staring at the empty bullpen, her stomach in knots.

Once the elevator doors were closed Gibbs closed his eyes, phone still pressed to his ear. "I'm coming, Kido, stay put. I'm coming to get you, to bring you home."

* * *

Ziva rapped on the door that Tony sat behind and popped her head, motioning for him to join her in the hall. He could see the urgency in her eyes. He was getting no where with Rogers anyway so he stood and left the room. He met up with Ziva in the hallway.

"What?" he asked.

"Gibbs found the girl, wants us to meet him and the Director there," Ziva replied quickly before turning and heading towards the elevators. Tony stood for a moment before his brain kicked into gear and he quickly caught up with Ziva.

"She's alive right?" Tony asked.

"For the time being," Ziva whispered as the doors shut. They rode the elevator in silence before Tony grabbed his gun from his desk drawer then met up with Ziva again at the vehicle.

* * *

Gibbs was quiet in the car as he drove at frantic high speeds across the city. He felt time slipping away from him. His body was tense with fear, anger, and hope. His muscles felt coiled tight, ready to snap.

Jen was sitting next to him, hand firmly gripping the handle to keep herself in the seat she was occupying. She would not comment on his driving tonight, this was a special case, where dangerous speeds and unsafe driving were acceptable.

Gibbs continued to listen to the phone, worrying about battery life. Nicole would whisper to him occasionally, telling him what was going on. He continued to reassure her that he was coming. She was quiet for a while before Gibbs heard a frantic whisper in her ear.

"Gibbs, there's two now," she said straining her voice to be quiet.

"Two what?" he asked.

"Two men. Another man just showed up. They're talking by the houses."

"Ok, I'm almost there, sit tight. I'm going to get you," Gibb reiterated as he took another turn. They were less than five minutes away. Gibbs pushed the accelerator down but it was already on the floor board. He bit at his lip as the phone started to beep, signaling a low battery. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He would make it to her in time, he told himself.

Jen looked at him but remained quiet. It was not a time to talk, they were going to make it, and no words would make the time go by faster. The car skidded around another corner and they saw the entrance to the construction site. Gibbs slowed down, turning into the cul-de-sac and turned off his lights. He didn't want to announce his arrival. They started slowly down the road searching for any sign of human activity.

"Nicole, where are you?" Gibbs asked. "We're at the development." He received a crackle of an answer before his phone shut off. "Shit," he said as he pulled the phone down and looked at it.

* * *

Kirkpatrick searched the yards looking for the girl. He cursed aloud, as he continued to find nothing. He walked up and down the front of the houses looking for tracks of where she had gone; he couldn't find the trail in the dark. He squatted behind one of the houses and closed his eyes, clearing his mind. He would wait, once Travis showed up they would be able to search more ground.

He waited for what seemed an eternity before he heard a vehicle pull slowly into the subdivision and he slowly stood and moved from the shadows walking out to the road and standing where he could be seen. He smiled when he saw Travis parking. The younger man stepped from the vehicle and looked around, spotting Kirkpatrick standing in front of one of the houses. They came together and Travis could read the stress in Kirkpatrick's eyes.

"How bad is it?" Kirkpatrick asked.

"They have Deeves, Malford, Powell, and Rogers in custody. They're working on getting Dangle. They know your name, and are on their way to getting mine. I think it's time to cut and run, Rob," the younger man answered him with a shake of the head.

"One last deed," Kirkpatrick said cocking his head to the side. "First tell me about who is working this case."

"A real hard head named Gibbs. Guess one of the shining stars of NCIS. His team is working this pretty hard right now, number one priority. They put all this together in just over four days, Rob. I think we really need to cut and run."

"Travis, there is an eleven year old girl that got the better of me out here right now. After I take care of her, we can make a run for it. You have the passports and cash with you?"

"Of course, Sir. I've got two clean passports for both of us, and enough cash to get us somewhere safe. Just tell me what friends will take us in."

"Let's find the girl then we can make plans. I also need a clean phone, the girl has mine."

"Rob, what happened?"

"Underestimated her, must be slipping. I'm told it happens with age."

"I have three clean cell phones that we can use for short periods of time. The numbers are routed through other accounts. They're hard to trace back to us."

"Let's find that little girl, my guess is she is in the woods right now, split up and take that side, I'll take the other. You find her, let a whistle and we meet back here."

"Alright," Travis said walking towards the woods. Kirkpatrick set off across the grass and came up to the edge of the woods he scanned the darkness looking for any sign of the girl. He knew she had on light colored clothing and should be easy to spot. He walked further into the brush and stopped once again. He took in the sounds of the night, filing each sound away and filtering what belonged. Then he heard the whisper and turned to that direction. He smiled when he saw a small scrape of clothing sticking out, with a small foot attached.

He moved towards her slowly, pulling the knife from its sheath, his eyes never leaving her foot. His movements were slow and calculated as he moved with no sound through the woods. He was coming up from behind on her now as he circled slowly through the thick underbrush. He was almost too her when he heard a second vehicle. The tires crunched the gravel in the road drawing his attention from the girl to look up.

He saw two people, and man and a woman, exit he vehicle looking around. The man was scanning the woods, his gun drawn, eyes taking in everything he saw. The woman was looking at Travis' car parked in the middle of the road. It was then that the girl sprang to her feet, breaking for the man and woman in the road. He made his move coming up swiftly behind her.

* * *

Nicole listened to Gibbs breathing on the phone, helping to calm her mind. She had never been so frightened in her life and just having a connection to him helped her cope with the paralyzing effects of the terror. He had told her he was almost there; he was coming to get her. She could see the two men still talking in the front of the house but then they split and went separate ways.

She lost sight of the younger man but the older one was coming towards the woods. She watched him as best she could without moving but soon he was gone from her line of sight. She heard Gibbs tell her he was there and she felt the first pang of relief soak her body. He was asking her where she was when the phone started to cut in and out, she told him where she was but the line was dead. The relief she felt just a moment ago, fled her body and panic replaced it.

She looked at the phone and saw that the call had been lost. Her connection to Gibbs was gone. But he was here, her mind told her, he was coming to get you, he promised to bring you home. It was then that she saw Gibbs and Jen get out of their car and scan the area. She felt the surge of excitement hit her again and she jumped up from her hiding place with every intention of running to him.

She had taken three steps when she felt a strong hand grip her shoulder, squeezing hard, bruising the flesh. She screamed in agony and surprise as she felt the knife come up to her throat. She was lifted from the ground and held, one arm across her shoulders holding the knife to her neck, the other tightly clamped over her hips.

* * *

Gibbs heard Nicole scream and his attention zeroed in on the area it had come from. There was the man from the photos, holding her, knife to throat. He felt the explosion of rage inside him as his gun came up and he moved quickly through the yard.

TBC…


	33. Covering Your Six

**Chapter Thirty Three: Covering Your Six**

Gibbs moved with ease onto the grassy lawn of the darkened back yard of the empty house. His gun up, sights locked on the man holding Nicole. He looked at her face; saw the wide fear ridden eyes, the dark maroon spot running down her pant leg and up the front of her shirt. His attention snapped back to the cold hard eyes of Admiral Kirkpatrick, ex-Seal.

The Admiral was circling to his left side stepping slowly. In order to keep the gun locked on him Gibbs head to also circle to his own left, turning his back towards the woods. He noticed Director Shepard checking the parked car. His mind was so focused on the man in front of him, nothing else in the surroundings matter. He would win this battle.

Gibbs saw Kirkpatrick flex his wrist and the knife pinched in closer on Nicole's neck. The girl left out a startled whimper as the blade sank slightly into her skin, nicking open a small spot. Kirkpatrick's lips curled upward in a feral smile as he saw the rage rush through Gibbs' eyes.

Gibbs took a step closer to Kirkpatrick but it only caused the man to apply a small amount of more pressure to the knife. He stopped, gun still raised deftly aimed at the man in front of him. Kirkpatrick shifted Nicole in his grip, bringing her into the line of fire for Gibbs' weapon.

Gibbs blinked and re-aimed his firearm. They stared at each other in silence, and the seconds passed into eternity. Gibbs could feel his heart rocketing in his chest, the noise of the blood surging through his head dampening his hearing, his eyes narrowed in peripheral vision as the blood flowed through his optical nerve. Hatred for the man in front of him exploded.

His thoughts were jumbled and scattered, some of Kelly, some of Nicole, some of the aftermath of before. He knew he needed to clear his mind; he needed to focus on his surroundings if he was going to pull out of this unscathed. He took a deep breath, holding it slightly before letting it out slowly. Kirkpatrick grinned, showing bright white teeth in the darkness.

The ever forward movement of time seemed to come to a screeching halt as they squared off to each other. Although only standing for a mere minute Gibbs felt like a lifetime had passed. His hands continued to grip his weapon keeping the sight locked on the man in front of him.

"Agent Gibbs, I presume," Kirkpatrick said with a sneer.

"Admiral Kirkpatrick," Gibbs replied in a steady voice.

"Seems like you've put the puzzle together," he continued.

"My team did," Gibbs replied.

"I was almost in the clear too, seems that asshole Deeves fucked me in the end after all."

"Started the ball rolling," Gibbs replied calmly.

"He was a class A fuck up for sure. How long did it take your team to come up with me?"

"Couple days," Gibbs replied circling a little to get a better angle. Kirkpatrick shifted slightly bringing Nicole into play again. Gibbs licked his lips as he waited for the moment to come.

"Couple days. Took that bitch Commander Conrad a couple months," Kirkpatrick said with another grin of perfect white teeth. Nicole kicked back with her good leg hitting the man in the thigh. "Oh, feisty one this one," he said ducking his head so his chin rested on her shoulder. The knife moved a little causing Nicole to cry out and close her eyes. His arm clamping her hips slid down slightly to hold her still. Gibbs gritted his teeth.

"Time is running out," Gibbs said through clenched teeth as he pulled the gun up slightly and took aim for the man's forehead. As he measured his shot he saw the grin widen on Kirkpatrick's face, as Nicole's eyes doubled in fear. She didn't have a chance to scream before a shot rang out.

"Only for you, Agent Gibbs," Kirkpatrick replied.

Gibbs heard the explosion of another gun and felt the impact slam into his right shoulder from behind. He stumbled forward and fell to the ground at Kirkpatrick's feet, the pain scorching through his body. His arm burned from his shoulder to his wrist where the hand was numb.

His weapon had been knocked from his hand on impact, and his brain seemed to be fuzzy. He shook his head to clear it and attempted to roll over. He felt pressure come down on the wound on his shoulder and he grunted as searing hot pain ricocheted through his arm. He then felt a boot under his chest, forcing his body to flip onto his back.

His eyes focused as he rolled, coming to a stop and looking up at the bright night sky. He looked to the side and saw Kirkpatrick handing Nicole to another man who held her in front of him. He looked the other way and saw Jen coming towards them with weapon drawn. Kirkpatrick dropped down to a knee next to Gibbs.

Gibbs was having trouble concentrating. He could feel the liquid of life leaking in profuse amounts from his wound, soaking his shirt in the front and back. His hand had absolutely no feeling in it, and the numbness was spreading up to his elbow. His upper arm thrummed with a dull ache the extended down his back and chest to his groin. His mind fluttered with incoherent thoughts as his vision started to falter.

"You're going into shock," Kirkpatrick said as he squatted next to Gibbs. Gibbs forced his eyes to round and focus on Kirkpatrick's face. "You didn't watch you six, Gibbs."

"Time to book, Rob. Fuck, there's someone coming up," the other man said pulling Nicole closer to him with his left arm as his right hand brought his firearm up. Gibbs rolled his head to the side, causing cascading pain. He saw Jen coming.

"I'll take care of her. Keep an eye on him," Kirkpatrick said standing and stepping over Gibbs' body. As his second foot came across Gibbs reached up with his left hand and gripped the heel of Kirkpatrick's boot. The man pitched forward, stumbling but catching himself with his hand before he sprawled to the ground. He turned and looked at Gibbs before hauling his right leg back and kicking with full force into Gibbs' rib cage.

The pain was excruciating as the force of the blow vibrated through his ribs. He was sure at least two cracked. The vibrations continued through his shoulder making the wound ache with unwarranted pain. Gibbs' body involuntarily shook as the pain traveled throughout.

He tried to sit up but his couldn't seem to control his muscles. He put all his effort into focusing his mind. He rolled his head again and looked at Nicole. She was crying now as the other man held her tightly. As he stared into the child's eyes he knew that there was no giving up in this one, there was no stopping. He rolled onto his side as the man watched Kirkpatrick.

Gibbs waited a moment, to let the pain subside before he summoned all his strength. He would have one shot he knew. There would only be enough strength for one attempt. He had the element of surprise but he knew if he did not succeed there was no tomorrow.

With everything he had, Gibbs lunged to his knees, pitching forward at the younger man standing with Nicole. The girl saw what he was doing and drew her elbow forward, before driving it as hard as she could backwards in to the man's groin. He doubled down bringing his head closer to Gibbs as his grip on her falter. She ran away from him as Gibbs grabbed the knife from his belt and thrust it forward. The sharp edge of the weapon punctured the man's throat, slicing him open.

Gibbs looked up at him as the other man's eyes widened in complete terror as his last breath chocked from his lungs. The blood dripped down the knife and onto Gibbs as he watched the life drain from the younger man's eyes. He then pushed with what he had left, knocking the dead man back and to the ground. Nicole ran to him draping her arms around his neck. Gibbs reached his left arm out and wrapped it tightly around her shoulders, slamming her close to his body.

"It's all right now, Kido," Gibbs said groggily. His mind was shutting down as the blood continued to rush from his body Nicole put her hands on his face and he could tell her lips were moving but he heard nothing. His eye sight dimmed, his heart was slowing and he couldn't feel very much on his right side. His breathing was becoming labored but it didn't matter much to him. He hugged Nicole, placing a kiss on her forehead as the world around him faded to black.

* * *

Jen was looking into the car window of the parked car when she heard the gun fire. She shot straight up and looked around, spotting Gibbs on the ground. Her heart panicked feeling sick to her stomach. She watched as Kirkpatrick stepped on his back, listening as Gibbs moaned in pain.

She drew her own firearm and took the scene into account. There were two men standing over Gibbs one holding the girl the other was the man from the plasma screen. She watched as Kirkpatrick kneeled over Gibbs and she started towards them with gun raised. She took aim and moved quickly across the lawn towards the crowd. She was spotted and Kirkpatrick came towards her. Jen then heard a car pull in behind her and prayed it was DiNozzo and David.

Kirkpatrick came at her seemingly unarmed aside from the knife in his hand. She aimed her weapon at his head and stopped, standing ready to take the shot. The smile on the man's face that was coming towards her was enough to make a shiver flow down her spine. He moved with ease as he showed off his knife. He stopped short of her with the feral smile planted on his face.

"NCIS, you're under arrest," Jen said as she heard a car door behind her. The car was out of sight from where they stood now.

"Nice of you to drop by, NCIS," Kirkpatrick said. "You're partner over there underestimated me. How about you?"

"Put the knife down," she said. Kirkpatrick shook his head at her as he continued to smile. He stepped closer, knife twisting in his hand. Jen steadied her self, ready to take the shot. Kirkpatrick lunged at her and she fired. The bullet stuck him in the chest but he continued to come at her, knife in front of him now.

She tried to pull the trigger again but the distance was closed and he was on her. The knife slid into her shoulder and she cringed with pain as she fought with him. The knife was pulled out quickly, ripping her flesh even more as her hand sprang forward to stop the second blow. She tried to bring her gun up to fire again but Kirkpatrick's other hand knocked it from her grip. She fought with him as he attempted to stab her again. She heard footsteps and yelling behind her but she was so enraptured in the battle before her she didn't understand what was being shouted, and she couldn't respond.

His strength was greater than hers as he forced the knife slowly down towards her throat as she fought with everything she had to keep him away. The grin on his face increased, his eyes dancing with pleasure as the tip of the blade scraped against the skin. It was then that she heard the report of another firearm behind her. Kirkpatrick's eyes widened as the life drained from them. She felt the blood splatter from the hole in his neck as he slumped to the ground at her feet. The knife fell as her hand came up and tested the skin on her neck it had kissed.

She turned and saw DiNozzo running past her as Ziva came up next to her, a gentle hand slipping to her shoulder. Jen looked at her friend and nodded she was ok. As she pulled her hand from her neck there was blood on her fingers. Ziva examined the wound but it was superficial.

They heard DiNozzo yelling and both looked up. They saw three bodies slumped on the ground, and Jen felt another surge of panic grip her chest. She turned from Ziva and ran, with the Israeli on her heels, towards Gibbs. When she came up next to him DiNozzo was on his phone calling for paramedics. Jen dropped to her knees next to him and placed a hand on his forehead. Nicole looked up at her with desperate eyes.

"Is he dead?" she asked through ragged breath. Jen felt tears stinging her eyes as she reached down putting her fingers to his neck feeling for his pulse. She took a deep shuttering breath when she felt a weak one and looked at Nicole.

"No," she said softly as the girl leaned down again and hugged the unconscious Gibbs. Jen took his left hand in hers and held it while Tony yelled into his phone. He finally shut it and looked down at Gibbs with his hands on his head, eyes wet with emotion.

"Paramedics are on the way," he said before pursing his lips. He then walked over to the other man lying on the ground, nudging him with his shoe. He found the knife still sticking deep in the man's throat, his eyes widened forever in the fear of death.

Nicole slumped down on Gibbs and tried to listen to his heart beat. She couldn't hear it. The Director had told her he was still alive but she couldn't hear his heart beat. She was crying now, her eyes useless against the blinding power of her tears. She held to him tightly unwilling to let him go.

"You can't leave me, Gibbs, you just can't," she whispered leaning close to his ear. She buried her head on his chest as the Director sat next to them with Gibbs' hand in hers. She had heard Tony say the paramedics were coming and she prayed they made it on time. He was still alive, but for how long.

* * *

_Gibbs drifted through the black. He couldn't see anything in front of him but he knew he had to go that way. There was something there drawing him closer and closer to whatever lay in front of him. He followed his heart, letting it lead him through the maze of darkness. Finally there was a light ahead, a beacon calling to him as he stumbled through the haze of his alternate reality. The pain in his shoulder was gone now, the numbness a memory of the past._

_He entered through the portal feeling the warmth of the light hit his face. He closed his eyes and basked in the glow. It felt so warm and right he didn't want it to stop. He moved a little further into the room now, soaking up the light as it bathed his body. It took away the hurt, the fear, the sorrow of his heart. He felt like he could stay where he was forever and never have another worry in his life. The harness capturing the burdens of his guilt was lifted from his heart as he stood in the strange room under a light that seemed to have no source. He felt at peace for the first time in a long time.

* * *

_

DiNozzo stood after checking on the man he recognized as Travis Mann. They had all the components now; everything seemed to be falling into to place. They would be able to bring down the weapons ring with what they'd gathered in the last half a week. He should have felt the pride of a job well done, case solved, but instead he felt the pain of loss instead.

He stared at Gibbs again and felt the tears falling down his face as he squatted next to his mentor and boss. Ziva came up behind him and placed her hand on Tony's shoulder, causing Tony to look up at her with pleading eyes. She closed her own and shook her head. He looked back at Gibbs.

He took stock, Gibbs shirt was soaked in dark sticky blood, coming from a wound in his shoulder. He thought about prying the girl from Gibbs' chest and examining her as she too seemed to be covered in blood, but he didn't have the heart to separate her from him just yet. They heard the distant wail of sirens and three silent prayers were sent to the heavens to bring this man through this alive.

TBC…


	34. Rushing Against Time

**Chapter Thirty Four: Rushing Against Time**

The sirens were growing closer as the ambulances and police got nearer. Tony squatted next to Gibbs and pulled his own NCIS jacket from his shoulders. He wrapped it around Gibbs' shoulder and squeezed the front and back, applying as much pressure as he could. Ziva went out to the road to direct the paramedics as Nicole continued to lie on Gibbs' chest. Jen kneeled next to Gibbs, her good hand still gripping his. Her other arm lay cradled across her midsection as her shoulder ached and burned.

Tony looked at Director Shepard's shoulder and pursed his lips. He then looked down at Gibbs as the tears built. He glanced over at the dead man laying just mere inches from them, knife still protruding from his neck. His gaze then traveled to the dead man he had shot in the neck lying on the grass a hundred feet away.

Tony pressed with all he had on Gibbs' wound, holding the blood in the best he could. He was no doctor but from the look of the grass and Gibbs' clothing, he had lost a lot already. He knew that was bad. He swiped his shoulder across his eyes, catching the tears and smearing them across his face.

Looking up he saw Ziva standing in the road with hands on her hips watching the front entrance. Tony could see the revolving lights of red and blue coming towards them now as the first wave of cops were arriving. An ambulance pulled in behind the second cop car and then two more cops turned in. Ziva directed them where to go and worked with the cops to secure the area.

Tony was grateful for that. He couldn't bear to leave Gibbs at this moment to do something so mundane. Two paramedics rushed up beside him with stretcher and bags. The first one kneeled next to Tony, shouldering him gently, forcing him away from Gibbs. The man then reached down and tried to pry Nicole from her position. She screamed, some from agony, some from the terror and tension she had just endured.

Tony put a hand on the paramedic to stop him and then gently wrapped his hands around the child lying on his boss. He leaned in close to her ear, listening to her erratic breathing. He pulled her slightly up, placing his lips next to her skin.

"Honey, you have to get off him now, they need to help him," Tony said as gently as he could. He then felt another set of hands on his. He looked up to find Director Shepard helping him remove Nicole. She fought them for a moment before she just simply gave up. Tony lifted her to his shoulder and held her tightly as he walked away from his boss. The paramedics began their routine to save Gibbs, but Tony could no longer watch.

Director Shepard was behind him, walking close on his heels, as he carried the child towards the chaos of vehicles coming into the construction site. A second ambulance pulled in, lights flashing, and stopped. Tony made his way over towards it.

"These people need to take care of your injuries, Nicole," he said softly as the child clung to him, her eyes staring blankly at Director Shepard over his shoulder. Director Shepard reached out and stroked the child's hair trying to sooth her. Tony sat Nicole on the back of the ambulance as a female paramedic came around to her.

"Do you know what happened to her?" the woman asked Tony. He looked at Director Shepard.

"I don't," he replied. Jen simply shook her head, as her own eyes drifted back over her shoulder to Gibbs. The two paramedics were still tending to him on the grass.

"What's her name?" the paramedic prompted.

"Nicole," Jen said softly still drawn to Gibbs, unable to break her eyes from his body.

"Nicole, sweetie, my name is Janelle. I need you to tell me what hurts," the woman said softly. Nicole stared at her a moment, testing her body. She looked down at the blood stains and started to cry again.

"My leg, he cut my leg," she wailed before her hands came up to her neck. She didn't say anything but the paramedic noticed the cut in Nicole's throat as well.

"Anything else hurt?" Janelle asked calmly.

"He squeezed my shoulder really hard," Nicole sobbed as she struggled to see around the paramedic. She failed becoming more agitated and frightened. "Where's Gibbs?"

"Sweetie, I need you to focus on you right now," Janelle said as she pealed Nicole's pants back enough to look at the nasty gouge left by the knife.

"No," Nicole said as she started to struggle against the paramedic. Jen stepped forward and wrapped her arm around Nicole's shoulders pulling her tightly to her chest. The pain in her other shoulder made her wince but she held her ground with the child.

"Nicole, there's nothing we can do right now," Jen said with tears in her eyes. "Let this lady help you."

The child went slack in the Director's arms as Tony squeezed his eyes shut. _This is NOT happening_ his brain screamed in torment. He then put a hand on the Director's arm as she still maintained contact with Nicole.

"You should be checked too," he said softly. Jen looked at him with defiance in her eyes for a moment before she realized he was right. She nodded and sat down next to Nicole on the back of the ambulance.

"She'll need stitches on that hip. Looks like her shoulder is pretty bruised up, we'll need to take x-rays of it to be certain it's not broken. I think the cut on her neck is superficial. Have her legal guardians been notified?"

Tony shook his head no. They had not informed social services or the Parks that they had found Nicole. There had been no time since everything had happened. Tony made a note to have the Metro PD radio back to the officers at the house. The paramedic looked at Tony and pursed her lips slightly before shifting in front of Director Shepard. Tony instinctively stepped in front of Nicole to block her view of Gibbs on the ground.

"I can't treat her without parental permission," Janelle said as she pulled the Director's shirt back.

"Her parents are dead," Tony said quietly looking over his shoulder at the man who killed her mother. Nicole stared at Tony's chest with tear filled eyes. Tony noticed that the two paramedics had Gibbs on a stretcher now and were rushing him towards the waiting ambulance. He turned back to this ambulance.

"Who is her official guardian, we need permission," Janelle continued.

"Take these two to the SAME hospital they just took that man too. I'll get everything you need," Tony said as they heard the doors slam on the first ambulance before it pulled away with the siren blaring, lights ablaze. Tony closed his eyes and took a deep breath, a good sign, they had a pulse.

Janelle examined Jen's shoulder by pushing and prying at the skin. Jen ignored her for the most part wincing involuntarily. Tony watched Ziva interacting with the cops as her vision trailed the ambulance that had just left. She turned and looked at Tony, but he could only shake his head. He walked towards Ziva and asked if she had everything under control. She nodded as another team from NCIS was getting out of their cars.

They both headed back towards the ambulance as Janelle was finishing up with the two patients. The paramedic was packing her supplies back into the bus as she explained to Director Shepard that both would need to go to the hospital. Tony stopped, leaning on the bay of the doors.

"I'll call Ducky and Abby at headquarters and let them know where he is. I'm sure they probably already heard," Tony said regretting that it wasn't him that had told either of them of the tragic news. "I'll also get a hold of McGee in California."

"Thank you, Agent DiNozzo," Jen said as the paramedic motioned for her and the child to climb into the bus for transport. Tony nodded and walked away from the ambulance towards the car with Ziva next to him. They both sat in the vehicle and waited as the ambulance pulled into the street, then they followed. Tony pulled his cell phone from his pocket as he drove.

"I can make the calls," Ziva said.

"No," Tony said as he punched the button for Abby's lab. Abby picked up almost immediately.

"Tell me this is some sick joke, Tony," she said in a whisper.

"I'm sorry, Abbs, I can't," he said his throat closing slightly on him making him sound slightly froggy.

"What happened?"

"Gibbs was shot, Abby, he took one round in the back, through his shoulder. He lost a lot of blood and was unconscious when they took him away in the ambulance," he replied. He told her where they were taking him as well as what had happened to Kirkpatrick and Mann. While telling the story he filled her in on Nicole and Director Shepard.

"Tony," Abby said through tears.

"Just meet us, Abby, and bring Ducky," Tony said as he closed his phone.

Jen sat next to the gurney as Nicole laid on it. Nicole had shut her eyes now as her face was stained with mud, blood, and sweat, the tears mixing it all together. She had her small fists clenched at her sides and Jen didn't know how to comfort her. She laid a gentle hand across the girl's shoulder and waited.

The ride to the hospital seemed to take for ever and it was rough going. Every bump they hit seemed like they had run over a small mountain as the vehicle shook and shuttered on its why to its destination. Jen finally saw the hospital come into view and felt her stomach constrict. She fought the urge to vomit as she thought about Gibbs being rushed into the emergency room before them.

The ambulance pulled to a stop and Tony found a parking place in the lot as he and Ziva hurried to catch up with Jen and Nicole. Justin Parks was just pulling up when they pulled Nicole from the back of the ambulance. He immediately gave consent to treat. Jen and Nicole were ushered in and taken to separate rooms much to the despair of Nicole. She whimpered and cried the entire time as the nurse stitched her leg shut and the tech x-rayed her shoulder. Justin Parks was allowed to go with her but the girl refused to have him by her side.

Nicole's x-rays came back negative for breaks and the girl was given a hospital gown to wear instead of the pants and shirt she came in with. She was taken out to the waiting room but refused to go her foster father and latched herself to a chair wailing. Tony stepped in front of the other man and asked him to step back. Justin put his hands up and went to the other side of the room.

"You can't make me go with him," Nicole said with venom.

"I wouldn't dream of it," Tony said softly.

"I want to stay with Gibbs," she said with fear in her voice.

"I know," Tony said nodding in agreement. "Tell you what, let's find the Director and then find Gibbs. What do you say? Just you and me?"

"Lead the way," Nicole said a ghost of a smile playing over her lips before quickly disappearing. Tony's head bobbed once quickly before he reached his arms out and Nicole let him scoop her up, careful of her stitches. He simply walked from the waiting area ignoring the shouts from behind him.

They found the Director and Tony set Nicole down next to her as they finished bandaging her shoulder. Jen looked at Tony with a confused look. Tony shrugged and patted the girl on the head before turning and walking to the door, peeking down the hall to make sure no one had followed them.

Instead he saw Ziva and he whistled low at her to get her attention then motioned for her to join them. Ziva came down and slowly entered the room seeing Jen sitting in the middle with Nicole next to her. The nurse finished with a smile and told Jen how to care for the stitches and when to come back to get them out. Finally it was just the four of them in the room.

"Have you seen Abby or Ducky yet?" Jen asked as she slid from the bed and stood. Tony shook his head and Ziva followed suit. Jen looked down at Nicole and then back at Tony.

"I think we should find the doctor," Tony said and turned sharply leaving the room. He was just entering the waiting room, Justin Parks approaching him, when Abby and Ducky came in the front doors for the emergency room. They were scanning frantically and Tony sidestepped the angry man in front of him, ignoring him, and came up to Abby and Ducky.

"I called Tim," Abby said softly. "He's coming back as soon as he can."

"Good," Tony said.

"How is he, Anthony?" Ducky asked his hands wringing slightly from his angst.

"We don't know yet, Ducky, he didn't look good when they loaded him at the scene," Tony said fighting to hold the tears back. "Director Shepard and Ziva are this way."

Tony led Abby and Ducky down the hallway and to the room where the others waited. They stood silently not sure how to proceed for a moment before Ducky seemed to snap out of what ever trance he was in.

"I'll find us a doctor and get an update on Jethro's condition," Ducky said quickly leaving the room. The rest remained silent as no one knew what to say to comfort the one next to them. They were together and that was what mattered. The rest of the team was in one piece, they just needed their leader to pull through to make it a successful closed case.

TBC…


	35. Finding Comfort

**Chapter Thirty Five: Finding Comfort**

Jen sat leaning back on the gurney of the room she had been stitched up in, with Nicole sitting leaning against her chest. Her good arm was wrapped snuggly around the girl while her chin rested on Nicole's head. The eleven year old sat quietly picking at the sheet covering the gurney below them, welcoming the comforting feel of the arm wrapped around her.

Tony stood against the wall, his head tilted back, resting against the plaster. He stared blankly at the ceiling letting the tears slide silently down his cheeks. His arms wrapped tightly around Abby's shoulders as she stood in front of him, her face buried in his chest, soaking his shirt with her tears. Ziva sat on a stool with arms crossed over her chest biting at her lower lip

Ducky had not returned with news yet and the team was fearing the worst. Their leader was down and no one knew if he was going to pull through. They didn't exchange words; none were needed as they silently prayed for the best. Nicole shuttered as she thought about the ordeal that had happened and Jen pulled her closer yet, bringing her cheek next to the girl's. Nicole closed her eyes tightly, trying to make the images stop.

Tony turned his head when he heard someone come in the room, as Abby peeked one eye up from Tony's shirt before she buried her head once more. Ziva stood from the stool, arms dropping to her sides, her left index finger finding a belt loop absently. Jen raised her head up as Nicole rocked slowly in her arms.

"I've spoken with the emergency doctor that worked on Jethro," Ducky said lightly as he came in the room looking rather drained. The look on the older man's face was enough to make DiNozzo physically ill as he felt his stomach clench. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Abby brought her head up so she could see Ducky as Ziva stepped closer to the three. Jen stared at the ME with wide eyes as they waited for his next words. Finally Ducky continued.

"There was extensive damage done to the shoulder muscles and bones. The doctor said the bullet enter through the back, tearing through the Teres Major and Minor muscles before cracking his scapula. The bullet then ricocheted breaking his clavicle from the acromion. It then exited through the trapezoid muscle, tearing it from the deltoid muscle."

"What does that mean, Ducky?" Tony asked with a heavy sigh as the others tried to make heads or tails of Ducky's explanation.

"It means, dear Anthony, that they had done what they can for him down here and have sent him upstairs with the surgeon to piece him back together," Ducky said softly.

"Is he stable?" Jen asked as she squeezed Nicole just a little bit tighter.

"They said he was in critical condition from the amount of blood loss he sustained at the scene and in transport. They are not saying either way. The doctor said it was simply too early to tell," Ducky said as he closed his eyes. "God help you, Jethro," he whispered softly.

"I want to see him," Nicole said softly her chin tucked to her chest as she clenched her eyes. Her hands were softly gripping Jen's arm as they clung to each other. Abby let go of Tony as he pushed away from the wall. He walked around her and came up next to the gurney.

"We all do, Kido, but we can't right now. When the doctors have him patched up, ok?" he said gently. Abby walked up next to Tony linking her arm in his. Ziva looked on from the other side of the gurney as Ducky took the foot end. They stood for a moment in silence as Nicole looked up at Tony with soft scared brown eyes. She then ducked her head and hid her face as a torrent of fresh tears ran down her cheeks. Tony reached out and gently laid a hand on her head as Jen moved her hand on Nicole's back in a calming manner.

A man appeared in the doorway wearing light green scrubs looking slightly nervous. Tony turned and looked at him but it was Ducky that approached the man. As Ducky came up in front of him, the man in scrubs cleared his throat and took a breath.

"I'm sorry, but we need the room," he said softly with apologetic eyes. Ducky nodded slowly and turned to the team. "There's a waiting room upstairs outside of surgery that can accommodate you."

"Thank you," Abby said as she turned with Tony. Jen slid from the gurney and gently pulled Nicole with her. The girl slumped to her knees and hugged herself, not wanting to walk. Abby let go of Tony as he came around the gurney, scooping Nicole into his arms. Jen walked behind him as the girl draped her head over his shoulder. Ziva came up next to Jen as Abby walked next to Tony. Ducky followed the man in green scrubs as he led them to the room they could wait in.

The room was small, holding ten plastic chairs, arranged in two rows of five. Each chair in the row was connected to the one next to it, making a train of sorts. They were a navy blue in color and stood out against the forest green flat carpeting that was on the floor. The walls were stark white with basic still life paintings serving as decoration. It was very dreary as they walked in, and the mood of the team made it even worse.

Ziva sat in the chair closest to the door as Ducky sat to her right. Tony sat on the other row in the middle chair as he set Nicole down to his left, Abby sat on his right her hands clenched together in her lap. Jen sat down on the other side of Nicole wrapping an arm around the girl.

Nicole leaned heavily into Jen and closed her eyes. She was extremely tired as it neared four in the morning but she knew she couldn't sleep. She knew that the old nightmares were still lurking as the new ones were just forming. The team once again dropped into a silence that personified the current mood. They had nothing to say to each other that would make them feel better, or change the situation so they kept quiet, taking comfort in the simple fact that they were together.

"I wish Tim was here," Abby said after the quiet was growing unbearable, as she picked at the hem of her shirt. Tony wrapped an arm around her and leaned over gently kissing her hair.

"I know, Abby," he said softly. Ziva had closed her eyes and leaned her head on Ducky's shoulder and appeared to have fallen asleep as Ducky stared at his feet with his hands gently clasped in his lap. Tony was anxious and agitated with the waiting, they had been in the room for hours now, at least he thought they had. He really didn't know how long they had been there.

He checked his watch, only forty five minutes. He sighed heavily and shook his head; this would be the death of him he thought. The waiting game was the worst kind of game to play. Abby leaned against him and closed her eyes as the past couple days of long hours caught up with her. Tony was exhausted as well but his mind was too wound up to sleep.

Jen sat watching Nicole as the child shifted trying to find a comfortable position. The arm rest seemed to be in the wrong position for her. She whimpered slightly when she banged her hip of the side of the chair and both Tony and Jen reached for her. She shook her head making both sit back into their chairs.

Another half hour crept by feeling like ten days as they waited. There still was no news as the surgeons went about patching up their boss, their friend. Tony closed his eyes and saw Kirkpatrick's, the sadistic sneer on his face as he forced the knife to Director Shepard's neck, before flashing to the surprised wide eyed look of someone realizing they had reached the end of the line.

He had not watched the life drain from the man's eyes, though now he wished he had. At the time he had been more worried about getting to Gibbs. He had not known Mann was dead when he shot Kirkpatrick. Gibbs had some how taken care of the other man even after being shot.

Tony gritted his teeth as Kirkpatrick continued to plague his mind, filling his inner thought with pictures of the man that caused all this in the first place. He clenched his eyes and forced the images out, clearing his mind and trying to think of nothing. His shoulder was starting to tingle from where Abby was using him as a pillow but he didn't care, she needed the sleep. He flexed his hand repeatedly trying to stimulate blood flow. It didn't work but it gave him something to occupy his mind with.

Ducky's mind was cluttered with images of Gibbs from the years he'd known the man. Gibbs was definitely the most hard headed person Ducky had ever come in contact with. The man also had a soft side Ducky knew, that was genuine, caring, and loyal above all else to what he believed in. He smiled to himself as the memories floated randomly through his mind.

Ziva woke with a slight jump as her mind tumbled into darkness during her sleep. She blinked a few times before sitting up a little straighter. She checked her watch and pursed her lips noticing that not much time had passed. She looked around at the somber faces of the team members and felt their pain, first Kate now Gibbs. It was a devastating blow and if the man died it would ruin the people in this room.

She knew that they were still reeling from the loss of Kate and if Gibbs didn't pull through this latest episode of dramatics the team would self destruct. She took in a deep breath letting it out slowly as she stretched out more in the chair. Her back was starting to ache from sitting on the hard plastic for so long.

The waiting continued. Another hour passed as they sat in a room clinging to each other in silence praying for word. They didn't know what was going on, but the fact that they were still in the operation room had to be a good sign, he was most likely still alive.

* * *

McGee boarded the plane with a twisted stomach. Abby's phone call had shaken him to the core as she told him what had happened. He had looked up to find Brack coming towards the doorway with a questioning look in his eyes.

"I need to get back to Washington now," McGee said with a soft voice, afraid he would shatter his existence if he raised it. A frown crept over Brack's features as he slowly nodded.

"What's happened?" the man asked sincerely.

"My boss," McGee started but stalled thinking about what he was about to say. Finally he continued. "He was shot tonight and is in the hospital. They don't know what's going to happen."

"I'll arrange for a flight back. There are cargos going out of here all times of night," Brack said turning from the door and heading towards the phone. McGee was grateful he wouldn't have to figure out a way home.

McGee gathered his belongings as his heart hammered in his chest. He carried his small bag out to the kitchen where Brack was writing something down as he listened to the phone. When he hung up Brack looked at McGee.

"Got you on a cargo that leaves in twenty minutes. I'll take you."

"Thank you," McGee mumbled as his mind was scattered thinking about the news. Brack ushered him out the door and into the car. They headed towards the air strip.

"I'll have Malford and Deeves flown to Washington in the morning. I'll accompany them myself," Brack said as they arrived. McGee nodded his thanks before turning to the man.

"Thank you for this," McGee said.

"Be with your team, Agent McGee, you're needed," Brack said with a nod. McGee got from the car and walked to the cargo plane he was to ride to Washington. Once on board he tried to find a place in the seat that was comfortable enough to sleep on, but he found he was wide awake now. It would be a long five hours on the plane.

* * *

Time seemed to slow, then crawl, then move backwards as the agony of word dragged on for hours. The sun was peeking up over the horizon now and still no doctor had come to talk with them. Multiple times Tony and Ducky had risen and left the room trying to track down some kind of word. All they could muster was that he was still in surgery, but that meant he was still alive.

It was almost eight in the morning when someone came towards the room. Tony rose to his feet, gently sliding Abby's head to the side first. She jumped awake and looked around before standing up next to Tony. Nicole rose and came around in front of Tony as his hands landed idly on her shoulders. Jen stood and joined the group, as Ducky and Ziva stood as well.

"I'm Dr. Jared Wilson, are you Special Agent Gibbs' team?" the man said.

They all nodded in unison, no one brave enough to speak aloud. The doctor looked at each one in the eye before his gaze landed on Nicole. She looked back at him with hope in her eyes as she fought to keep the tears at bay, she was tired of crying.

"Are you his daughter?" the doctor asked her. Her heart seemed to skip a beat and the pain and memory of losing her mother jumbled across her brain before she slowly shook her head no. The doctor gave a quizzical look before he shook his head.

"What's the damage?" Ducky asked.

TBC…


	36. Facing the Demons

**Chapter Thirty Six: Facing the Demons**

_The light took his worries away as he basked in the glow of it. He opened his eyes but the light was brighter then anything he had ever encountered. He immediately had to close his lids once more. He turned around in the room sensing something or someone behind him. He was reluctant to open his eyes, to have the light burn his retinas once again. But something inside him told him it was ok._

_He opened his eyes and almost fell to his knees, before him stood Kate. He stood in dumbfounded awe as he stared at her form, leaning calmly against the wall that he didn't remember being there. The room had come into view now as the light seemed to have dimmed a bit. The warmth was still all around him, making him feel content, but he could now make out his surroundings. _

_He stepped closer to her afraid she would disappear instantly. He reached out and touched her shoulder, gently applying pressure. The corners of his mouth pitched upward in a grin that hadn't been seen in a long time. He felt overwhelmed with a calmness and peace. His knees grew weak and he tumbled to the ground._

"_I thought you were dead," he said as tears came to his eyes. He flexed his hands as a vague feeling of something washed over him, as if something had drastically changed recently. He shook the feeling from his head._

"_I am," she replied tilting her head to the side, locking eyes with him. He saw the compassion in hers as she kneeled down in front of him. He studied her eyes for a moment, looking for the glint of humor. He didn't find it; all that stared back at him was sincere truth._

"_Then how are you here?" Gibbs asked as he reached out and cupped her face. "You feel real enough."_

"_I'm not there, Gibbs, you are here," she said softly. Gibbs face came together in confusion, as he looked around him._

"_Why am I here?" Gibbs asked closing his eyes and trying to remember how he got here. The darkness had been cold and sad, and he remembered coming towards the light, the warm enveloping him as he entered the room. But as for how he ended up in the darkness he could not tell._

"_You need to let go, Gibbs," Kate said as she brushed a palm along his jaw. He closed his eyes relishing in her touch. She leaned in and gently kissed him on the lips. When his eyes opened Kate was gone. He stood confused and turned around, looking behind him. His breath caught in his chest and tears welled in his eyes._

"_Kelly," Gibbs whispered as he saw his daughter standing on the other side of the room. He moved swiftly drawing her into his embrace. He squeezed tightly and stroked a hand down her blonde hair. _

"_Daddy," she said with a giggle. "You're squeezing me too tight."_

"_Sorry, Baby," he said releasing his grip and leaning back to look at her angelic face. His smile expanded across his features, reaching his blue eyes, making them sparkle with unconditional love. He shook his head in disbelief. _

"_Daddy, you're crying," she said as she reached out and brushed her fingers along his cheeks to wipe them away. He closed his eyes as his daughter's hands caressed his face. When he opened them again she was smiling at him._

"_I miss you, Baby," he said with a sigh. Kelly's head tipped to the side as she smiled a bright smile at her father and giggled. She had her hands on his shoulders lightly massaging._

"_I know you do, Daddy, but it's not your fault," she said. Gibbs felt the tears escape again from his eyes, only this time they were of guilt and sorrow. The warmth of the light was leaving him as he relieved the painful memories of that day. _

"_It was my fault, Baby," he whispered, closing his eyes tightly as he fought to drive the images from his mind. He felt his daughter lean in close to him, her lips close to his ear, as she whispered to him._

"_No, Daddy, it was something beyond your control. Look at me, Daddy," she said pulling away from his ear. He opened his eyes and looked into her beautiful blue ones. He felt the pain in his heart as he stroked his hand through her hair again. She studied his face._

"_What, Baby?" he asked._

"_You need to let go, it's killing you inside," she said as she leaned forward and wrapped her small arms around him squeezing as tightly as she could. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of her arms around him once again, something that had haunted him since the day he saw her die._

_He felt her there one moment then she was gone the next. The emptiness in his arms sunk to his heart and he cried, on his knees, his face in his hands. He nearly jumped when a hand came down on his shoulder from behind. The touch burned his flesh for an instant and shot a shock wave through his right side, ending in numbness in his hand. It was gone an instant later and he thought there was something familiar about the pain. The thought was quickly chased away when he looked behind him._

_He nearly tumbled over as his equilibrium failed him for a moment. His hand caught him as he pushed himself back upright and rose to his full height. He stood motionless as he stared at the woman in front of him. She looked back at him with sorrow filled eyes, holding enormous amounts of pain. He felt it radiate from her soaking into his own being as he took a step closer._

_He reached out when he was in front of her touching her cheek and feeling the tears falling down his face again. He tilted his head to the side in disbelief as she looked back at him with empty eyes. She had a frown on her face, one of deep pain and sorrow. It was the look he ignored so long ago._

"_Shannon," he whispered, bringing both hands up to her face. He cupped her jaw searching her eyes for the answers he thought he needed. She stared back at him and he saw some of the sorrow and pain lift._

"_Jethro, you look worn down," she said softly as she stroked the side of his face. His hands dropped to his side as he fought the images that flooded his mind, his own pain and grief. His own guilt over her death. He looked up at her._

"_I'm sorry," he whispered feeling sick to his stomach, the warmth from the light completely gone from his body now. It was replaced with a chill as he shivered slightly. She wrapped her hands around his shoulders._

"_I only wanted one thing from you, Jethro," she said._

"_I tried, but I was…"_

"_All I wanted was you. I wanted you to grieve with me," she said with tears in her eyes._

"_I blamed myself for Kelly, you must have too," he said shaking his head. "How could I expect you to want me around?"_

"_I had just lost my child, Jethro, my daughter who came from my womb. All I wanted was the man I loved, the man who helped create her to admit he was hurting as much as I was. But you left me," she continued. Gibbs ducking his eyes, knowing full well he had abandoned her in her greatest time of need._

"_I'm so sorry, I was lost, I was consumed with grief and guilt," he said his voice shaking with sorrow once again. Gibbs leaned in as she wrapped her arms around him tightly pulling him to her. _

"_I know," she said. "I know that now. I forgive you, please forgive me," she said with a shutter as she clamped to him with everything she had. Gibbs closed his eyes and let the tears soak into her hair as he made the choice in his heart once again._

"_I forgive you, and I forgive myself," he said. _

"_You need to let go, Jethro, it's killing you," she said softly in his ear, the breath tickling him making him sigh deeply. As soon as the words were out of her mouth he stumbled forward as she disappeared from his grasp. He shuttered and let out a wail as his family was taken away from him once again. _

_He dropped to his knees as his hands came up to his face. He cried as he thought about having so much and losing it so quickly. He thought about what all three had told him, he thought about what haunted him in the night. The light was coming back, his shivering body warming from its touch. He turned towards it and let his body envelop in a blanket of hope. _

_There was a noise behind him and when he turned he closed his eyes. One more person, but who from his past would appear to him next. When he opened his eyes it took him a moment to recognize the woman before him._

"_You know who I am?" she asked him with a smile. He nodded slightly his eyes closing briefly while he took a deep breath to calm his mind._

"_Lt. Commander Conrad," he said when he opened his eyes._

"_Johanna will work," she said stepping closer to him. He smiled at the gesture and waited as she came to a stop in front of him. She reached out and traced his face with her fingers. "My daughter has taken quite a liking of you."_

"_Nicole," he breathed as if the name had meaning to him. He could not remember why. Her hand dropped to his shoulder and a sharp pain erupted in the back of it. He cringed as his hand reflexively clenched at the end. Then the pain was gone and he looked at Johanna._

"_But you are here when you should be there," she continued, touching his arm again. The pain exploded over the top of his shoulder this time, running down to his elbow before it dissipated once again. Gibbs looked at her confused._

"_Why do you keep hurting me?" he asked as he tries to pull away. His feet are stuck and he seems unable to move from the spot. She looks at him with the love of a mother and shakes her head slowly._

"_I'm not the one hurting you, Gibbs, look around you," she said as she touched him again. The pain started in his back, came over the top of his shoulder again and rushed down his arm. More pain spread down his back and chest, ending in his groin. His ribcage erupted in pain as his breathing became more difficult. His head turned involuntarily scanning the room._

_Kelly, Shannon, Kate, and many others that he had seen fall were standing around the room looking at him. They all held small smiles on their faces, the sadness in their eyes meant for him. He didn't understand why. He was at a lost as to why they were all sad for him; they were the ones that had left him. He looked back at Johanna and questioned her with a look._

"_They're sad because you can't let them go," Johanna said touching him again. He winced expecting the pain but got none this time, he opened his eyes and looked at her._

"_What do you mean?" Gibbs asked with shuttered breath._

"_You need to let them go, and it's not your time to join us. Go back, Gibbs, go back through the darkness. My daughter needs you, we'll all be waiting for you when your time comes, but you need to let go for now," she said softly stroking his face. The others began telling him to let go softly in his head. He closed his eyes and felt the warmth of the light fading from his mind and body. _

_When he opened his eyes again the room was empty and his shoulder surged with a pain almost unbearable. His ribs ached with an unrelenting pounding and his breathing was labored. He looked down at himself and saw a deep maroon saturating much of his clothing. He was a mess; he looked atrocious and felt like he had been hit by a train. _

_Words echoed in his mind, he must go back through the darkness; it was not his turn to be in the warmth of the light. He stepped to the door of the room and looked back; he stopped and stared as Kate stood in the middle. He looked at her with soft eyes._

"_I'm sorry I let you down, Kate," he said in a whisper. She smiled at him._

"_You didn't. It was my time, Gibbs," she replied. He nodded slowly then turned and stepped into the cold darkness outside the room. He heard his name called from the room._

"_Gibbs," Kate said stepping forward. He stopped just outside the light, surrounded by the utter black nothing. He looked through the small door at her and smiled. "Let us go, and capture what is in front of you when you get back. Don't let the past ruin your future. She's there, Gibbs, make things right."_

_With that Kate was gone and Gibbs stood a moment thinking about her last words. He didn't know what they meant but he felt the coldness nip at his open wound on his shoulder. He brought his left hand up to cover the gaping hole in his right shoulder and moved forward._

_He couldn't see where he was going but something inside of him was leading his path. He seemed to know just where to step, just when to turn, and just how far to travel. There was a beacon on the other side of the night that was calling him home. Home, he thought, maybe there was hope for him after all._

_He thought about everyone he had seen in the room and what each one had told him. The main theme of the night was to let go. He knew now that in order to be happy in his life he would have to let go of those that had passed through his life and already traveled to the warmth of the light, resting in the room, waiting for his return some day. He moved gracefully through the night, despite his injuries, in search of whatever was calling his name._

_The darkness would not beat him this time, he would come out triumphant. Memories of the night floated into his brain and he remembered what had happened to cause his injuries. He grew angry at himself for allowing such a stupid error, but knew that there was nothing he could do now. For now he had released the demons of his heart, allowing the dead to pass. He would grieve them still, and remember them always, but he would no longer hold them hostage in his heart, dwelling on the guilt and sorrow that he felt towards them. He would cherish their memories, and love them as he had in life. He would make some changes in his life; changes he hoped were for the better._

TBC…

**AN: The idea for this chapter came from a dream my sister had a long time ago after the death of our cousin. In her dream she was led to a room by an angel where she conversed with family members that had passed. This chapter spawned from that as a I thought it was a way for Gibbs to react to his demonsand realize why the dead haunted him. Just thought I'd share.**


	37. Finding a Family

**Chapter Thirty Seven: Finding a Family**

The team stood holding their collective breath after Ducky asked the doctor for the news. Dr. Wilson seemed to sense the deep caring and compassion these people had for their friend in recovery and he cleared his throat to ease their tension. He made sure to look at everyone while he was speaking, to reassure them of what he was saying.

"It is still touch and go but at this time he made it through surgery and is in recovery. There was extensive damage to his right shoulder that needed repair done and he will be without the use of his right arm for a long time before he'll need physical therapy.

"The bullet fractured his scapula and broke the clavicle from the acromion. In this current condition, never mind the muscle damage, he won't be able to move the shoulder at all. The clavicle will need to refuse to the acromion first. We also had to repair his Teres muscle group, both the major and the minor.

"Those are the muscles here," he said reaching around his back and pointing to the shoulder blade. "The bullet tore through that muscle group before coming out the front through the trapezoid muscle. We had to reattach the trapezoid to the deltoid.

"His shoulder is being casted as we speak. His entire arm will be immobile for about 6 to 10 weeks depending on his rate of recovery. He also broke his third and forth ribs on the right side," the doctor finished. Tony cocked his head to the side and closed his eyes, Ziva nodded slowly as Abby grinned at the news. Nicole just watched anxious to go see him, as Jen closed her eyes and pursed her lips. Ducky was nodding listening intently to what Dr. Wilson had to say.

"So that means he's ok?" Tony asked.

"Well, Anthony, he's still alive but he is still in critical condition and it is still touch and go," Ducky started.

"But the prognosis looks good for a recovery. The question is going to be how much of one. There is a strong possibility that he will not regain full mobility and strength in his shoulder. I also saw this is not the first time his shoulder has been injured," Dr. Wilson continued.

"No, he took a bullet in that shoulder over ten years ago," Ducky said softly.

"Can I see him?" Nicole asked suddenly looking up at the doctor with big brown eyes saturated with sadness.

"You'll have to wait just a little longer, Honey, they need to finish with the cast and then you can go in and see him," Dr. Wilson replied with a smile.

With that Dr. Wilson excused himself and left the team standing together letting out their collective breath. No one spoke, again not finding the words to express what they were feeling, knowing that they didn't need to. Abby turned to Ducky after a moment.

"How serious is this, Ducky?" she asked in a quiet voice, the nail of her right index finger sticking between her teeth.

"Very, my dear. He'll need lots of help when he leaves the hospital. It is going to be a difficult road, his arm will be immobile for at least 6 weeks but most likely with the extent of the damage it will be closer to ten. And even then it will be a painful road to recovery with physical therapy," Ducky replied with a sigh. Abby nodded.

They made their way back to the room they had occupied for what seemed like a lifetime, waiting for someone to tell them it was ok to see Gibbs. The room held a heavy atmosphere as the tension of the previous night leaked from their pores.

* * *

McGee landed in Washington DC just as the sun was peeking up over the horizon. He thanked the pilots and then scrambled off the plane looking for a ride to the hospital. He finally found one after thirty minutes of frantic searching. A Petty Officer agreed to drive him. He pulled up to the front and thanked the Petty Officer before hustling through the front doors.

He asked the reception desk about Agent Gibbs and was told the rest of the team was in the waiting room on the surgery floor. They didn't have any other information for him. His gut was tight when he rode the elevator up to his desired floor. As the doors opened he looked both ways before heading to his left down the white hallway.

He came upon the group sitting silently in a room, all looking somber, but with a glint of hope in their eyes. He stopped in the doorway taking a breath before he smiled weakly at them. Abby jumped from the chair she was in and came up to him throwing her arms around him and squeezing him tight. He brought his arms around her, holding her.

"Hi," he said a little surprised. Abby leaned her head on his shoulder and he looked at Tony. Tony stood and walked up to McGee.

"He's alive, McGee, a lot of damage to his shoulder, but they think he'll live," Tony explained. They spent the next couple of minutes explaining to McGee what the doctor had relayed to them before Tony sat down again. McGee and Abby sat down next to each other, with Abby sitting next to Ducky. Abby had her arm linked through McGee's and her head on his shoulder.

McGee's gaze landed on Nicole and he watched her, studying her. Her eyes were downcast, filled with fear and sorrow. The emotional trauma that girl had suffered in the last week had to be overwhelming. Her shoulders were slumped forward almost in defeat, as her head rested lightly against the Director's shoulder. Nicole's legs were stretched out straight in front of her as the gown hung past her knees. Her eyes came up and met his locking on for the moment. McGee gave her a small smile before she dropped her eyes again and shifted positions slightly.

All seven heads slowly came up and looked at the woman that had just entered the room. She looked around hesitantly at the bodies in the room, noticing the haggard look on each face, the exhaustion expressed in their eyes. Her eyes landed on the little girl and then looked up at the woman holding her. Nicole sat forward, breaking away from Jen's grip and got to her feet staring at the woman with hope.

"Dr. Wilson said that you can come back now but only two at a time," she said softly. Nicole looked at Jen with pleading eyes and Jen nodded. Jen then looked around the room, hoping someone else would want to go first; she wanted to go last. Tony stood and nodded after locking eyes with her.

"Come on, Nicole, let's go see him," he said gently sticking his hand out towards the girl. She reached out and took it, gripping it tightly, squeezing him almost to the point of pain. Tony smiled down at her as they walked down the hallway leading to the room.

"He's in there," the nurse said pointing to a room up ahead. Tony followed her pointed finger to the room 6205 and then nodded his thanks to her. Nicole pulled him forward, walking quickly towards the shut door. Tony got there and pushed the door open and Nicole stopped just inside staring at the man in the bed.

Tony closed his eyes quickly and took a deep breath after seeing Gibbs in the hospital bed. His boss was still unconscious, arm in a full cast, positioned like a waiter's arm. The bright white cast completely surrounded his shoulder before crossing over his chest and wrapping around his back. It continued down his arm, around his bent elbow and up to his wrist. There was a support beam leading from his triceps muscle to his side.

There was a machine next to the bed silently keeping pace on his life, but other wise he simply looked like he was sleeping. Nicole broke from Tony's grasp and moved to Gibbs' side standing next to the bed. She came up on his left side and stood, watching his chest rise and fall. New tears came down her cheeks as she reached out and laid a hand on his good arm. Tony came up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"It's going to be ok," he whispered to her. She slowly nodded as she pursed her lips.

"Everything is different now though," she replied after a moment of silence. Tony looked down at her and felt his heart go out to this little girl who lost every thing in such a short period of time. It was then he saw the strong connection in her eyes as she stared at his boss.

"I know, but we'll help you through this, I promise," Tony said and he meant every word. He made the decision then and there that this kid needed a 'family' and the team was as good as any other. He knew the others would agree, and he was certain that Director Shepard had grown more than a little attached to the scrappy eleven year. He also knew that Gibbs was completely and utterly attached to this little girl. Nicole looked up at him with question in her eyes, as if she didn't understand why he would say a thing like that. He smiled down at her with all the compassion of an older brother or uncle and she knew then that he meant what he said.

Her attention went back to Gibbs. She looked up at Tony a moment with uncertain eyes. He was staring at Gibbs but felt the force of her stare and looked down. She didn't know how to ask and he saw she needed to say something.

"What?" he asked softly.

"Can I lay up there with him?" she asked almost embarrassed by her request. Tony's smile broadened and he scooped her up gently and placed her next to Gibbs. She smiled at him with appreciation before she snuggled closely into his good side. She felt her eyes growing heavy, and the fear of sleep left her. She felt safer than ever as she absorbed Gibbs' body heat. Her eyelids drooped and she finally drifted into sleep.

Tony smiled at the image. He knew there was hope now for both of them. He turned and left them in the room, heading back to the waiting room. When he came back the smile was still on his face and Abby looked up at him.

"Tony?" she questioned but he just simply shook his head before sitting down.

"Next two can go. He's in sixty-two-oh-five," he said looking at Abby and McGee. Jen eyed Tony before looking to the doorway for Nicole.

"Where's Nicole?" she asked after Abby and McGee walked out. Tony looked over at her.

"In the safest place she could find," Tony said with a smile and Jen nodded.

McGee and Abby walked into the room not knowing what to expect. The smile on Tony's face had intrigued Abby. They came through the door and stopped short, Abby's arm linked through McGee's. Abby's other hand came up to her mouth to cover the 'awe' that was coming out and McGee simply smiled. Abby looked at McGee.

"That is so cute," she whispered and hugged a little closer to McGee. Gibbs was still unconscious with Nicole sound asleep tucked closely into his side, with Gibbs' good arm draped over her holding her tightly to him. McGee smiled widely at the sight in front of him.

"Yeah, I think they're a good match for each other," McGee whispered back as they looked over their boss. Abby felt better knowing that Gibbs was going to be alright, even with the cast on his shoulder looking hideous to her. They stayed for a few moments before they returned to the waiting room. Ziva and Ducky were next to come down to see Gibbs, both smiling when they saw the child nestled with him. Ducky turned to Ziva.

"This I believe could be the best thing for dear old Jethro. A second chance if I do say so myself," Ducky said softly. Ziva looked up at him knowing what he was talking about.

"He'll need help," she said simply and Ducky could only nod. After standing watching Gibbs for a few moments they left, knowing that the Director wanted to be in the room with him. They came back to the waiting room and let her go.

When Jen came through the door she stopped and tears slipped from her eyes. The sight before her made her heart beat just a little bit faster. The image of Gibbs and Nicole together made her think seriously about her own future. She walked up to Gibbs circling around to the casted side. She pulled a chair up to the bed and reached across taking his left hand in her own hand.

She traced the cast with her eyes and then wiped at the tears with her free hand. Sitting in the quiet room she started to explore the feelings that had resurfaced for the man lying in the bed before her. The time she had spent with Gibbs and Nicole in the basement had changed her mind on him. She realized that he could open up; he could let someone love him.

The time in the elevator while she comforted him made her realize that he knew what he had done, knew he acted in protection of his own heart, disregarding the feelings of another. She also knew he was weary of falling in love again. She took a shuttering breath, trying to sort through everything in her mind, the feelings and emotions for the two people in the room were building and she knew she wouldn't be able to hide from them again.

Her next train of thought was about the little girl holding onto Gibbs with everything she had. He couldn't raise a child on his own, he would need help. He would need someone by his side. She thought about the connection and realized that she would be up for the job. She just hoped Jethro felt the same way about her.

She didn't know how long she had been in the room with Nicole and Gibbs, watching them. She was so absorbed in her own thoughts she didn't notice someone come to the door. Tony stood leaning in the door jamb watching the Director. He finally cleared his throat to gain her attention. The noise startled her slightly, causing her to jump. Tony gave a slight smile.

"Sorry," he said. She smiled back at him and shook her head.

"It's alright, I just didn't know you were there," she said softly. Tony looked at Gibbs in the bed before looking up at the Director again.

"Everyone was going to call it a day and get some sleep. We were thinking to come back up later see if he comes around," Tony continued. Jen nodded.

There was a brief pause as Tony contemplated if he should continue with what was on his mind. He looked at Nicole, watching the girl sleep peacefully for probably the first time in a week. His eyes drifted back up to the Director to find her studying Gibbs face.

"He's going to need help," Tony said finally. Jen looked up at him with questioning eyes.

"How so?" she asked.

"After he gets out of here," Tony explained. "He's right handed, and he's not going to have use of that arm for like ten weeks. That's a long time."

"I know."

"And with Nicole," Tony said. Jen's eyes came up quickly to meet Tony's before they drifted to the girl.

"He'll have help," she said her fingers intertwining with his. Tony nodded.

"I'm glad, he deserves it," Tony said.

"What do you mean, DiNozzo?" Jen asked.

"Just that, I don't know, he's had it rough as of late and he…umm, well he…deserves happiness," Tony said stuffing his hands in his pockets and averting his eyes to the ground.

"Happiness," Jen repeated. Tony's eyes came back up as his shoulder rose and fell.

"I don't know, when you answered his cell phone I just thought…um…well there was something in your voice…that…"

"That what?" she asked when he didn't continue.

"He's been acting differently since then and since Nicole came around, that's all," Tony said his face a little red.

"Are you saying you detect something more going on?" she asked as her lips curled upwards into a smile. Tony licked his lips and pulled his right hand from his pocket and rubbed the back of his head.

"Yeah," he said finally. Jen only nodded once before her shoulders rose and fell. Tony smiled at her and then slowly turned on his heel. "Get some sleep, Director, I'll see you later."

"Goodbye, Tony," she said softly and he almost stopped when he heard it but then continued to walk, a smile on his face as he made his way down to the car. He found Ziva waiting for him looking at him curiously. He slipped into the driver's seat without a word.

"What's with the smile?" Ziva asked.

"Gibbs is going to be ok," Tony said looking at her as he turned the key.

"How so?" Ziva asked. "I mean he still has a long recovery…"

"I mean emotionally," Tony said cutting her off.

TBC…


	38. Gibbs Wakes Up

**Chapter Thirty Eight: Gibbs Wakes Up**

Jen opened her eyes slowly, feeling a kink in her neck. She took a deep breath as she sat up, being extra careful not to bump Gibbs' arm when she did. She rolled her neck around slowly, feeling the bones pop before relaxing. She looked over the two in the bed, Gibbs still unconscious and Nicole still sound asleep. She glanced up at the clock and was surprised to see that six hours had passed already.

She sat back in the chair stretching her back, noting that sleeping while sitting in a chair bent over is not a good idea for the future. She covered her mouth as a yawn escaped and then settled back to watch over Gibbs. He was breathing evenly, his eyes rolling as if in dream. Her gaze dropped to Nicole, still nestled into Gibbs' side, his arm draped over her protectively. The image made Jen smile. She knew then that this was something she could get used to. The thought scared her a little, was she ready for a family?

The smile on her face increased as Nicole shifted slightly. Yes, she thought, she was ready for a family. She traced a finger along Gibbs' jaw, wishing he would wake up. The doctors had said earlier that they didn't expect him to come around until tomorrow at the earliest but Jen knew better, Gibbs would be back before the doctors knew it. She wondered how much longer she had with them before the team showed up again.

* * *

Gibbs slowly left the cold darkness and increasingly became aware of his body. His eyes were still closed, as if they were stuck. He tried to open them but his lids refused to respond. He felt the pain in his shoulder, sharp and clear. He tried to readjust the positioning and slightly panicked when he couldn't. Something was wrong. He then noticed the pang in his right side, the sharp residual stab when he breathed in.

There was something different about his left side, it felt overly warm and a bit heavy. His arm was lying on top of something. He struggled again to open his eyes but failed once more. He felt something tracing his jaw line, sensing the softness and compassion in the touch, and then it was gone.

Gibbs sat for a moment collecting his thoughts. The dream he had just had still echoed in his head, the words of his lost loved ones bombarding him to let them go, and to live his life, not let the past ruin his future. He stopped thinking, was it just a dream? He didn't know. Now that he thought about it, it had all seemed so real to him.

He shook that from his mind, it didn't matter, what mattered was the message, take a hold of what was in front of you, and _my daughter needs you_. That was the big one bouncing around his skull. Nicole needed him now. His mind processed what he could do for her, knowing that he couldn't raise a daughter on his own. Would he have the help he needed?

His mind went to Jen. He knew he could do better with her now, he knew he could show her what she needed. It was in him, and he still felt for her, and if he wanted to admit it he still loved her. He just hoped she still loved him. Would she give him the support he needed to raise Nicole? Would she be willing to help him in every aspect? Then what about his team? Would they help him raise this child?

Yes, his mind answered automatically. His team would help him in everyway that they could. They would adopt Nicole as if she was their own and help him. The next question to be answered was is he ready to be a father again? Would he be able to raise her right, turn her into a successful woman? Could he handle the emotional ride of having a child around again?

His heart had already made up his mind but he must pose the questions to himself. He admitted then that he was fully and thoroughly attached to the eleven year old girl that had come into his life a week ago. He knew that he wouldn't be able to give her up even if he agreed to. She was part of him now, just as he knew he was part of her. There was something strong between them, something connecting on a different level.

He took a deep breath and tried to move his right arm again, attempting to alleviate some of the pain. He felt a strong resistance when he did so and the pain in his shoulder increased surging down his body. He groaned and his eyes rolled in his head. He was starting to wonder why he couldn't move his right arm.

* * *

Jen heard Gibbs groan and she looked at his face, watching his eyes roll. She reached out and took his left hand squeezing it gently. His right hand twitched and he let out a second groan as his eyes fluttered open briefly before clamping closed again.

His face was a mask of pain, and Jen reached out with her free hand and gently stroked his cheek. His face turned slightly, pressing into her caress. She continued to softly run her finger up and down waiting for him to come around. His eyes fluttered again, coming opening and searching the room before shutting for a second time. She smiled and bit at her lower lip. He groaned a third time and cringed.

His eyes opened slowly, his head turning towards her. She could see he was still not focused, his eyes barely registering what they were seeing. Her smiled increased and tears came to her eyes as he stared up at her. His eyes slowly began to focus on her and he licked his lips.

"Welcome back," she said softly. He turned his head, his eyes focusing on the large white object encasing his shoulder. His arm was sticking out and then bent at the elbow pointing straight up. His eyes rolled from the cast to Jen.

She hushed him and ran a hand through his hair as the tears slipped down her cheeks. His eyes started to slowly close again as he felt the fatigue overtaking him. He struggled to stay awake. He didn't want to sink into the darkness again.

"What happened?" he whispered softly. His throat was excessively dry and it hurt to speak. He coughed and the jarring of his chest made his eyes wide again as pain ripped through his torso.

"Easy," Jen said softly. "You have broken ribs." He nodded slowly, his eyes clouding over again. "Get some more rest; it's good to have you back."

He stared at her, noticing the love in her eyes as he drifted back into unconsciousness. In the moment before he slipped into the darkness his eyes drifted down to his left side, landing on the sleeping form of Nicole. His lips curled upwards into a proud smile as his good arm squeezed gently before he was asleep.

Jen couldn't contain her happiness as the tears fell from her eyes, she wiped at them hurriedly. He was going to make it; he was going to come through this. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly as she stood up, stretching her legs. She walked from the room in search of something to eat.

After making her way to the cafeteria and eating a sandwich she walked slowly back towards room 6205. She headed towards the elevator taking it back to the sixth floor and then down the hallway. She had been gone almost an hour. When she came in the room his eyes came up to met her own, and the smile that crossed his lips lit up her heart.

He reached out with his left arm, careful not to disturb Nicole, who was still asleep even after seven straight hours. Jen walked into the room and took the offered limb and intertwined her fingers with his. She felt new tears coming and fought to keep them from falling.

"How bad is this?" he asked slowly looking at his right arm. The pain was starting to get to him. Jen could read it in his eyes.

"I'll get the doctor to give you more pain killers," she said. He nodded but his eyes stayed on hers.

"You didn't answer my question," he said, licking at his dry lips.

"It's pretty bad, Jethro," she replied pursing her lips when she was done. He closed his eyes for a moment before they came back to her.

"How bad?" he asked his voice cracking, his fear showing through.

"They don't know yet," she said closing her own eyes. She knew what he was asking her and she didn't have an answer for him, not yet. There was no way to tell if he could return to active duty, time would tell.

"How long is this contraption on me?" he said as the pain increased when his shoulder twitched.

"Most likely ten weeks. After that you'll need physical therapy. The bullet tore a lot of muscles and broke some bones." Jen said and Gibbs let go of her hand, his arm falling back into place on top of Nicole. He nodded slowly as she came around the bed to his right side. His eyes followed her, watching her move. She sat down in the chair again and laid her hand gently on his chest. He looked her in the eyes before his own traveled down to the sleeping child.

"I can't give her up, Jen," he said with a sigh.

"I know," she said softly.

"I can't do it on my own though," he continued as his eyes came back up to meet hers. She read the question in them with ease and closed her eyes slowly before opening them once more, a smile creeping over her features.

"That an offer?" she asked cocking her head to the side.

"If you want it to be," he replied with a shaky voice, his eyes dropping to the gurney. Jen reached out and gently cupped his face with her hands, bringing his eyes up to look at her again.

"If you want to try to make this work, I'm willing to try," she said with a smile as a tear slid down her face. He studied her eyes and nodded slowly his own tears starting to fall. He closed his eyes and swallowed. When he opened them again he had a smile on his face.

"I…" he started but then stopped not sure how to tell her what he wanted to. It was then that Kate's words echoed through his mind once more _let us go, and capture what is in front of you when you get back. Don't let the past ruin your future. She's there, Gibbs, make things right. _He suddenly knew what Kate was trying to tell him. His eyes brightened as his heart told him that yes indeed he wanted to try, to make both Jen and Nicole his new family. "I'd like to try and make a family," he said softly.

"That's a big step, Jethro, are you sure you're ready?" she asked.

Gibbs looked down at the sleeping child again and felt his heart soar. He knew that it was what he wanted; it was something he was willing to work for. He knew that those two women would make his life complete and help him release the past, grabbing onto his future. He looked into Jen's eyes, letting his walls down, showing the emotion that was bottled up in his heart. He watched as her eyes went from confusion to disbelief.

"It's the right step," he said as he took a hold of her hand and brought it to his lips. He gently kissed it before letting both of their hands drop to his chest. The impact hurt his ribs but he managed to hide it.

"You're absolutely positive on this?" she asked with hope.

"Yes," he said with sincerity. Her features brightened and formed into a smile that expanded all the way to her eyes. He smiled, knowing that she had just said yes. He closed his eyes for a moment to savor the thought then opened it to see her staring down at him with intense eyes. He looked around the bed and she leaned forward.

"What?" she asked.

"Where's the control wackadoo?" he asked. She smiled at him and pushed the buttons on the side of the bed. It slowly moved him into a sitting position. Nicole mumbled slightly in her sleep before she curled into a smaller ball and was back in dreamland.

Once he was sitting up and staring at her, he licked at his lips, his eyes sparkling now. Jen sat forward in the chair her hand resting lightly on his chest, with his draped over the top, the rest of his arm around Nicole. He tried to lean forward, but the cast prohibited the movement. He groaned in frustration and pain. Jen cocked her head to the side and when he opened his eyes again she leaned forward instead.

There lips came together lightly, pausing for a moment to savor to sensation before gently starting to move. Gibbs' eyes closed under they're own power. Jen was lost in the moment as they explored each other for the first time in a long time. Gibbs wanted more and ran his tongue along Jen's lips and as she was opening they heard a cough from the doorway. Jen's eyes shot open and she sat back in the chair quickly. Gibbs turned his head to the side, glaring at the intrusion.

* * *

Tony arrived at the hospital almost eight hours after he had left earlier. He was alone this time, not bothering to check if any of the rest of the team was up to visiting Gibbs yet. He knew they needed their rest. He walked into the building shaking the heebee geebees from his spine as he smelled the strong disinfectant smell.

He hated hospitals. He hated the smell, the starch white walls, the taste of the air, the utter despair in some of the patients. He hated it all. Just being in one made his skin crawl, but he knew this was a something he had to do. He made his way to the elevators and rode it up to the sixth floor before walking slowly down the hallway to Gibbs' room. When he rounded the corner of the door he stopped in his tracks. He didn't make a sound as the scene played out in front of him; Gibbs and the Director were kissing.

When he saw the kiss getting more intimate he cleared his throat making his presence know. He saw the Director shoot back into her chair, slightly embarrassed at being caught, but Gibbs expression made him smile. The glare that Gibbs tossed his way was priceless to Tony; it meant his boss was back.

"Good to see you awake," Tony said the smile still on his lips. Gibbs' glared started to falter, then turned into a smile as the younger man came in the room. Tony took in the sight of Nicole still asleep next to Gibbs, and watched as Gibbs slipped his good hand into Director Shepard's hand.

"Thanks for coming by, DiNozzo," Gibbs said softly.

"No problem, Boss, wanted to make sure you were ok," Tony said leaning against the wall.

"I'm in good hands," Gibbs said with a smile. Tony's smile brightened as he caught the connotation of what Gibbs was saying.

"That you are," he replied nodding. "Uh, I also wanted to let you know…um, that…I uh..."

"Just spit it out, Tony," Gibbs said with a sigh as Nicole started to stir next to him. Tony looked down at the floor and rubbed the back of his neck before looking up at Gibbs again.

"Well, just that if you decide that you want to, uh, raise Nicole…I'm willing to help you out," Tony said.

"You're all charm and grace, boy," Gibbs said with a smile. "Thank you, I'm going to need all the help I can get."

TBC…


	39. Starting Over

**Chapter Thirty Nine: Starting Over**

Nicole didn't want to wake up but her body was telling her too. She still felt like she hadn't slept in a while. She felt the warmth of someone else next to her and closed her eyes tighter. There were voices in the room that barely registered with her brain, and what they were saying escaped her. She rolled slightly and bumped her hip on something, causing pain to surge down her leg. She moaned and opened her eyes.

As soon as the yelp escaped she felt an arm close around her gently. Her eyes looked up and were met with Gibbs' own eyes staring back at her with concern. She gave a small smile as her hand touched where she had bumped her leg. She winced and immediately pulled her hand back. The stitches were touchy she noted. She looked across Gibbs and saw Jen staring at her.

"Hey," Tony's voice said from behind her. She rolled her head slightly looking at him before coming back and burying her face in Gibbs ribs. Gibbs winced a little at the pressure but accepted her, pulling his arm tighter around her.

"Have a good sleep?" Gibbs asked her softly. She looked up at him, watched him a moment, then nodded slowly. She realized she hadn't had a nightmare and a small smile came over her lips. Then the thought of having to go back to the Parks crossed her mind and her eyes dropped.

"What's wrong?" Jen asked reaching across Gibbs slowly and placing a hand on Nicole's shoulder.

"It's over now, they're going to take me away," she said her face buried in Gibbs' chest. Gibbs closed his eyes and when he opened them he stared straight at Jen. He was asking her silently to help him with this, asking if she was ready for the long run, if she would commit to him and Nicole on a full time basis. Jen read the emotion and question in his eye and smiled at him, holding the tears in. Tony shifted nervously against the wall, feeling like he was intruding on a special moment. Gibbs looked up at him briefly before turning back to Nicole. He put a finger under her chin, lifting her head up to look at him.

"No," he said gently. "If you want…you can…stay with me." Gibbs felt tears coming to his eyes. It was out there now; his heart was in her hands. He watched her eyes as she contemplated on what he had just said, watching her debate internally what he was asking. He saw the comprehension flit across her eyes and then the smile light up her features.

"You mean it?" she asked holding her breath, not ready to have it all taken away from her, hoping it wasn't some sick joke.

"Yeah," Gibbs replied in a hoarse voice as he smiled at the girl lying next to him. "I mean it from the bottom of my heart. You want to stay with me, I'll make it work."

Nicole smiled then looked over at Jen and cocked her head to the side. She watched as Jen watched Gibbs, noting the change in her eyes, in her demeanor. Nicole thought about living with Gibbs.

"What about you?" Nicole asked, still looking at Jen. The woman slowly turned her gaze from Gibbs down to the eleven year old a little stunned. She then smiled and swallowed.

"I'm willing to help, and see where things go," she said. Gibbs reached over with his left hand and Jen slid hers in. Nicole then scooted up, leaning against the part of the bed Gibbs had moved up, and looked at DiNozzo standing against the wall. Before she could say anything they heard voices in the hall, and then Abby knocked lightly on the doorjamb.

"Come on in, Abbs," Gibbs said with a smile. Abby surveyed the room as McGee and Ziva came in behind her. She smiled as she saw Nicole sitting up next to Gibbs in the bed, and Director Shepard and Gibbs were holding hands. Tony was leaning against the wall with a smile on his face.

"Told you he was here," Abby said turning to McGee who put his hands up in surrender. Nicole watched them a moment as they came in the room but then turned her attention to Tony again. Abby was about to say something when Nicole spoke first.

"And what about you?" she asked him. He cocked his head to the side and smiled.

"I'm game," Tony replied. Abby looked at him confused and then at Gibbs. McGee looked at the floor and Ziva stared at Tony. Nicole's smile broadened and looked at the three that just came in.

"How you doing, Gibbs?" Abby asked. Gibbs looked at his shoulder in the cast and then back at Abby.

"I'm alive," he replied with a small smile. Abby nodded, her eyes traveling to the linked hands of the Director and Gibbs. Gibbs followed her line of sight then looked back up at her. "Something wrong, Abbs?"

"Nope, something's finally right I think," she said with a smile. Nicole looked at Abby, then McGee, and finally Ziva.

"What about the three of you?" she asked as if they should understand. The three in question looked at each other confused.

"What about us?" McGee asked slowly. Abby thought about what she had asked, then thought about what she had just asked Tony. Her eyes widened and she looked at Gibbs and took a step closer to him. Abby licked her lips and too a deep breath.

"You're serious?" she asked Gibbs with a smile. He nodded and Abby let her eyes drop to Nicole. McGee looked thoroughly confused and Ziva looked at Tony for an explanation. "Anything you need."

Nicole looked at McGee and giggled at his confused look. Gibbs looked down at her and she pointed at McGee. He smiled then shook his head. It was obvious McGee didn't enjoy being the center of attention, especially since Nicole was giggling. His face was starting to turn red. Abby turned to him and put her hands on his shoulders and shook him slightly.

"Abby," he said a little embarrassed.

"Tim, you really don't see what's going on here?" she asked him. He looked at the scene in front of him with confusion then back at Abby. Ziva watched intently, not sure what was happening either. "Nicole, Gibbs, Director Shepard."

"It's ok, McGee," Nicole said from the bed.

"Look, guys, it's going to be a rough road, I'm just going to need some help here and there," Gibbs said looking at each member of his team, knowing that they felt the same about him as he felt about them. They were a family, and they would stick together to the end.

"You know we're here, for anything," Tony said. The other three nodded with agreement and Gibbs looked up at Jen, who smiled down at him with a slight nod. Gibbs then looked at Nicole who beamed back at him.

"It might be tough, Kido, I'm not the easiest man to live with. I'm grouchy, and used to being alone. I still have demons, and I still have my problems, but I think we can learn to handle it together."

"It's ok, Gibbs, nobody is prefect," Nicole replied. He smiled at her and as he looked into that child's eyes, the brightness and happiness beaming back at him, he knew that there might just be hope for him after all.

**The End**

**AN: Wow what a story. I'm really happy with this one, and to think I almost didn't continue after chapter two. Anyway, it clawed its way from the creative goo in my brain and made it's way to paper. I hope you enjoyed it, I certainly enjoyed writing it. Thank you to everyone who read this, and a huge double thank you to those who reviewed along the way and kept me going. **


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